Would it bother you if one person wasn’t drinking at Christmas?

[wakinginthenight]

Dh and I do like to have a few drinks at Christmas and enjoy ourselves.
We are having Christmas at home just family and we all intend to have a good amount of drink, play a few silly party games, music and just let our hair down because it’s Christmas but there is one person who’ll be coming who has requested alcohol free beer as he’s not drinking.
He does drink, he’s just decided he won’t on this occasion.
I feel a bit miffed to be honest that we are all going to be drinking and one sober person will be sitting there watching.
I know IABU but I really wish they would not come if they are just going to sit there and remember everything, I don’t think it helps that they will be here all day and all night.

Nobody hates him but no we DID NOT invite him and DO NOT want him to come.

The reason is that we have made other plans between ourselves this year and he has disrupted that.

How is him inviting himself to our house to be fed and tell me what drink to buy him, more entitled than us wanting to spend Christmas how we choose in our own home?

We’ve already had to change all the food plans because we originally planned on doing a party/finger food buffet that the kids wanted now we have to have a sit down roast because he wouldn’t eat that and now we can’t have a drink either and yes I am pissed off and I ranted on here to save saying it to his face, if he’d been invited I would have happily been more accommodating but we he wasn’t and we I resent our plans being scuppered.

All of the above (by the OP) suggests she absolutely cannot stand her step-son. Never mind dislike him.

This is actually really unpleasant and sad to read.

He has disrupted your plans? He has "invited himself" to YOUR house?

This is your husband's CHILD you selfish cow.

Does she explicitly say, "I don't like my step son"?

No.

Is every single post riddled with dislike for him? 100% yes.

Most parents with boundaries would not be saying what? I am a parent, I have boundaries, if my husband's step-son wanted to come over at Christmas, adult or otherwise, then that's what would happen. Because Christmas is about all the family, not just the parts that are ok with you getting 'shitfaced in your own house'. He is her husband's son. If he isn't welcome at Christmas - then clearly she doesn't like him.

I do agree though that the OP should continue as planned and ignore his attitude.

This.
It's not much fun being a none drinker watching piss heads get more and more ridiculous because they can't have a good time without being pissed.

Lots of people don’t need a drink to have a personality.

Maybe he's pregnant

Lots but not all. Those who do get a strange dislike and annoyance at those who don’t want a drink, especially if it interferes with their plans for getting hammered.

What a stupid attitude you dont have to drink to have fun

I think it’s weird that you were actively planning on getting drunk at a Christmas with your children, regardless of step son. What were your plans for your kids while you and their dad were drunk?

Really weird if they actually do drink?! I was going to say, maybe they've had issues with alcohol etc, but if they drink on other occasions, it's odd! 🤣🤣🤣

Going to sit there and remember everything? So basically no one can have a good time unless they are plastered?

I’m not teetotal but I still ordered non-alcoholic beer for myself in my online Christmas shop. Not weird at all.

Yes ok, but they've stated they do drink. That was my point.

I’ve never heard anyone say all when referring to just them and their partner, in any context. Were you originally planning on having others over before you knew your ss was coming?

Maybe he realises someone has to be sober when there’s children in the house?

Who knows. I don't drink personally, so I wouldn't be in that situation. Guess I shouldn't have commented.

I’m just wondering what is worth remembering?

Drink just makes me sleep so the only thing anyone would remember with me is probably me snoring. I’ve never been a ‘dancing on the tables waving my knickers in the air’ type drinker 😁 (Although I used to have a friend who was, many year’s ago 🫣).

If her husband showed boundaries towards his son the op wouldn't feel like that. She has posted that he feels the same as well. Her husband needs to man up and not hide the drink. Is he scared of his son?

If you can’t enjoy Christmas without alcohol you have a problem.

Could be anything. Maybe he's giving someone a lift home later, or going off to see a girlfriend. Maybe he's working the next day. Maybe he's planning to do coke instead. Maybe he's become a Buddhist.

It doesn't really matter. I feel sad for him being so obviously unwanted. If you're in the north west OP tell him he can come to mine!

They want to drink what's wrong with that.

Oh well I plan on getting fucked this Christmas

What they hell are you planning on doing that you don't want anyone to remember?😂

Why oh why do people 1) ask 'AIBU?' when they've clearly already made their minds up that they're not, and 2) omit loads of obviously relevant information from the first post?

After your first few posts OP I thought you sounded like a raging alky and were indeed being unreasonable, but having now read all your posts it's pretty clear the not drinking thing is a bit of a side issue. The main thing is that you'll be spending Christmas day with one invited guest who is a fun sponge and who you don't like anyway, which is fair enough to be annoyed about.

Good for you. Are you planning to have a drink as well? 😉😂