DS dating a “influencer”, to think we just need to bite our tongues

[Thatsnotmyjobtoday]

DS is 26, normal job, normal life, very happy. He is currently in the early stages of a new relationship and his girlfriends job is social media, YouTube mostly but also TikTok etc. she seems to earn well from it and does mostly travel/experience content.
Personally I don’t really rate social media creators as a career but I understand some do very well from it, she seems like an intelligent girl, has a degree etc.
DH has much stronger views and thinks it’s idiotic and suggests a low IQ. He is adamant we need to ward DS off the girl. I think that would be futile, in my experience expressing discontent with an adult DCs decisions tends to only lead to them going further in on it.
I do have concerns they he might get tempted into the social media world or that her travel heavy lifestyle will make maintaining the relationship difficult, but I also think that is not our problem and DS will just have to navigate it if it comes up.
DH on the other hand is under the opinion that him being an adult doesn’t mean we aren’t his parents and a word of caution/advice is our duty in this situation.

Im worried DH is going to say something over Christmas (they aren’t spending it together but DS is coming home) and it’s going to result in an argument. Right now I’d say DS is in the smitten and doting phase so even if we did offer our opinions (which I don’t think we should) I doubt he’d listen as obviously she’s the best thing since sliced bread right now. I also worry we might not actually be qualified to comment as we aren’t part of the social media generation so have limited understanding on how it actually works.

AIBU to say we just need to bite our tongues, not rock the boat and see where it goes?

WTAF! Your son is 26 and can date who the hell he likes. How bloody judgemental saying she has a low IQ because she is an influencer. Actually you need to have some brains to do it. To find your niche, your audience and your content. Finding out what works and what doesn't and its more difficult that people imagine it is.

Good for her!! If my DD wanted to quit her 'normal' job to be a full time influencer then I would back her all the way. And in no way would it ruin her life or her prospects for the future.

If your DH doesn't stop with his judging and raises this with his son be prepared for this to damage your relationship with him.

I think you both need to wind your necks in and leave your son to make his own life choices.

Clever girl.
It's really difficult to just apply for a job in the traditional way (many many posts on here attest to that).

Having a niche brand, being articulate and a good communicator could lead to....well, lots of things. Travel journalist/writing/PR/anthropological research/location scout, to name a few.

Having an authentic voice and an audience on SM is very attractive to recruiters/publishers/TV/creative industries.

I’m getting strong Martin from Ever Decreasing Circles vibes.

I think you are right it can be quite precarious as a long-term career even though it can also be lucrative but you are also right not to say anything!! Firstly, she sounds charming, entrepreneurial and hard working so why would you want to put your son off her - hard to find those qualities in life and they should serve her well in other roles as well. Secondly, he's an adult and the only likely outcome of you saying something is to drive him away.

So her job involves travelling the world with free tickets and probably getting lots of other nice things for free, DH works in pharmaceuticals... and he thinks she is the one with low IQ?

Even if she did have a low iq (very unlikely if she has a degree and making a successful if being an influencer) As long as she is a decent person and treats your son well it shouldn't matter. Your dh sounds very shallow and judgemental.

It's the modern equivalent of a travel writer, nothing wrong with it.

Every job today is precarious and unsecure. If anything I would say she has more control over her job security than someone working in an office environment. Her channels will grow and no one is going to call her in one morning to tell her she’s being made redundant.

And what with Patreon channels and sponsorships she could be raking it in.

Noooo do not say anything! Sounds like your 26 yr old son has a charismatic hot new gf. Good for him, enjoy!

Your DH sounds very unpleasant. If professional content creators are paying their taxes and not doing anything illegal, then who are they hurting? Does he look down on many jobs?

I am going to ignore the majority of your post and focus on one line "DH has much stronger views and thinks it’s idiotic and suggests a low IQ".

While I would absolutely agree that there are a lot of "influencers" out there who are self absorbed, entitled wankers that doesn't mean they all are and to tarnish everyone with the same brush is frankly idiotic and suggests a low IQ.

Think about it from this perspective.....

If you could make a very nice living earning significantly above the average salary and in return you got to travel the world staying in some of the best hotels and nicest destinations worldwide, you were your own boss with no one to report to, managed your own time, did what you wanted.... OR you turn up to an office 5 days a week, knock your pipe out for a boss sulk that you only get 1 holiday a year, wish you had more sun, could take more time off....

Who is the idiot there?

Influencer doesn't instantly mean negative. Genuine successful influencers (who remain grounded and nice people) are great successful entrepreneurs. It is the ones who half arse it (or become self absorbed wankers) who tarnish the rest.

It just sounds like the modern equivalent of being a travel journalist/writer, most of whom would probably have been freelance back in the day so no less precarious.

Sounds like an amazing career to me, with huge possibilities and opportunities, and I’m in my 60s. All the years I sat at desk jobs or breaking my back in more physical jobs when I could have been travelling and making my own channel about it, it’s a no-brainer.

Well done her!!👏🏻

Why is a 26 year old man dating a "girl"? Surely this is an adult woman you're talking about?

Travel influencer it a pretty cool job IMO, I follow a few and I'm in my 50's. There are some really amazing ones out there, Karl Watson had a 'real job' as a video editor and makes some very polished stuff, he also sells tours with one of the tour companies and then films the tours as well.

I also like Chris and Carol from Jumping Places who have been doing it full time for around 7 years now and Paddy Doyle who gave up teaching to go full time. The other ones i watch a lot are Dabble and Travel, Molly and Matt who worked as customer service/postman before they started travelling full time - got to be an improvement I'd have thought.

Well, it's relevant because you're being hugely judgemental about other careers.

I’m no spring chicken by any means but I don’t mind some of the YouTube content especially where people show part of their day with shopping, eating or craft. It can be quite addictive! I think if someone has time and energy to do it then why not go for it, it certainly is entertaining. The relationship sounds fairly new so it may not last anyway.

You know that some influencers earn upwards of £30,000 a month right? Especially on YouTube. Good on her.

It’s none of your business who your son dates, be supportive and impartial.

Plus, with all her global networking opportunities, she probably won't hang around for long, so come Christmas, your parochial DH can spare the duffer speech.

Wheres the longevity?
I know someone's daughter who's getting paid for lounging over cars with her tits out. Success is measured by the fact she has a pink car wrap.
Doubt she'll still be doing that in her 50's.

Your DH is a prick.

The level of ignorance about what ‘influencing’ means is insane on Mumsnet. It’s essentially a freelance creative marketing/PR job. Anyone who makes a living out of it is a) canny, b) talented/skilled and c) hardworking and self-motivated.

Hopefully they’ve been sensible with their earnings. What are people who have worked in insurance for twenty years going to do when they’re made redundant and there’s not enough jobs to go round - probably start a YouTube channel on dealing with redundancy in their forties.

Girl in the dictionary:

noun

1. a female child or adolescent.
2. a young or relatively young woman.

It honestly doesn't have to mean that they're 5 years old, I don't understand why MN is so obsessed with 'girl' only meaning child. Women often refer to their group of friends as 'the girls'.

Pop her channel in this search, x2 the earnings for being UK-based and see what she's earning from ad revenue alone; she will also be making sponsorship deals along with those free tickets. shes self employed, and if she is making it in that industry, she is very unlikely to be dumb.

https://socialblade.com/

Would your DH also say that working in television is idiotic and suggests a low IQ ? If not asks how it differs