To refuse to let DD vape?

[CoastAndSand]

DD (16) wants to vape in her room. We have tried everything for 2 years to get her to stop vaping and she won’t so the rule so far has been no vaping in the house or garden.

DD has asked recently if she can vape in her room. DH thinks it’s fine as long as she has her window open but I don’t agree with him. AIBU? I’m not happy with DD vaping at all, let alone inside the house! What would you do?

Excuse me? I categorically did not say all cannabis users go on to heroin did I?
No. I said I work with drug addicted people who 98% of started on cannabis.

@NortyElf I 100% agree with you on this statement. Also work in substance misuse

I won't be vaping in my room over Christmas. No one is allowed to vape in my house. I'm ok with the adults in my house having a few drinks over Christmas.

No but you are asserting that cannabis is a gateway drug and the evidence really doesn’t support that!

Hard no, not just because of the health risks of vaping and not wanting that in my house but more that if you make it easy for her to vape, she will vape more. My (grown up) cousin was smoking and assumed her mum didn’t know, so she had to hide it and therefore didn’t smoke as much. My aunt very much knew and said that she couldn’t stop her, but she could stop her doing it as easily and therefore ‘healthier’

So why aren’t you reporting the shop?
I agree with you no vaping it stinks.

I smoke cigarettes for nigh on 40 years, then vaped. After vaping for. Year or so I thought I had the start of COPD. Even though vapes are used as a form nicotine replacement I thought I’d better stop to make sure I wasn’t doing myself more harm. Within a few weeks of stopping vaping, all COPD symptoms had gone. I think the vaping may have caused inflammation which mimicked COPD, fortunately it was temporary, but, in my view they are definitely not harmless and really should be treated much the same as cigarettes. I’d say a har no is good. I’d also get her to stop vaping, however you can!

How scummy.

It would be hard no from me.

You're already being a soft touch and then her Dad thinks it's okay for her to smoke in her room? Madness, both of you get a hold of your child.
A 14-16 year old is buying vapes illegally and sounds like you've done nothing to stop it. Presumably you're still giving her pocket money to buy them! She should have been grounded and only allowed to go to school and back until she'd learnt her lesson, you've allowed this by being soft.

I was a smoker followed by a vaper. I found the vape far more addictive especially as I could smoke it inside.

I wouldn’t allow it and would be urging her to stop. I was told to stop vaping at my last colposcopy and was told it was just as bad as smoking cigs.

The vape also caused my teeth to go yellow and I got smokers wrinkles after a few months of regular puffing of a vape (I’m 28). Teens tend to be vain so maybe highlight the aging and dental effects of them.

I found nicotine pouches helped me wean off the vape and still use them. Not ideal but maybe something for her to consider.

Shes already doing it lol

No, as she will vape even more then, as much as I couldn’t stop it, I wouldn’t encourage it. I smoked as a teen and no way my mother would have allowed it in the house or garden.

I read about a 21 year old with lung cancer the other day. She’d been vaping since she was 16.

Absolutely not in my house or garden. If she CBA to go off the property she’ll need to quit.

I can't believe a child is being allowed yes allowed because you've done nothing about it to vape, let her do what she wants when 18 but seriously

No she will do it a lot more if she can do it in her room.

I think the adult non smokers that started is wild, but teenagers that vape are probably the teenagers that would have smoked. So it's definitely the better option?

No make it as uncomfortable as possible for her to do it if she csn do inside it will be constant..not so fun when you freezing

the thing with your dh saying it’s ok with window open etc , the smell isn’t the issue it’s the fact this will allow her to be on her vape constantly which will only serve to make her even more addicted to the nicotine and needing more and more of it , I say this as someone who vaped constantly ! It needs to be an inconvenience and an effort ie having to go outside to do it as pp have said to lessen how much she’s on it . Of course ideally she needs to quit full stop but untill she’s ready do not make it easy for her to be able to vape

Why didn’t you stop this at age 14? Grounding/no devices, no WiFi, nothing?
14 FFS. A child potentially destroying her lungs far quicker than cigarettes seem to be.
I don’t understand your ‘compromise’ as it has no bearing on her health at all.
I have 2 extremely challenging teenagers but vapes are for the stupid kids in our area.

I agree 100% with this

I don't agree. Vaping is just as addictive and damaging.

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/5-truths-you-need-to-know-about-vaping

That's American its not regulated there in the UK its heavily regulated so safer.

Absolutely this. She should have zero access to money. And you buy directly whatever she needs such as phone bill, clothes make up, bus pass, and do not give her an allowance. You should have cracked down long before now

It’s a huge problem vaping I work in a good school in an affluent area. It’s fair to say that probably 90% of the children who go to the school vape. School point so many measures to stop it but parents have absolutely no idea that their little cherubs who would do no wrong or actually vaping to and from school. I’ve lots of friend teachers who have all said it’s a similar picture in their local secondary schools. The government need to do something. We do so many PHSCe lessons. But it’s it is just so addictive and they don’t see the genuine harm like smoking does. I personally wouldn’t let my boundary down if I disagree with it so much. By letting her do that, you condoning it