Argument with my DM over baby items

[Firsttimer266]

Hi, long time lurker first time poster.

I am expecting my first baby, my DH and I are thrilled!

We live in a rented older terest house and have been here for 4 months now. Lovely area and nice if a bit quirky home. Because of where we live being great and having recently moved I do not want to consider moving again to better 'accommodate' the baby.

We can have minimal baby 'furniture' without missing any of the important bits and get creative with storage for toys get old enough to play with them...

My mum, however, is quite keen for us to move and have a house better suited to having a baby. Says we wont be able to get all the stuff we need. Mostly, she's going on about the pram/pushchair because our front door is steep steps and back door hasn't anywhere to put the pram.

I think this is something we can deal with when we get there? And not a huge deal?

Shes angry with me now and says I dont know cause I've never done it. Am I underescting that this isn't going to be an issue? Any easily folding pram recs welcome 😉

Remind her that's it's none of her business.
Don't allow her to spoil your family life.

We had a NUNA stroller for our last child. It was brilliant. So many great prams to choose from.

Well I do agree with her, but it's your life so you don't have to do anything you don't want to. It's not worth falling out over that's for sure.

Is it just the steps that will be an issue? If so then it will be fine, it may be a bit annoying but people live in flats with babies and get on fine.

Genuinely, why do you agree?

Thats her main issue, house isn't massive but it's a very normal size for the area

Get a small folding buggy and a good sling (ergo). Then you’ll be fine. Definitely don’t move from a nice area just because your mum says so.

do you have a car? If so, you can store the buggy in the boot of the car.

I remember being horrified years ago because I had one of those great big traditional prams that one of my friends who was actually a doctor herself had decided to just have a baby sling and a McLaren push chair for her little one
Guess what? 18 years later the children are all fine.
If you just want a little buggy type arrangement, then that will be absolutely perfect and lightweight to go up and down the stairs

Any house can fit a baby. You don't need baby furniture. We had a bassinet and a crib.

I mean for me I wouldn’t live there because of the steps and lack of space in that order. I am very safety conscious though, most people wouldn’t be so bothered.

Smaller spaces are easier to clean but with a young child can feel overwhelming unless you’re a family of minimalists as they need safe spaces to crawl, run and play.

If you have a car your pram/buggy will probably never be in the house. I had one of those systems where the car seat clipped onto the buggy frame for first months before baby moved to buggy. The buggy lived in the boot and i carried the car seat in and out. Even if you dont have a car you might have a shed to keep the wheels part in.

I bet if your terraced house is very old it has raised several generations of babies. Also if you soon get pissed off there is no reason why you cant plan to move later. You dont have to stay there permanently once you become a mum.

I agree I couldn’t imagine not being able to get straight in the house with pram if baby sleeping without navigating steps but it’s your baby not hers so if you’re happy that’s all that matters

If you have a car this isn’t an issue. Our pram lives in the boot. Slings are fab and you can get strollers that are incredibly light.

You just need a baby carrier and a backpack for when baby is tiny. When baby is a little bit bigger, get one of the fold up (mybabiie do a really lightweight one) pushchairs that you can strap them into… I used one from 5 weeks with no issues. You’ll be absolutely fine, but do NOT buy a traditional travel system it will be problematic

Millions of people have raised children in terraces and flats. You’ll be grand. Lots of terraced housing is quite roomy. I’d imagine it would be a lot more spacious than many pokey new-builds.

My pram never ever set wheel in my house - not through lack of space but because of the dirt. It went in the boot of the car. Was never a problem and I certainly wouldn’t move house over accommodating a pram.

Plus you can always change your mind once the baby is actually born and you see how you find it - I thought I’d use my pram loads, in reality most of the time my kids were in a carrier as babies.

Think I need to research what kinds of pushchairs there are...👀

Where are you going to put the pram, car seat etc?

I feel your mum wants to be involved and wants you to think she knows best, but times move on as do trends. Tell your mum that she might have a point but you're happy to see how things pan out and then adjust accordingly.
Be kind to her, she just wants to be a part if it.

Loads of small prams and strollers.

Lots of parents are living in flats.
We had a stroller for our youngst as we lived in a flat - and no problems. So easy to handle. I loved it. Folded it was in the car or in a corner behind the front door. Really not an issue.

We had a big pram with first two children as we had a house and garden living abroad. Nice to but no a need to.

@Firsttimer266 look for a stroller/pram in which the baby can lie flat at first. Much better for their spines, necks etc. You can still find something compact and lightweight even with this criteria!

You can get some very light push chairs these days, that you can easily carry up the steps (folded)
If you are otherwise happy with your home I don't think it's a huge issue

My baby’s car seat lived…in the car.

Ive never brought a pram in to my house, ever. It lives in the car too. If we walk somewhere from our house I get it out of the car. If we are going out in the car, it’s in there ready to go.

I suppose car seat will stay in the car and by the looks of these comments pram could too. Although, I didnt know about foldable prams where baby cam lie flat so I'll look into those. We can make a space in our house for this to fit folded down if thats what would woek best. We will find a way DH is great at that kind of thing.

For our first, I didn't use a pram, I used a Mclaren type pushchair with a back that drops flat (babies are supposed to lie flat at first). Mclarens are super light and easy to fold, and much cheaper than these humongous travel systems. Next time she brings it up I would just say: Thanks for the advice but we're not moving house, can we drop it.

As mentioned you need to research the stroller, pushchairs. But you also need to plan indoors for when you need to carry the baby up the steps, put them somewhere safe while you go down the steps to collect the buggy. Similarly going out, if the steps are too steep to manage the baby and the buggy together and you have to have the buggy out first. You need to be sure it’s safe while you collect the baby. But as long as you plan well, I’m sure you can do it. Many people live on first or second floors and can do it, but it does take planning.