To have expected him to make sure I got home ok?

[Muffinmoo]

First date last night with a guy who spent most of the evening telling me about how rich he was and all the companies he had owned and sold.

Left the restaurant, freezing outside. I am having trouble getting an uber. He is just standing there watching me struggle to try and book a cab. He suggests I get a black cab. Tell him I can’t really afford it. Eventually I give up and say I will walk to the tube which is about a 5-10 minute walk (I’m in heels). He walks with me part way before leaving me alone at gone midnight to go to his easiest tube stop. I have to walk to the tube in the dark by myself. He could have got the same tube line from the same station as me.
AIBU for expecting him to at least walk me to the tube if not help get me taxi??? Or is that too much these days?! 🙈

He is man so is whatever poster's on here say he is because a op is totally exactly the way situation is with no bias at all

This is extraordinarily rude! Take a look at yourself and be a better human.

Yeah but he didn’t see you as worth those standards

Oh puh-lease.

Of course he should have escorted you at that time of night. I would have asked him to take me the whole way there when he decided to leave. But why couldn't you afford a taxi if you'd been prepared to pay half for your meal but ended up not paying anything? If it's extortionate to get one home, then you could have taken one to the tube. It's not his fault you were poorly dressed and in heels - or that he is better off than you.

He's probably poor.

You didn’t really want him to walk you to the tube though did you, hence the complaints about the distance and heels etc - you wanted him to pay for your cab. Maybe your agonising over the cab fare gave him the ick and he just wanted to get away asap?

But anyway you talk about bar setting - yours is in the wrong place entirely. His bragging about money and business success all night should have been an immediate no thanks from you.

He’s just not that into you.

I’m still confused because even if he walked you to the tube station and left you there, you’d still be on your own to walk home on the other end? There’s no scenario where he’d escort you to your door. Is he someone you knew already? If not you shouldn’t really tell him your address to book an uber anyway.

I agree with several that you sound like hard work. He paid for dinner and you still couldn’t afford a taxi home? You should have had plenty, and you should have had an independent plan on how to get home. I’d be uncomfortable from his perspective if a first date was asking me for more money after I’d already paid for everything so far.

The ‘mildest of standards’ !
I have high standards thanks very much for MYSELF and others. This means that as adult I do not require help hailing or paying for transportation. I am not a child who needs to be taught to dress appropriately for the weather. I even plan my journeys and take steps to ensure my own safety. Good luck finding your sugar daddy.

Jesus Christ, what is wrong with people? He left you on the side of the road at nearly midnight? An utter wanker. Block and don't speak to him again.

And while it might not be mandatory I think he should have tried to help with the cab issue. I always found the men who were really suspicious about getting 'caught out for money' on the first date we're always like that about everything. I am generous and trusting,money flows both ways imo. I pick up the bill, my friend or date picks up the bill, it all evens out over time.

Not sure why people are giving you a hard time. Walking you to the tube isn't asking too much. I guess at least you've found out he's not worth investing any more time in, but I guess it's mutual. If he'd cared at all he would have made sure you were ok.

I am in the he paid for the meal so surely you could have put the money saved towards a black cab. It would have been a nice gesture for him to walk you to the correct tube station, but the hinting about getting him to pay for a cab/uber would annoy me if I had already paid for a meal.

I’ve seen a few threads like this on this forum, where women don’t beleive in equality and have their hands out wanting to be paid for, like it’s the 1950s. But this must be the most extreme, where some can’t walk an extra two mins further in to the tube station, she could probably see it she was that close, and even want their taxi paying for as well as paying for dinner.

no consideration to be given to the man, he is there purely to pay and escort.the woman being completely incapable when in the presence of a man.

I personally find it utterly dismaying.

Yes definitely he should have made sure you got home okay or even offered to pay for black cab.
Dating these days is so hard I'm dreading getting back out there 😫

His tube line runs through her station.

Therefore she walked past a perfectly good opportunity to get on a train in favour of walking further alone.

If safety was her paramount concern and not being ‘abandoned’ she’d have hopped on the tube for 1 stop and changed trains.

So I assume she wasn’t really worried about safety.

Yes I should have taken a longer journey with even more tube changes so that he didn’t have to walk an extra few minutes to come to the station with the line that goes directly to his stop. So inconsiderate of me.

MN really hates it when women have standards and self respect sometimes. It’s so sad to see.

Where were your standards and self respect when the bill came out ? It doesn’t sound like a second date is in the offing so how hard did you try to pay your share ?

if you were worried about safety then you’d have got on the Tube.

Women with self respect pay for the their own taxis OP.

I think not putting plans in place to safely see yourself home shows a lack of self respect actually.

I totally agree that the least he could’ve done was make sure you got to the tube safely, that is just basic manners imo. As far as the not making an effort clothing wise, many men seem to believe their innate charm is enough! Also if he is that well off he is probably used to people fawning over him regardless. Personally that attitude would put me off anyway.

Bit of a reach to say that allowing a man who has invited me to a restaurant of his choice to pay for dinner means I have no self respect.
Men love to harp on about 50:50 when it suits them. Sadly the world is not 50:50.

to those saying it isn’t his ‘responsibility’ to pay, or he wasn’t ‘responsible’ for my choice of heels are missing the point. I never said he was responsible. It’s about basic care and respect. The misogynistic comments on here are wild.

He was actually keen to meet again and I told him leaving me to walk alone late at night wasn’t great and I wasn’t interested. Hopefully he will be a little bit more aware with the next girl.

Yes silly me for not predicting I would not be able to easily get an uber from central London!

I cant believe for one minute you couldnt get an Uber in London. You would have just ordered one from the restaurant and accepted long wait / surge pricing.
High heels and not warm enough clothes is indeed very silly.
Hope you find your knight in shining armor soon 🙄