Dreading team build day but don’t think I can not attend

[Oldtown2]

I work in a fairly small team, there’s only 7 of us.

On Thursday, it’s long been planned that there’s a team build day during working hours followed by our Christmas social.

The team build is offsite, some planning etc first thing and then a couple of activities. One of these activities is a sort of outdoor sauna thing (I think there’s ice baths etc too).

I am absolutely dreading this because I don’t want my colleagues to see me in my swimwear. I have had two children in quick succession and am still much bigger than I was before (I got as big as size 18 and am trying to get back towards my normal 12 but it’s a long process).

The problem is that this is during work hours so not really optional. All my colleagues today were going on about how excited they are for it and I was sat there trying to keep a smile on my face.

AIBU to refuse to do this, or fake a headache on the afternoon? I know I’m probably over thinking things but I can’t describe how anxious I feel.

You forgot the part about that being your opinion? How can you categorically say I gave bad advice? Pushing your own boundaries can be a real positive in life. Giving into your fears and self consciousness isn’t always good for people.

But you’re entitled to your view - as am I.

Gosh this is ridiculous. I don't mind my body but I would feel uncomfortable doing this sort of thing with colleagues it's not appropriate and they should know a huge number of people wouldn't want to do it. I'm so surprised management have signed it off. I think just say you're not comfortable, you'll probably find there are others not wanting to be the first to speak out but who feel the same. If the aim is to provide a chance for staff to relax say you'll get a cuppa and read your book or have a sound bath or something instead.

That is such a weird Team day.

I would call in sick but I’d say sick bug rather than a headache.

I’d go but just say I’m not doing that. I’m old and grumpy though so I don’t care what anyone thinks

Here is a strategy that I have used to get out of boozy Christmas parties at work…

Be positive , enthuse over the event, you are buying a new outfit for the occasion, you are arranging your life around it. etc, etc. Make sure plenty of people get positive feels from you regarding the event. Absolutely nothing questioning any aspect of the event.

Then you are absolutely gutted when, at the last moment something comes up that prevents you from attending… childcare fell through, boiler broke, grannie in hospital etc.

or just say you are not doing it?

This is all that needs to be said.

I certainly wouldn't do it.

Nah, fuck that.

Just say no.

Please can we have an update OP or are you otherwise engaged flaunting your semi naked body with your colleagues?

Bumping for an update please @Oldtown2