My parents are obsessed with illness

[Porrrly]

Has anyone else’s parents become obsessed with illness and disease?

In the years since turning 60, both of my parents have become obsessed with illness, disease and health. They are continuously paranoid about catching anything, to the extent they will avoid meeting up with family members for a 2 week minimum isolation period to ensure all ‘contagious’ disease is gone. This is incredibly difficult as myself and my brother have little children at school and nursery, so they almost always have some sort of cold.

Additionally, they are constantly googling symptoms and will become sure they are having a stroke / heart attack / cancer and are constantly either at the GP or are at A&E. Even when they are told they don’t have such and such an illness, they will then demand to see NHS consultants or will pay thousands privately to see doctors and specialists.

They cancel plans and meet ups at the last minute, sometimes they just don’t turn up and they don’t even bother telling me at all, until I phone them or speak to my brother and find out they are in A&E again because my dad thinks he’s having a heart attack.

They also wear masks everywhere and are obsessive about hand sanitising.

They’ve now said they aren’t sure about coming for Christmas as my youngest daughter, who is 3, has a cold and they are convinced it might be the new strain of super flu. I’ve already paid for everything and told DH’s family they can’t come as it’s my parents turn this year, so it’s especially maddening.

Is this just a normal part of aging and everyone’s parents get to this stage or is something else going on?

Thank you, yes it was just frustrating as as a family on my mums side all the sisters that died and her mum all did of heart attacks, but they just didnt check what they needed to until it was to late. But people use to say it about my mum oh you’ve always go something wrong with you etc, your fine and then it happened. X

Hello, couple in their 60s (well half of the couple anyway). Some interesting comments here. So yeah, at a certain age I guess you realise that, statistically, you're likely to have less years left than you've lived.

So that might explain fear around illness potentially shortening those remaining years further.
However, I suspect as others have said, the problem here is that human beings in general need to be mentally challenged and to have a purpose. With the early retirement, those aspects have apparently abruptly come to an end.

The advice is oft stated that retirement should not only include plans for financial security, but for activity which will perpetuate mental, physical and intellectual stimulation.

What happens when that is absent? A void, lots of thinking such as what is the point of me, which leads to further fear.

Add that to association with those who are somewhat older, and that mindset rubs off too. The number of people I know/have known who don't have these pessimistic thoughts all have the attitude of needing to have a 'project' (goal, hobby, challenge etc) that does 'project' (pun intended) into the future.

Personally, I get an annual MOT, have no intention of fully retiring, and when I do get any annoying symptoms that could be attributed to age, use the internet to research how to fix those problems (resistance training, Pilates, yoga, regularly detoxing, for example).

Keep learning. Travel. The meaning of life, ultimately, is to enjoy it if we are privileged enough to be in the position to have the resources to do so.

If they are retired with little other purpose going on in their lives it will consume them. A purpose might be to do a two mile charity walk or pay a visit to museums or a short trip abroad or volunteering if they are fit. The brain needs something to make it look outwardly.