DS dating a “influencer”, to think we just need to bite our tongues

[Thatsnotmyjobtoday]

DS is 26, normal job, normal life, very happy. He is currently in the early stages of a new relationship and his girlfriends job is social media, YouTube mostly but also TikTok etc. she seems to earn well from it and does mostly travel/experience content.
Personally I don’t really rate social media creators as a career but I understand some do very well from it, she seems like an intelligent girl, has a degree etc.
DH has much stronger views and thinks it’s idiotic and suggests a low IQ. He is adamant we need to ward DS off the girl. I think that would be futile, in my experience expressing discontent with an adult DCs decisions tends to only lead to them going further in on it.
I do have concerns they he might get tempted into the social media world or that her travel heavy lifestyle will make maintaining the relationship difficult, but I also think that is not our problem and DS will just have to navigate it if it comes up.
DH on the other hand is under the opinion that him being an adult doesn’t mean we aren’t his parents and a word of caution/advice is our duty in this situation.

Im worried DH is going to say something over Christmas (they aren’t spending it together but DS is coming home) and it’s going to result in an argument. Right now I’d say DS is in the smitten and doting phase so even if we did offer our opinions (which I don’t think we should) I doubt he’d listen as obviously she’s the best thing since sliced bread right now. I also worry we might not actually be qualified to comment as we aren’t part of the social media generation so have limited understanding on how it actually works.

AIBU to say we just need to bite our tongues, not rock the boat and see where it goes?

Honestly say nothing. She’s self employed with an income. Honestly pick your battles.
It sounds like she’s got a solid base of a degree. Careers change and develop. In a few years she may want to do something else. I bought dd some packing cubes for Christmas off a travel influencer who now has her own business selling accessories, it’s all marketing just moving with the times. If the girlfriend worked in marketing for Aldi I’m sure he’d not have said a thing yet she could be doing exactly same thing putting content on sm.

As I said upthread influencers actually have great transferable skills.

I’m currently doing some traveling over the next few months and considering starting a blog. Maybe YouTube and Instagram too.

I’d love to get paid for writing travel articles or making reels about my visits and having my hotel stays paid for! 😍 For those who achieve that - all power to them.

I know of a lifestyle/plus size influencer who has been making 6 figures over the last few years. She’s only 27 as well and has been posting since she was around 20. Even if it does dry up in a few years, if she’s financially sensible she will have a lot saved up to buy a house or whatever and can move onto something else like managing social media for a business.

Do you read literary novels ?

So learning to research, write a script, film and video edit etc is not training?

There are people who make a living from these videos and what you would consider rubbish.

There's someone who I used to watch, she used to make millions of dollars but she hasn't made a video in 5 1/2 years but due to her videos still being on youtube, she still makes probably $100k per year. For doing absolutely nothing, in the past 5 1/2 years her only internet presence was when her now husband showed 4 or 5 photos from their wedding.

You're absolutely right that you should zip it, but it sounds like your DH is definitely going to say his piece, however unqualified he is to talk about it. So I'd be thinking of peacekeeping strategies to cushion the fall out when he does. This might be your future daughter in law, after all...

Money for nothing ? Are you saying that's a good thing.

I think asking about your jobs is relevant. If you are both in very steady jobs eg I’m a band 8 I get paid this and put this in my pension each month being self employed is very alien to you.
I doubt your adult son will come back home readily if your husband is a prat with her.

Ah OP I don't think you are being judgemental in a horrible way, it's just a line of work you don't fully understand which you have admitted.
I wouldn't worry too much I'm sure your Son will be fine, it is his life to live and as other's have said it may well fizzle out but in the meantime, get to know her and how her job works etc.

I didnt say it's ALL rubbish. You didnt read my posts properly.

It’s attracting viewers to YouTube so yes they will and should still be getting paid by YouTube for people continuing to consume her content.

It’s a similar idea to authors or music artists getting royalties when people continue to buy their books or stream their music.

So I wouldn’t quite describe it as “money for nothing”

Why is it not a ‘good thing’ to earn a passive income from work you’ve already done?

Do you think it’s morally wrong for songwriters to earn royalties for music? Or for directors to earn royalties from films? Or for writers to earn royalties from additional print runs of books?

Im trying to understand what you think is the issue with passive income from work someone has previously done?

it’s not for nothing it’s for your past effort and making residuals off past content is not something exclusive to social media. It’s an entirely good thing.

Of course it is, it's called a passive income. She filmed and uploaded and video every single week for approximately 10 years and is now feeling the benefits of that. She could also make a video next week and make hundreds of thousands/millions of dollars per year again.

Are you saying a career is only valid if you slog away at it constantly? If I could make a fortune without working then I absolutely would.

Influencers are the new reality stars, who in turn were the new rock/popstars. Youngsters who want fame have always sought it in one way or another, it’s just that times have changed. Some are successful, some aren’t. Some are successful within particular niches.

Anyway, I do think to be successful you have to work incredibly hard if you’re making it full time. It’s not something that’ll last forever, but if she’s earning from it now and she’s educated, she’s obviously clever and it’ll probably open her up to plenty of future opportunities if she’s savvy.

Let him be happy, he’s old enough to make his own life choices and your DH is just going to have to bite his tongue.

there are far worse things out there to be above being an influencer!

@thornbury
Rethink her job as content creator, not influencer, and give her the credit she deserves for building her own business and financial independence.

I couldn't agree more.

‘Money for nothing’? What, like a pension you mean? Where you do stuff for years, pay your dues, and then retire and get an income without having to work any more? Bring it on!!

No it is not

What about this isn’t a career?

Early on they will do everything themselves - filming, editing, writing, speaking to brands etc. They are learning content creation but also marketing, negotiation and analytics (you need to get familiar with these to engage and retain brand deals) too.

Mid career once an audience and a reputation are established they can build relationships and income from brand partnerships, ads, affiliate links, working with independent businesses / established brands / tourism boards etc, speaking opportunities and as profitability grows choose to outsource some editing and other time consuming elements to other pros so they can focus on the bits they do want to do.

Long term they might choose to travel less and pivot to consultancy for travel brands (increasingly brands are paying content creators not just to make content but to offer their expertise on what content resonates in their niche), licensing content, creating merch, launching curated travel experiences and meet ups for followers…

Or long term they might decide that being the face of content isn’t what they want or isn’t compatible with their lifestyle (if they don’t want to juggle that with kids for example) and move into editing and production of content. Would you say being a TV editor wasn’t a career? Of course not.

Theres just as much earning and career laddering potential for a content creator (one who is making a living from it already in this case) with an entrepreneurial spirit as there is for a physio or someone who works in pharma (using OP and her husband’s jobs as examples). Arguably more, in fact.

she purports to live as a 'nomad' yet her last reels were sponsored by Visa

Those two things are COMPLETELY unrelated though... thats like says 'my friend is disingenuous because she lives in a Bungalow but we know she works at HSBC'.

Digital nomads are employed and sponsored by actual companies, thats literally how nomad life works.

Of course it’s a career, it’s not 1950.

Fair enough

Who on earth wouldn’t think it is a good thing. It’s no different to royalties on pop songs.

This thread is eye-opening.

Where do people think the content on YouTube, Instagram and TikTok comes from? When people say they hate influencers, what I suspect they really mean is, people that talk to camera about skin cream.

But every home renovation journey, every 'how to make £5 feed 4 people for 2 days at Aldi' video, every travel vlogger is an influencer. They work hard, and if they're doing well out of it, they're very good at it.

The entertainment landscape has completely changed. Social channels are today's equivalent of television. And yes, there's a lot of dross. Just like you'll find on the Hallmark channel at 2am. There's good content and bad content.

I'd judge a bad content creator. But not content creation as a job, in and of itself. Especially in this job market. Salute her for her creative and entrepreneurial skills, her motivation, her ability to support herself.

The poster is just jealous. They see sponsored by visa and think god she’s making loads, and for some reason thinks that means she can’t live normally. It only makes sense if living normally to the person means living skint.

Yes it is - and I say that as an expert in the labour market and employability trends