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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Misunderstood Xmas gift

626 replies

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 10:42

Just for fun, what have you given as a Christmas present that totally fell flat and was misunderstood? My bad idea was a box of luxury crackers. It was some yrs ago, late 80s. Very cheap crackers were the norm and the luxury sort were more of a rarity. So I bought a box for my sister. She and her husband always had friends round on Boxing Day or NY Day, when she pulled out all the stops. The crackers would have graced any table. White with golden ribbons, they looked classy, and the items inside were so much nicer than the usual trinkets. Twice as expensive for half as many, it seemed the sort of thing many would like but would never justify buying. However, my sister decided that since nobody would give anyone crackers, they had to be intended just as packaging, so she proceeded to pull them all one after the other, and ended up with a pile of trinkets, albeit superior trinkets.

That's my best flop, but a close second is giving a friend a metal water bottle because she carried water in an old plastic lemonade bottle. So she now uses the bottle at home when the rest of us use glasses and carries on with her ancient plastic bottles outside.

OP posts:
NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

Maybeishouldcrochet · 03/12/2025 14:25

After Dad phoning me everyday to complain about having to do housework. I bought him some butler gloves for Christmas- my family thought it was hilarious. Dad was not amused and upset for months!!!

Springersrock · 03/12/2025 14:26

I bought my youngest daughter One Direction tickets.

I was very excited to give them to her, and to be fair, she was very excited to receive them.

When it came to the concert, she hated it. Too loud, too busy, too crowded, burst into tears and had a massive meltdown.

LemonDrizzleKay · 03/12/2025 14:26

morden123 · 03/12/2025 14:01

When I was about 9 (many moons ago) I went every week to a gift shop to pay off a Christmas present for my mum and dad, a little old man and lady in rocking chairs money boxes. Mum and Dad were only in their early 40's!!!, they had the good grace to not say anything bad

Those sound familiar. I seem to remember them. They were lovely - to a nine year old!

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:27

BernadetteJune · 03/12/2025 14:02

Bought an elderly relative a luxury damask tablecloth as they had been admiring ours which we got as a wedding present. They presumed we thought their table cloths were cheap and nasty. They stuck it in a draw and I don't think they have ever used it!

A thoughtful gift. The relative seems hard to please.

OP posts:
MaloryJones · 03/12/2025 14:27

Back in 1991, eldest DCs first Christmas, Me and then DH thought He might like a walking elephant that then stopped, lifted its trunk and made a noise .
Poor little chap was terrified

ChloeMorningstar · 03/12/2025 14:28

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:21

Wow, my sister has more than one user name 😁

Well if I am putting on Christmas dinner for people, I would most likely have crackers already, and be bemused as to why you would bring them without prior arrangement, and its not much of a present.

Namechangerage · 03/12/2025 14:29

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:14

Uhhhhmmm..... are you my sister 😂

It is a rogue gift! I think most people would agree 🤣

randomchats · 03/12/2025 14:30

We were at my parents for Christmas. I had asked my DH to get me one of those oversized pig money boxes. I was about 8.5 months pregnant. My dad saw me open it and thought my DH was insulting/pulling the piss out of me and got into a total strop. It was very funny

StewkeyBlue · 03/12/2025 14:31

NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

Better than the other way round though!

OneFootAfterTheOther · 03/12/2025 14:32

Once bought DH a book I thought he would be interested in. His response was “what have I done to deserve this”

BeardieWeirdie · 03/12/2025 14:34

A box of crackers is to be shared out - not quite the same as a bottle of perfume, silk scarf, massage voucher or jewellery she can enjoy all to herself. Poor sister is NBU!

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:34

ChloeMorningstar · 03/12/2025 14:28

Well if I am putting on Christmas dinner for people, I would most likely have crackers already, and be bemused as to why you would bring them without prior arrangement, and its not much of a present.

Didn't bring them. Wasn't Xmas Day. She's way older than me and had left home. She and her husband had a quiet Xmas but had friends in for Boxing Day or New Year every year when she cooked an elaborate meal (she's a brilliant cook) and took pride in making the table look good. I thought posh crackers would have been a nice addition and if she'd had some on Xmas Day they would have been long gone.

OP posts:
PiePlease · 03/12/2025 14:35

My mum got my dad a set of suitcases, which he opened one by one like Russian dolls, expecting there to be something inside. There was nothing inside.

He thought she was gifting him a holiday, but it was just suitcases. He was very upset!

Bingbangboo · 03/12/2025 14:36

morden123 · 03/12/2025 14:01

When I was about 9 (many moons ago) I went every week to a gift shop to pay off a Christmas present for my mum and dad, a little old man and lady in rocking chairs money boxes. Mum and Dad were only in their early 40's!!!, they had the good grace to not say anything bad

I saw a set of these in a charity shop recently and was struck by how ghastly they were! So funny that your 9 year old self thought they were lovely and not at all inappropriate for two 40 somethings.

MimiSunshine · 03/12/2025 14:37

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 10:42

Just for fun, what have you given as a Christmas present that totally fell flat and was misunderstood? My bad idea was a box of luxury crackers. It was some yrs ago, late 80s. Very cheap crackers were the norm and the luxury sort were more of a rarity. So I bought a box for my sister. She and her husband always had friends round on Boxing Day or NY Day, when she pulled out all the stops. The crackers would have graced any table. White with golden ribbons, they looked classy, and the items inside were so much nicer than the usual trinkets. Twice as expensive for half as many, it seemed the sort of thing many would like but would never justify buying. However, my sister decided that since nobody would give anyone crackers, they had to be intended just as packaging, so she proceeded to pull them all one after the other, and ended up with a pile of trinkets, albeit superior trinkets.

That's my best flop, but a close second is giving a friend a metal water bottle because she carried water in an old plastic lemonade bottle. So she now uses the bottle at home when the rest of us use glasses and carries on with her ancient plastic bottles outside.

I read the whole OP thinking it was about crackers you eat. A bit rogue but I see your thinking.
to get to end and it was table crackers you pull. That was a terrible choice of gift, even for the 80s 😄

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:39

MimiSunshine · 03/12/2025 14:37

I read the whole OP thinking it was about crackers you eat. A bit rogue but I see your thinking.
to get to end and it was table crackers you pull. That was a terrible choice of gift, even for the 80s 😄

What about the water bottle?

OP posts:
Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:43

StewkeyBlue · 03/12/2025 14:31

Better than the other way round though!

@NoKnit Until recently we had neighbours, chinese, who frequently gave us gifts of various foods. Then they gave us something that may have been food, or perhaps bath product. That was more than 5 yrs ago and we still don't dare try to use it.

OP posts:
NimbleDreamer · 03/12/2025 14:43

MimiSunshine · 03/12/2025 14:37

I read the whole OP thinking it was about crackers you eat. A bit rogue but I see your thinking.
to get to end and it was table crackers you pull. That was a terrible choice of gift, even for the 80s 😄

Me too.

I was like "a box of luxury crackers would be nice actually" but then I realised they were Christmas crackers and then thought "oh fuck no" 😅

Tbf the water bottle present was a good idea though.

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 14:44

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:21

Wow, my sister has more than one user name 😁

Well I'm not your sister op. I think it's a lovely idea - and I know exactly what you mean about something (usually fripperies!) you'd love to buy but can't justify buying yourself.

My badly received gift was to an elderly neighbour (now deceased) to whom we always gave some Christmas mince pies. One year I thought I'd mix it up and DH and I chose a lovely panetonne from an Italian deli. For some reason he sat on it - and, even more inexplicably, he told us he had. I explained over the phone it was a panettone and he just kept saying "panna WHAT?"

legoanddogtoys · 03/12/2025 14:45

StonwEd · 03/12/2025 14:25

I bought my mum and dad a fire stick when they were quite a new thing. I thought it was a brilliant present as they only had normal TV. They didn't understand it at all, i tried to explain it in front of everyone but they couldn't have cared less, they looked really disappointed!!
Of course a couple of years down the line everyone had them and of course they used loads of the channels.

This reminds me of the time we bought MIL an Alexa smart speaker, when they were also fairly new. She clearly misunderstood the whole idea and assumed it was just a speaker to be attached to some sort of CD player etc. Her reaction was along the lines of 'ONE speaker! Who wants ONE speaker? I've got speakers with my stereo! I assume it was cheap'. She stayed in a bit of a sulk all day. She warmed slightly when DH set it up in her kitchen but she still maintained she wouldn't use it because she already has a radio in there.

She now uses it every day and has asked for another for her bedroom! She flatly denies being grumpy about receiving it at first.

Cadenza12 · 03/12/2025 14:45

I opened this gift and made appropriate noises. Would have got away with it if DD didn't ask 'what is it?' Absolutely no idea, there was a protracted , increasingly awkward silence. (It was a scarf pin thingy, as the giver explained).

katseyes7 · 03/12/2025 14:45

oops l misread the original post. I was given, l didn't give. Sorry!

Mine was a secret santa at work.
It was a sex positions book (albeit pretty tastefully photographed) and a jar of chocolate body paint.
I found out later on that the person who gave it to me was the lass l car shared with. Who was well aware that my marriage was in dire straits.
I hid them at home, intending to get rid of them when the binmen came. But my (now ex) husband found them and went mad, accusing me of having an affair. The genuine explanation didn't wash with him.
I was lucky, considering how abusive he was. And the person who gave me the present knew that as well. It could have turned out much worse.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 03/12/2025 14:46

I ordered, what I thought was a hand wash and cream set, for an aunt... had them sent to her...
it was the end of covid and aunt worked in a hospital at the time... and I had accidentally sent her a duo of hand sanitiser.

I imagine she thought I was suggesting she was riddled with covid germs!

FestiveFruitloop · 03/12/2025 14:46

Not me, but this just reminded me of a letter I read in a magazine once, where someone had bought their friend a nice glass spaghetti jar. On their next visit the jar was standing empty on the windowsill and the recipient said something along the lines of it was lovely but she didn't know what it was for.
'Oh, it's a spaghetti jar.'
The next time the gift giver visited the jar was full of Heinz spaghetti hoops.