DP’s family have uninvited my DLabrador from Christmas

[Hols25]

Feeling a bit pissed off. First Christmas with DP and he invited me to his parents house. They live a few hours away so I haven’t been there before, but have met them once for a meal where we live.

DP knows I have sole custody of my DL following breaking up with my ex last year, and he hates going into kennels. When he asked me about Christmas, I checked about whether DL could join and he said yes.

Fast forward to today and he’s told me his parents aren’t able to accommodate DL. They aren’t really dog people and are worried about their cream carpets.

It turns out he hadn’t actually checked with them before and only spoke to them last night.

This means I can’t go and won’t be spending Christmas with DP or the days either side as he’s travelling the morning before.

He says its just one of those things.

AIBU to feel upset with him?

Surely they can put up with him for one day!
If not, then plan a lovely couple of days at home just you and DLab, which sounds idyllic if I’m honest.

I haven't suggested she try to persuade them to let her bring the dog. I was responding to another poster's suggestion, someone who has evidently never met a dog. My advice was to stay at home with the dog as that is what I would do.

Edit: it was actually your suggestion @FlyingApple

I’d dump him OP. Thoughtless and careless, you can do better. I’d dump him on Xmas day, but only after you’ve had your present from him. Call it a Xmas carelessness tax, for causing you to be on your own.

This!

the dog will survive

otherwise you’ll be miserable

Better than my Dad is though.

They also don't get drunk, give shitty gifts, act like nobs about the gifts they're given, eat their dinners gratefully and with enthusiasm and are a lot less likely to start a family feud that lasts until August.

But seriously - did you not read the OP's first post at all. She didn't expect an invite. She was given an invite, by her partner. She was not to know it wasn't actually an invite at all!

They are rather large dogs though OP

I would t want it and I have two myself

My main problem would be what he has told his parents. If he hasn't come clean with them about his part in this, they are just going to think you have cancelled coming. There'll be another thread on here soon, DIL has cancelled coming to us at Xmas. If he told them you'd said yes,and are now saying no 3 weeks before Xmas,because your dog can't come when they had no idea that was the plan, it looks a bit rude.

Are you sure your DP has been honest with them - in fact, can he ring them while you're there, so you can hear him say, Mum I have totally messed up here. Hols25 explained to me months ago that she could only come if the dog could come along, because there are no nice kennels near us for him. I told her it was fine without asking you... etc

This may be so, but as a non dog owner, there is no way I would want a dog in my house! On a separate note, I do feel for you as you thought it was ok to take your dog and now you can’t. Sorry to hear that.

Do try to read PPs posts, there have been a few explaining why this thinking is bollocks.

The end result is still the same. DL can't go so you can't go.

DP... well yes he should have asked before saying yes without checking but he's told you now and you haven't turned down any better offers.

How long have you been together? I'd be pissed off at being left alone by a long term boyfriend but if you've not been together long (and you don't love together) it doesn't sound like you're there yet.

MN is really the home of misanthropes. Forget drooling dogs; the number of posters here drooling over the prospect of spending Christmas alone with a dog and away from OtHeR PeOpLe is quite amusing.

Well I have met a dog but at this point, I'll leave it there with you.

As it’s his cock up im surprised he’s not coming to you instead

he’s not very loyal

doga much more loyal 🥰🥰

Your dp messed up. You have only been together a short while and he is happy for you to spend Christmas alone. How are you feeling about that op that is the bigger issue. I think dp is your problem not his parents. He has left it very late for you to organise other options even if you wanted to visit friends locally they are probably now busy. I would feel quite let down in your position.

I have read the posts up to when I made that comment and it’s perfectly reasonable

don’t be so b cheeky!

don’t police others posts - just stick to your own!

As a dog owner I 100% agree.

There is not a chance I'd expect to take a labrador to someone else's house for Christmas day so either book accommodation nearby and leave it alone for a few hours or book kennels at home, mind you've left it too late for that probably.

People who don't have dogs do not want to accommodate ours.

This, I thought was long standing relationship not a less than 6 monther!

I'd choose snuggling up with my devoted dog at home over family dinner with a new boyfriend who has crappy communication skills.

Pomeranians. I have never met any who smells. I think it's the type of fur.

Is rather stay home with Dlab than spend Xmas day with strangers. It’s a new relationship so doggy would come first.

I really don’t think that dogs imagine what their owners are doing and that makes them sadder!

he will survive a night in a kennel

What about a pet sitter OP? Have you looked on Rover.com?

I suspect that if you can't face leaving your dog in a kennels for a couple of nights, very occasionally, many men won't see you as good marriage material. What a bind!

Could you just keep DL on the D/L and reveal it like a parcel from DhL on the D/ay?

His family haven uninvited your dog, though-have they?