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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Misunderstood Xmas gift

626 replies

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 10:42

Just for fun, what have you given as a Christmas present that totally fell flat and was misunderstood? My bad idea was a box of luxury crackers. It was some yrs ago, late 80s. Very cheap crackers were the norm and the luxury sort were more of a rarity. So I bought a box for my sister. She and her husband always had friends round on Boxing Day or NY Day, when she pulled out all the stops. The crackers would have graced any table. White with golden ribbons, they looked classy, and the items inside were so much nicer than the usual trinkets. Twice as expensive for half as many, it seemed the sort of thing many would like but would never justify buying. However, my sister decided that since nobody would give anyone crackers, they had to be intended just as packaging, so she proceeded to pull them all one after the other, and ended up with a pile of trinkets, albeit superior trinkets.

That's my best flop, but a close second is giving a friend a metal water bottle because she carried water in an old plastic lemonade bottle. So she now uses the bottle at home when the rest of us use glasses and carries on with her ancient plastic bottles outside.

OP posts:
katseyes7 · 03/12/2025 14:47

'Oh, it's a spaghetti jar.'
The next time the gift giver visited the jar was full of Heinz spaghetti hoops.

Where's the laugh emoji when you need it....

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:48

katseyes7 · 03/12/2025 14:45

oops l misread the original post. I was given, l didn't give. Sorry!

Mine was a secret santa at work.
It was a sex positions book (albeit pretty tastefully photographed) and a jar of chocolate body paint.
I found out later on that the person who gave it to me was the lass l car shared with. Who was well aware that my marriage was in dire straits.
I hid them at home, intending to get rid of them when the binmen came. But my (now ex) husband found them and went mad, accusing me of having an affair. The genuine explanation didn't wash with him.
I was lucky, considering how abusive he was. And the person who gave me the present knew that as well. It could have turned out much worse.

Edited

Oh that's funny and awful in equal measure.

333FionaG · 03/12/2025 14:48

pottylolly · 03/12/2025 14:22

Lol I bought a set of 6 gin crackers for my sister and she proceeded to drink all of them on the spot. I think that was the worst Christmas as she passed out and lost bowel control in the downstairs loo & I had to clean everything up.

How much gin was in each cracker?! The gin crackers I bought contained about a teaspoonful in each, not enough to get anyone remotely sloshed.

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:48

NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

😂I love this! I bet you stank!

peachgreen · 03/12/2025 14:50

I was 7 and went shopping with my dad for a present for my mum. Chose a pair of slippers – purple velvet with gold embroidery and a little heel, I remember them clear as day! –and he said no, she wouldn't want those, and made me get a horrible pair of traditional granny-type slippers that I knew she'd hate. Sure enough, a week after Christmas we're back in the shop and she's exchanging them for THE ONES I PICKED OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. I was raging.

ClassicBBQ · 03/12/2025 14:50

DS was 6 months on his first Christmas. He seemed to like musical toys and teddies, so we bought him Scout the musical puppy toy. It went down so badly! He was absolutely hysterical every time he saw it, and poor Scout ended up at the charity shop by New Year.

BeWellJ · 03/12/2025 14:50

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:34

Didn't bring them. Wasn't Xmas Day. She's way older than me and had left home. She and her husband had a quiet Xmas but had friends in for Boxing Day or New Year every year when she cooked an elaborate meal (she's a brilliant cook) and took pride in making the table look good. I thought posh crackers would have been a nice addition and if she'd had some on Xmas Day they would have been long gone.

I think the fact it wasn't Christmas day makes it a bit better but it's still quite confusing. She buys crackers for her guests so your present to her was something for her to give to someone else...I can see why she didn't immediately twig.

Fionasapples · 03/12/2025 14:52

@Calliopespa that's really funny 😁

MargolyesofBeelzebub · 03/12/2025 14:52

Another recieving one. My mum used to buy me undies for Christmas when I lived at home (lots of other gifts too, she's a very generous mum!). When I was in my mid 20's (having left home) she bought me the most hideous, huge lacy/flowery pairs from M&S and when I opened them I just couldn't contain my giggles. It's the only ever time I've showed any ingratitude for a present, but honestly they were so hideous I couldn't contain my laughter. I'm even cracking up now with the memory 😂I've not received underwear since!

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:52

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:34

Didn't bring them. Wasn't Xmas Day. She's way older than me and had left home. She and her husband had a quiet Xmas but had friends in for Boxing Day or New Year every year when she cooked an elaborate meal (she's a brilliant cook) and took pride in making the table look good. I thought posh crackers would have been a nice addition and if she'd had some on Xmas Day they would have been long gone.

I actually love fancy crackers. Feel free to send me a box of the Fortnum's ones! Well, actually the really OTT ones come in their own wicker hamper.

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:55

Fionasapples · 03/12/2025 14:52

@Calliopespa that's really funny 😁

I was actually rubbed up the wrong way at the time because it was as if he was complaining. But yes, I now see it as funny.

EarringsandLipstick · 03/12/2025 14:56

NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

This is AMAZING! 😂

Mygardenandme · 03/12/2025 14:56

My parents love visiting English heritage places etc so I bought them membership to a scheme that gives you free english heritage memvership and various other freebies and discounts. It's cheaper than just buying an English Heritage pass alone. So even of that's all they used it for, it would still be cheaper. I use the scheme and found it great.

The only proviso is you have to book in advance but you can do that on the morning you're visiting so hardly a big deal. Plus, they are planners and the likelihood of them spontaneously deciding to visit a castle is zero.

But for whatever reason thet just decided they didnt like it. My Dad wouldnt tell me why so I couldn't help. It was a 3yr membership. It was never used.

The Christmas after I gave in and just bought them an English Heritage membership. They were happy with that and used it regularly. But for 2 years they had 2 sets of memberships.

Fionasapples · 03/12/2025 14:56

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:55

I was actually rubbed up the wrong way at the time because it was as if he was complaining. But yes, I now see it as funny.

I can just picture it- panna what? 😂

Aroundthebend · 03/12/2025 14:58

I bought my exH a colonic irrigation voucher for Christmas. When I went to the salon that did them, I asked for a voucher to wrap up and they said they didn’t do vouchers as they had never known them to be bought as a gift!
On Christmas Day I suggested we opened our presents before our parents arrived…he insisted we all opened our presents together… he wasn’t impressed when he did open his as he then had to explain what was involved to his parents!

Pallisers · 03/12/2025 15:01

I bought an electric razor for DH's stocking one year. Turns out it was a special electric razor for trimming your pubes.

AltitudeCheck · 03/12/2025 15:01

I bought my exH a colonic irrigation voucher for Christmas.

Nothing says Happy Christmas like a hose pipe up the bum 😆 I will think of this before I complain when my OH next gives me something crap!

Salvadoridory · 03/12/2025 15:04

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 10:42

Just for fun, what have you given as a Christmas present that totally fell flat and was misunderstood? My bad idea was a box of luxury crackers. It was some yrs ago, late 80s. Very cheap crackers were the norm and the luxury sort were more of a rarity. So I bought a box for my sister. She and her husband always had friends round on Boxing Day or NY Day, when she pulled out all the stops. The crackers would have graced any table. White with golden ribbons, they looked classy, and the items inside were so much nicer than the usual trinkets. Twice as expensive for half as many, it seemed the sort of thing many would like but would never justify buying. However, my sister decided that since nobody would give anyone crackers, they had to be intended just as packaging, so she proceeded to pull them all one after the other, and ended up with a pile of trinkets, albeit superior trinkets.

That's my best flop, but a close second is giving a friend a metal water bottle because she carried water in an old plastic lemonade bottle. So she now uses the bottle at home when the rest of us use glasses and carries on with her ancient plastic bottles outside.

I have been puzzling about this for a while, posh crackers? I pictured a box of superior Jacobs biscuits for cheese and couldnt work out why you would think crackers were packaging and where the hell did the trinkets come from 😀

AllJoyAndNoFun · 03/12/2025 15:05

When my son was about 18 months old he was obsessed with motorbikes so I bought him a ride on motorbike that you sat on and pushed along with your feet and I was so excited to see him open it ….. except he wasn’t quite tall enough for his feet to reach the ground so he couldn’t move it and he had an almighty meltdown for about an hour.

Also when he was 14 I got him some artisanal beef jerky for his stocking but I didn’t read the wrapper properly and it turned out to be for dogs. Fortunately he realised before he ate it.

tryingtobesogood · 03/12/2025 15:06

My dad very proudly presented my mum with a washing machine for christmas one year. She did not talk to him for weeks until he arrived home with a nice piece of jewellery. Another year he bought her a second hand bike, not sure why as she never rode bikes and we lived on top of an enormous hill, but actually that one she loved.

RamsaySnowsSausage · 03/12/2025 15:08

Aw, I thought the crackers were a nice thought. There is such a huge variety of crackers nowadays that are easy to get but back then they would have been a luxury.

My dad was a huge, huge martyr - he loves to go on about how hard done by he was so I would always try to get him really thoughtful, elaborate gifts to convince him I loved him. It took me about 30 years to realise that he actual hates this because it goes against his woe-is-me personality to have physical proof people love and care about him so I don't get him anything anymore. Final straw was when Guy Martin was big and dad loved him, so for birthdays and xmas's for a few years, I bought all the merch - books DVDs etc. But then I found them all in a cupboard under table clothes, as new, cellophane still on the DVDs etc. I KNOW he would have been absolutely busting to read/watch them but it gave him much more satisfaction to cut his nose off to spite his face and ignore them so he could keep on pretending he was sooo hard done by. Saved me £££ in the end. He also went on about wanting to go in a helicopter for years - family saved up and got him a voucher for a ride - he let it go out of the 12 month expiry date 😡without booking.

Then there was the xmas XP bought me SlimFast. I burst into tears 😂

5foot5 · 03/12/2025 15:08

When DD was about 2, certainly less than 3, I bought her a toy gorilla which, if you squeezed it, would start to dance and sing Macarena. I thought she would love it!

Well she did at first. But when she picked it up for a big hug and it started to dance and sing in her arms she screamed and threw it down then tearfully asked me to "tell Father Christmas take the monkey back"

KittyFinlay · 03/12/2025 15:08

Not exactly misunderstood but my Mum is very hard to buy for. I remember many times in my childhood when she would withdraw to her bedroom to sulk for the entire day because my Dad had got it wrong. I once bought her a case of wine which she didn't say much about, apart from that she preferred to drink British wine because she didn't like to support the EU. I can't remember what I bought the next year, but she said that clearly I had missed the hints she dropped about wanting wine again. So the next year I bought her another case of wine and made sure it was all British. She announced in January that she no longer liked wine. And then said on her birthday that it was a shame I never bought her wine.

Last year she asked for a specific TV subscription. My husband has gone over to show them how to use it a few times. She has told me regularly what a nuisance it is and how much she hates it because she can't get it to come on the TV.

I tend to think the gift she most appreciates is something new to complain about.

Hoppinggreen · 03/12/2025 15:09

One year I bought DH a 3D jigsaw of a subject he liked
He wanted a PS , I told him I had no idea about that sort of thing so he should just get himself one. When his wrapped gift was under the tree I saw him eyeing it and said that it WAS NOT a PS so if he wanted one to just get one
Christmas morning he opened it and said "its not a PS - what the hell is this?" Huge argument ensued (in front of my poor Mum).
It all calmed down and he apologised but then in the evening we went to see his family and when he unwrapped his presents from them they were mostly games for the PS he told them he was getting - another huge argument ensued (this time in front of his Mum, sister and Auntie)
Me and my friend ended up doing the huge 3D jigsaw on Boxing Day and refused to let him join in, he went shopping for a PS

Pistachiocake · 03/12/2025 15:10

Not mine, but heard of it- my friend had just got married, and the FIL had promised the couple some money (he'd actually let his son down on a house he was going to buy from him, gazumping his own son) as a wedding gift, but changed his mind. Anyway, on Christmas morning, he gave them a present with loads of those napkins Home Bargains sold a while back which were printed with a bank note design. My friend's mum went mad at him, saying it was a really nasty thing to promise them money, let them down, and then do that. The couple didn't think it was meant maliciously. I only met the man once, so can't comment on how he meant it, but I know the man was known as quite rich but tight.