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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask what's the worst thing you've ever overheard someone say about you?

233 replies

Buttercup212 · 22/12/2025 19:16

Just that really. Luckily I haven't overheard anything about myself yet, but it occurred to me today that it must happen fairly often and I'm just curious to be honest! Also, if it happened to you, did the relationship survive afterwards or did you fall out?

OP posts:
Thortour · 23/12/2025 07:18

I overheard work friends discussing me and one said that I was ugly and she wouldn't want her 'normal' friends knowing she knew someone who looked like me.

I may have not looked like she wanted me to but I'd given her £300 when her husband had left her because he had cleaned out all their bank accounts.

Hameth · 23/12/2025 07:22

My mum told my partner at the get to know them dinner she had chosen the wrong sibling. We are 28y married, A has divorced twice and not properly worked for 15 years.

Some of these stories are heart breaking 💔

Sending healing

pestowithwalnuts · 23/12/2025 07:23

At school I wore NHS specs ..had frizzy hair ..had spots and was so timid I had no personality at all.I was the but of constant jokes by boys who commented about ' ugly duckling never turning into swans' which was a reference to my surname. Often telling me to 'fuck off you ugly c**t'
Years later a lot about me had changed and I met up socially with the boys from school. It felt wonderful to see them floundering after I revealed who I was in a former life . reminded them if the names they called me and enjoyed telling them to fuck off when they asked me out

Whatsthatsheila · 23/12/2025 07:27

PersephoneSmith · 22/12/2025 21:57

I found out recently that someone who bullied me dreadfully in high school was recently awarded an OBE for ‘services to disabled people’

The main theme of the bullying was my being a ‘spastic cripple’ due to being a wheelchair user.

That wasn’t something I overheard though, obvs, I just wanted to share.
I once overheard someone tell her friend that she was to ‘shoot her’ if she ever ended up looking like me :(

Tbh I’d be emailing whomever organised the award and telling them. I am that level of withheld pettiness. Maybe nothing will happen but I’d be happy to dish out some overdue shining a light on her bullying

perhaps she’s changed massively by an extreme life event but she can’t take back what’s said

TheaBrandt1 · 23/12/2025 07:29

Feel lucky as I have only ever overheard people saying nice things about me behind my back.

Whatsthatsheila · 23/12/2025 07:33

Ofchris · 22/12/2025 23:50

Overheard ex boyfriend’s sister commenting that I was nothing compared to his ex and expressing complete shock at why he’d go out with me. His Dad was in the same room as me and tried to distract me. The whole family was toxic so it was a relief when we broke up, knowing I wouldn’t have to see them again.
Worst was in hospital with DD when she was suicidal at my lowest point and overhearing the nurse loudly telling her colleagues that I was performative and DDs mental health was no doubt down to family issues. I was trying to put on a brave face for DD who was there when I spoke to the nurse. No doubt it came across as strange because I was trying not to fall apart for DDs sake. Heard her telling colleagues the next morning that she had no mental health training (but was working on a mental health ward) which was evident.

Oh Jesus I would have shown that nurse what performative was! Disgusting behaviour. I really hope you took her to task. More importantly Inhope your DD is okay? Sending ❤️

Mumof1andacat · 23/12/2025 07:39

BigBen12 · 23/12/2025 00:26

I review internal communications as part of my job, I frequently remind people that it is all monitored by me. I have a junior colleague that loves to make fun of my physical features and clothing. For reference, I’m very normal looking, and dress work appropriate, though apparently wearing the same skirt once every two weeks isn’t allowed without ridicule. She just found out I know quite literally everything. January shall be interesting…

I hope the revenge is sweet

Brideofclover · 23/12/2025 07:41

I overheard the midwife telling the dr “I have a very overweight mum to be having a small baby….”
I was 2 days from giving birth and he weighed just shy of 10lb!!!

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 23/12/2025 07:44

Iwantsandybeachesandgoodfood · 22/12/2025 21:29

“She’s clearly helping herself to the money.” Said by a relative of my mums who had learnt that I had POA of her finances (as well as health but that was irrelevant to the narrative). I didn’t hesitate to put them straight but it was still horrible to hear.

TBH I’d think ‘That’s evidently what that person would do, if that’s the first thing they think of. Otherwise it wouldn’t even occur to them.’

Whatsthatsheila · 23/12/2025 07:45

ChocolateCinderToffee · 22/12/2025 22:52

Smirking when I asked a question that had already been asked and answered in a meeting.

I am deaf. Then there was the colleague who made a snide comment about me behind her hand in my presence. I don't know what she said but my manager roared with laughter. They refused to tell me what had been said.

Yeah fellow deaf person relating.

the worst has been too my face though … laughing, doing the “thick” slow and loud repeat voice, telling me to “catch up” , calling me stupid - (when I’m more educated than the lot of them put together?!)

people are so fucking clueless what living with a sensory disability is like and just take their own health for granted.

That’s the only plausible explanation I have for them being totally clueless to how hurtful and insensitive they are, other than thinking “well your just a massive cunt aren’t you??”

TigerRag · 23/12/2025 07:56

Dontyoulooktired · 22/12/2025 22:08

Oh, im sorry, I get this too. I am partially sighted. I’ve even had comments on here saying “how are you typing this then?”

Show quote history

I've not had those comments personally but follow some blind people on Twitter who've been asked how they post online, etc

sprinklytree · 23/12/2025 08:07

I’m a singer and used to record backing vocals for albums. I did a session in a studio but I really struggled to hear myself properly and we couldn’t get the levels right. Afterwards I heard one of the studio engineers ask how it went and the one who’d worked with me said, ‘a semitone off the whole way through’ and pulled this grimacing face. Basically he was saying I sounded like a cat wailing.

I knew it wasn’t my fault but that little comment stuck to me like glue and I didn’t do any more recording for about 5 years after that.

Motnight · 23/12/2025 08:09

When I finished university out of my close group if friends I was the only one who passed my course first time. Two friends came home with me and I heard my mum saying to them "are you sure Motnight has actually passed, she never normally manages to achieve anything, and you seem much clevere?".

Floatingdownriver · 23/12/2025 08:10

PersephoneSmith · 22/12/2025 21:57

I found out recently that someone who bullied me dreadfully in high school was recently awarded an OBE for ‘services to disabled people’

The main theme of the bullying was my being a ‘spastic cripple’ due to being a wheelchair user.

That wasn’t something I overheard though, obvs, I just wanted to share.
I once overheard someone tell her friend that she was to ‘shoot her’ if she ever ended up looking like me :(

But hopefully this means they learned and changed their way?

Iamanunsafebuilding · 23/12/2025 08:21

My mum said to my face that if I didn’t lose weight my DH would leave me ‘as he’s a good looking bloke’. I was 23, had been married a year and was a very average weight. We’ve now been married 34 years and both of us have been different weights over the years but it’s never been an issue. My mum is still the food police and really judgy of overweight people, it took me a long time to lose the insecurity over my body image

Geminijust · 23/12/2025 08:22

New in a job, bit nervous and trying to be friendly to everyone. As I left one evening, I cheerily called across the office "bye everyone, have a lovely evening". I walked round the corner and when they assumed I was out of earshot, I overheard a co-worker repeat what I said in an exaggerated cheery fashion, basically taking the piss out me. Thankfully it was a temp job and I didn't have to stay long as they were bitchy and cliquey.

HugglesAndSnuggles · 23/12/2025 08:28

My ex called me a freak for having epilepsy. He didn’t even do it behind my back, that was to my face. It’s probably why I wake up crying every time I have a seizure in public because I wonder if anyone has been laughing at me.

MamsKnit · 23/12/2025 08:32

BeforeSigourneyWeaverTheyWoveTheirOwnSigourneys · 22/12/2025 22:23

I was in a queue at my local shop, having just registered the death of my son, and overheard the assistant and a customer talking about a murder.

A teenage girl got drunk and murdered her baby in my city, she was blazing drunk and she killed him, and had been charged with murder and assault and battery. I remember thinking in passing how awful it was.

However they carried on and it was the same night as my sons death, and then it was the same street that my soon took ill on.

They were talking about me.

I've never felt rage like it, and two very shamed looking women issued two shameful apologies by the time I had done with them.

And that's the story of how I never listen to gossip anymore.

This one made me tear up. So sorry. And a warning for the rest of us about mindless gossip.

caringcarer · 23/12/2025 08:51

I struggled with Physics at school. On parents evening my Physics teacher told my Dad with me sitting next to him Caring doesn't have a snowballs chance in hell of passing her Physics exam. It was true but it still hurt. I decided to prove him wrong and worked hard on my Physics probably at expense of my other subjects. I passed my exam just. I was over the moon and I saw my Physics teacher so I rushed across to him and waved my result sheet at him and said I passed my Physics Sir. He turned to look at me and said it must have been a very simple paper that year and standards were dropping. I was crushed.

Blanca87 · 23/12/2025 08:52

Fucking hell , this a horrible thread. I’m so desperately sad for all of you who still hold these horrible comments in your head and hearts. Ladies, today is the day you release those toxic words from your soul. It will be the best Christmas gift you can ever give yourself. ❤️

Fernticket · 23/12/2025 08:58

Sending ♥️ to all the posters on here who have had such awful things said to, and about them.

ChippingSoda · 23/12/2025 08:59

Several times I’ve overheard people saying words to the effect of “she would be pretty if it wasn’t for her big nose”.

Once on a school coach when the girls behind me were discussing who was pretty in our year, and at least one boyfriend.

Made me feel awful. I like my nose now though. It’s ageing well.

TheaBrandt1 · 23/12/2025 09:04

It’s sad people are retaining bitchy comments made at school by other teens. Their brains haven’t developed and teens talk a lot of nonsense. Would you now listen to a teens assessment of your looks and personality? Hopefully not or we would all be damned! The cruel comments said by adults particularly parents are very upsetting.

TheaBrandt1 · 23/12/2025 09:05

The comments I get from my teen girls when I ask for feedback on outfits can be tough. “Garden party” was a particularly cutting one when I was trying to be cool.

Worldwide2 · 23/12/2025 09:45

Francestein · 23/12/2025 06:21

I overheard my mum saying that they’d only resuscitated me when I was born because they thought she couldn’t have other kids. She said “If I’d known I would have had “Golden Child” I would have told them not to bother and just leave her in the bucket.”

Im so sorry this is absolutely heinous 😔