Page 21 | Would it bother you if one person wasn’t drinking at Christmas?

Laserwho · 15/12/2025 12:41

wakinginthenight · 15/12/2025 12:17

We don’t want to host, we are staying home this year and just having a few drinks ourselves.
We made our plans and then he told us he was coming, now we’re not very good hosts?

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Why didn't you invite him to begin with? He is one of the children.

TinselTitts · 15/12/2025 12:42

BestintheWest · 15/12/2025 12:39

I agree. People are being horrible. The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

True we don’t know the full detail. But it sounds like the crossover of two worlds. The step sons world with theirs. They want him to taste their world and their version of fun and he doesn’t want to be involved. Just be there, not to participate as it sounds like he normally would if it were a different couple he was spending time with. Maybe he’s worse than OP is letting on. Maybe his mum is a nightmare and is sending him there for something to gossip about

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The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

Sorry what?

Most people on this thread are struggling to understand which of her posts are real and honest, because she's constantly changing them.

ThatOpenTraybake · 15/12/2025 12:43

justpassmethemouse · 15/12/2025 12:36

I understand where you’re coming from OP. It’s like you as a group have agreed to put yourselves in a “lowered inhibitions” state, and when one person hasn’t made that agreement it changes the dynamic slightly.

You didn't read the thread did you?

tuvamoodyson · 15/12/2025 12:43

wakinginthenight · 15/12/2025 09:31

I can have the opinion that I’d rather not have someone in my home sitting there as a spectator.
I’m entitled to feel uncomfortable about their presence in those circumstances.

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Then why are you asking find you’re being unreasonable!?

cocobanana922 · 15/12/2025 12:44

We get it OP, we get it. You hate your step son, you did NOT invite him and do NOT want him there.

ThatOpenTraybake · 15/12/2025 12:44

BestintheWest · 15/12/2025 12:39

I agree. People are being horrible. The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

True we don’t know the full detail. But it sounds like the crossover of two worlds. The step sons world with theirs. They want him to taste their world and their version of fun and he doesn’t want to be involved. Just be there, not to participate as it sounds like he normally would if it were a different couple he was spending time with. Maybe he’s worse than OP is letting on. Maybe his mum is a nightmare and is sending him there for something to gossip about

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What over-emotional BS is this?

Did you actually read the thread?

Itsallsostressful · 15/12/2025 12:44

You obviously don't see your step son as family OP otherwise it wouldn't be about hosting it would just be son joining you.
Just own that you don't want him there and you just want your wee family unit.

Thepeopleversuswork · 15/12/2025 12:45

@BestintheWest

I agree. People are being horrible. The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

That's such a cop-out. That's like the bullshit excuse from people who claim they "tell it like it is" and then go on to be incredibly offensive.

Let's be honest: people are being horrible to the OP because she's being absolutely toxic to her husband's son. She's moaning about the fact that she will have to curtail her drinking because his son is joining them.

She's moaning about the fact that he disapproves of the amount they drink, without thinking to ask why that could be.

She's been called on being an arsehole to her husband's son and is trying to backtrack by saying she just wanted a "chill" day.

The OP is a nasty piece of work and is trying to exclude the one member of her family who is not her biological child because she wants to get pissed.

She can get rat-arse pissed if she wants, but she can manage to keep her husband's son away from it, and she's moaning about that.

ByWisePanda · 15/12/2025 12:46

ThatOpenTraybake · 15/12/2025 12:44

What over-emotional BS is this?

Did you actually read the thread?

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She probably did and decided not to be a cunt to the op and empathised with her.

ComfortFoodCafe · 15/12/2025 12:46

wakinginthenight · 15/12/2025 12:24

We plan on us all drinking, not one person just turning up to judge.
Good grief no wonder people do turn to drink.

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Don’t worry about it your kids will be judging you, they might be small now but it doesn’t take long for them to grow up and remember their parents care more about getting shitfaced than their christmas with their kids. Shame on you.

luckylavender · 15/12/2025 12:47

wakinginthenight · 15/12/2025 09:28

Dh and I do like to have a few drinks at Christmas and enjoy ourselves.
We are having Christmas at home just family and we all intend to have a good amount of drink, play a few silly party games, music and just let our hair down because it’s Christmas but there is one person who’ll be coming who has requested alcohol free beer as he’s not drinking.
He does drink, he’s just decided he won’t on this occasion.
I feel a bit miffed to be honest that we are all going to be drinking and one sober person will be sitting there watching.
I know IABU but I really wish they would not come if they are just going to sit there and remember everything, I don’t think it helps that they will be here all day and all night.

That reflects badly on you not him. You don't need to be drunk to have a good time. Poor bloke.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 15/12/2025 12:47

BestintheWest · 15/12/2025 12:39

I agree. People are being horrible. The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

True we don’t know the full detail. But it sounds like the crossover of two worlds. The step sons world with theirs. They want him to taste their world and their version of fun and he doesn’t want to be involved. Just be there, not to participate as it sounds like he normally would if it were a different couple he was spending time with. Maybe he’s worse than OP is letting on. Maybe his mum is a nightmare and is sending him there for something to gossip about

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The OP has been an idiot and done an epic dripfeed, when people do this it's v hard for anyone to offer advice given the changing goalposts.

Given she's actually taking about her stepson, the obvious solution is - his Dad tells him to join in the games as part of the deal, the OP sucks up the fact she might not be able to get as mashed as she'd like, as families are about compromise. Next year he can go to his mums. This year OP and DH can get proper drunk some other night. The OP may (or may not) also need to consider her relationship with binge drinking around kids, as it's a bit mystifying that she's worrying he'll 'remember things'.

Fionasapples · 15/12/2025 12:48

I don't drink because I don't like any alcoholic drinks and I don't like how alcohol makes me feel. I don't need alcohol to make me have fun either. I really object to people (some in my wider family) who try to encourage me to drink. Why? In what way does it affect them whether I drink or not? I have realised that they are insecure about the amount they drink and if everyone drinks, they don't feel as bad about their drinking. That might possibly be your problem too, op.

RandomUserName96 · 15/12/2025 12:48

wakinginthenight · 15/12/2025 10:58

I didn’t say there was a load of people I said it’s just family.
It will be Dh and I and our small children who will be drinking soft drinks because they are primary school age. However they will not be disapproving if Dh and I should have a few drinks and get ever so slightly tipsy.
I never once said we have a load of people coming, I said he is coming over.

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So you and DH were just going to get shitfaced in front of, and in charge of, your primary aged children...

It keeps getting better

Katiesaidthat · 15/12/2025 12:49

I enjoy my wine and beer, my husband doesn´t drink at all. He isn´t sitting watching (what a weird take), but enjoying his non-alocholic drink and chatting and laughing like the rest of us). Like normal people, all of us?
What a weird post.

ByWisePanda · 15/12/2025 12:50

Thepeopleversuswork · 15/12/2025 12:45

@BestintheWest

I agree. People are being horrible. The OP is a real person voicing something real and honestly.

That's such a cop-out. That's like the bullshit excuse from people who claim they "tell it like it is" and then go on to be incredibly offensive.

Let's be honest: people are being horrible to the OP because she's being absolutely toxic to her husband's son. She's moaning about the fact that she will have to curtail her drinking because his son is joining them.

She's moaning about the fact that he disapproves of the amount they drink, without thinking to ask why that could be.

She's been called on being an arsehole to her husband's son and is trying to backtrack by saying she just wanted a "chill" day.

The OP is a nasty piece of work and is trying to exclude the one member of her family who is not her biological child because she wants to get pissed.

She can get rat-arse pissed if she wants, but she can manage to keep her husband's son away from it, and she's moaning about that.

Her 25 year old step son. Come on he's an adult the op and her husband should not hide away the drink that's ridiculous. People should be telling her to enjoy their day with or without drink. He will be drinking one day.

Laserwho · 15/12/2025 12:50

I imagine your stepson wants to keep an eye on HIS little siblings while you get shit faced. Good on him.

RaininSummer · 15/12/2025 12:52

Why won't they be joining in or are your entertainments too crass or ridiculous to do unless absolutely trollied?

ThatOpenTraybake · 15/12/2025 12:52

ByWisePanda · 15/12/2025 12:46

She probably did and decided not to be a cunt to the op and empathised with her.

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It's really possible to not be a cunt without resorting to faux-psychoanalysis.

And i don't believe anyone who has seen the 180 that OP did aka read the thread would post that.

HoorayHettie · 15/12/2025 12:52

ByWisePanda · 15/12/2025 12:50

Her 25 year old step son. Come on he's an adult the op and her husband should not hide away the drink that's ridiculous. People should be telling her to enjoy their day with or without drink. He will be drinking one day.

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Have you read the OP's post where she says she has primary school aged children. So all the drink-related behaviour that she doesn't want DSS to witness sober will be witnessed by her young children . . . . . .

HoppingPavlova · 15/12/2025 12:53

I feel a bit miffed to be honest that we are all going to be drinking and one sober person will be sitting there watching

What on earth is wrong with you? I drink. DH drinks. We have both friends and (adult) kids who don’t drink. Who gives a shit what others do in this sense? We certainly don’t expect anyone to drink whether they are drinkers or not.

outerspacepotato · 15/12/2025 12:53

I feel a bit miffed to be honest that we are all going to be drinking and one sober person will be sitting there watching.

Sober people piss you off? That's weird as fuck. And it's your stepson?

Well, stay mad then.

ByWisePanda · 15/12/2025 13:03

HoorayHettie · 15/12/2025 12:52

Have you read the OP's post where she says she has primary school aged children. So all the drink-related behaviour that she doesn't want DSS to witness sober will be witnessed by her young children . . . . . .

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You're posting to the wrong person. I am a mother of 4 children 2 of them are now adults and I will be having a drink on Christmas day. What's your point?

They're having a drink on Christmas day alert social services they are wicked parents how dare they. Are you a nun?

nayals · 15/12/2025 13:03

Ah. So you don’t want him around because he’s your husband’s son and you want to play happy families with just your shared children.

Thepeopleversuswork · 15/12/2025 13:03

@ByWisePanda

Her 25 year old step son. Come on he's an adult the op and her husband should not hide away the drink that's ridiculous. People should be telling her to enjoy their day with or without drink. He will be drinking one day.

Hang on... stop trying to deflect. This isn't about the OP wanting to have a bit of a laugh and not having to hide alcohol in her home.

She doesn't want him over at Christmas because he's not drinking. The whole genesis of this thread was she doesn't want her husband's son (his age is irrelevant) to come over at Christmas because he's not drinking alcohol.

This is peak arsehole behaviour. I can't believe people are actually defending this.