To send this to a married man

[IslaSkywalker]

It's been sent but I'd like to see what people say.

A man who's turned out to be married has been chatting with me and arranging to meet. Also being very flirty and sexual toned in conversation that I did not like and sent unsolicited "pictures." Guess what type.

He's been sent a moonpig postcard telling him to stop flirting and messing around in the new year and not to send pictures of his bits and pieces to women who've not asked.

I can't believe he's only done it the once. I chose a postcard because of the embarrassment factor. The postman will see it and it'd make him look a fool explaining to his wife if she picks it up from the mat.

Not bitter or jealous, he's a complete tool who I don't want. AT ALL.

So he fooled you for a time with pics of his cars and house and you were sucked in. Then, when you found out he was actually married and it was all just a game to him you were hurt. When he said Nice pussy in relation to your cat why didn’t you speak up? When his messages became sexual why didn’t you speak up? You ‘grey rocked’ him. Why? What did you think that would achieve? You have a voice and can tell someone to stop. Even after he sent an offensive picture you decided to put more of your time and energy into stalking him, not to teach him a lesson for the rest of womankind’s sake but because you had your feelings played with and ultimately hurt.

Next time don’t give your number to a stranger and use your bloody voice and words.

What you have done is not something to be applauded. It was cowardly and from the Big girls book of “A woman scorned”.

Ok but do you know for certain it's him you have been speaking to? You havn't met him but have you face timed him? You definitely know this name, face, car, house and business belongs to the person you have been talking to? I know you think that sounds far fetched but seriously its the internet, you could have been speaking to father christmas for all you know

Don't be so ridiculous. Theres looking up info and then contacting someone to their home address with info you've obtained from potentially reverse image searching their house. That's not the same as doing some research for peace of mind or a Claire's law request through the proper channels. Posting something to someone's address .or showing up at their workplace are equally batshit, it doesn't matter if it's advertised online for all to see. Defending OPs actions is reliant on being obtuse it seems.
Let's remember OP doesn't even know that any of the info she has belongs to the dick she saw, it's all completely presumed. Had she contacted the wife on Facebook for example where she's not being creepy and anonymous she would actually be productive and be corrected of she was contacting a total stranger.

Projection?

Are you only on here as OPs little sidekick or something? You're not even making any constructive comments, just little silly digs at anyone picking rational holes in OPs logic.

@Differentforgirlsuse your words lovely. With practice you’ll soon be up to full sentences.

Not bitter

Yes you are

Very good point about Clare's Law.

What do I have to be bitter about, please? And how exactly am I "scorned" @LastNightMyPJsSavedMyLife ?

He deceived you. You have every right to feel aggrieved but don't pretend his behaviour didn't affect you.

I've just 192.com in the past when I've not been sure of someone's address. (DH didn't have the phone number, there were two address books and I didn't know which was the more recent one.)

That's someone you know though! Not someone reverse image searching your address 🫠 loads of Mumsnet posters post links to their house on Rightmove to ask for feedback, it would be absolutely stalkerish for someone who doesn't like that poster to 192 their full address and send them something to their house.

I'm actually gobsmacked that people can't put themselves into other people's shoes and understand there's a massive line crossed between finding information online and then contacting someone using that info especially when it's a total stranger. Actually even if it was someone I knew irl like a colleague, I'd be creeped out if they decided to post something to my home address that they decided to find for themselves on the internet.

Marvellous post! totally sums up all this foolhardiness.

A lot of people don't seem to be aware in this day and age it's very common for folk to be married but have agreements on fun outside the marriage so you had no idea wether it's one of those marriages either and let's hope kids didn't find out because it's spiteful tbh

It annoys me and makes me angry but bitter isn't the word.

You can’t answer then? No worries.

I absolutely LOVE this. These types of men are absolutely the worst. They are so entitled and nasty.

I hope his whole life blows up in his face. Men like this need to be named and shamed into never being able to pass on their DNA.

Ooh 🤣

You’ve just joined and only posted on this thread 🤔

How common?

Answer what?

Is it not a crime sending lewd communications? I'd have reported to the police to be honest.

Yes it is.

I forgot to add swingers or open marriage or poly to the list of potential reasons it wouldn't make a difference!

Would you not mind if this postcard was picked up and read by his children/ stepchildren / parents? They could have mental or physical worries already, it's just before Christmas, why take the risk of their lives being impacted in this way? They are innocent.