To think there is a definite surge in annoyance towards the disabled?

[WarySwan]

I have seen it in real life. Not just social media forums and news outlets where every other post seems to be about 'free money this for disabled' and 'free cars'.

My 2 children have autism. They get highest rate DLA. About £800 a month. We get respite care funded that costs the tax payer about £700 a month.

Just had an extension on our new build house, housing association, brand new bedroom and ensuite installed. Free of charge through the council.

Motability 7 seater car. 25 plate.

People seem to just see this and see the money. They do not see the costs that are present because of disability. The amount of time and resources it takes to keep 2 profoundly children at home.

They do not see that my children will need 24/7 care for life. 2-1 support in public. The constant cleaning and caring. Waking up at the crack of dawn, years on end. Cleaning smearing and endless washing. Endless marks on your body from a child who doesn't get that taking a chunk out of you will hurt that much and scar

Watching your eldest almost die as he can't speak a word or use a communication device. Meaning appendicitis went undetected until he was almost dying. The constant battle of keeping a cannula in his arm with hospital staff just not getting why a play therapist does not bloody cut it and he needs constant supervision that I cannot possibly do 24/7 without moving from the bedside. The weeks spend in recovery because of this.

If we do not or cannot provide this care, residential placements are about £40,000+ per month. Yes. Per month. It is eye watering in cost. That won't change anytime soon because social care is beyond shot to bits.

My children deserve the best life possible. And a dignified society should surely want to ensure this happens? Children who are not disabled and their parents have options. They have chances and doorways. Mine will never work. Never have a marriage or children, they won't even be able to cook a basic meal.

There is no overtime or upskilling for me. No situation where they fly the nest and I can focus on my career again. Unless they become some dangerous through no fault of their own that a 40k plus a month placement goes ahead as the alternative means I could die or be seriously injured, and that would mean they'd be at risk if I am literally unconscious on the floor.

They still deserve dignity and compassion. The chance of a good life. They are very happy currently. Good routines that are followed to a T. Safe at home because I have the resources to do it.

Care placement does not save money. Unfortunately. It would cost over ten times what I get in benefits.

I have seen so many mentions of people saying those on benefits should have no savings at all. Nothing. Really? You think my life isn't hard enough? You think I shouldn't be allowed a small nest of savings too?

When I finally drop down from caring, I will have next to no pension. After spending a lifetime ensuring the state doesn't have to take full responsibility for 2 adult men that will mean at least 4 paid members of staff are present at all times.

I am not just talking about MN. It is everywhere. Even 'funny' reels on Instagram targeted about how the disabled get this and that. How they should all drive a basic tiny car that has something written in bold to make sure everyone knows its a free car, as if they're really disabled, they'll use. That'll stop the chancers eh!

This is NOT about criticism towards PIP and DLA for things people deem questionable... even though they almost certainly dont have all the facts. This is about the blatant and not hidden disgust and begrudge of help to those with lifelong and profound disability

PEOPLE keep saying in black and white, no room for confusion in their words, that the disabled get too much. That it isn't fair.

I suppose this thread will get deleted. But a lot of views seem to be going unchallenged about the disabled that wouldn't be allowed if it was about something else that's suppose to be a protected characteristic. Seems to have quite a few comparisons with a certain country in Europe 80 or so years ago. When the hatred and deceit was being thrown around and brain washing people before not many years later, the public became okay with euthanasia of them.

Hell, I am sure we are already there for some. As I have seen with my own eyes, people commenting on MN and the likes of social media where their bloody name and pictures of themselves and their work can be traced, that euthanasia could be an option, ideally.

I do have to admit that I am getting pretty pissed off with the pain and anguish and the level of taxpayer support that is required to cope with the disability being knowingly created by the offspring of two cousins whose parents/ grandparents etc were also cousins.

The figures from areas high in the cultures which do this are absolutely shocking. The disabilities are often severe. I would outlaw more than one generation of cousin marriage, or possibly all cousin marriage.

Chillingly, during Covid multiple families reported that DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) orders had been put on their disabled relatives without any consultation. I think people tend to think these things are "in the past".

https://www.autism.org.uk/what-we-do/news/cqc-publish-report-on-dnacpr

And my DS1 is autistic
at 7 he was diagnosed through the NHS
he got a very expensive SEN, 24000 a year funding

he got taxi transport to a school that met his needs
he was awarded high level DLA, low level for mobility

All the ‘tax payers’
money spent on him provided the support, therapy and education needed to help him.
he is now 25, has lots of friends, a girlfriend. Lives independently, has a first class degree, is doing a masters, and works in a bar. He is an extremely talented musician and performs in a band.
none or that would be possible without the help he received, his behavioural problems were so extreme I believe he would have been dead or in prison by now. That taxpayers money IMO saved his life and allowed him to be a functioning and contributing member of society

I am eternally grateful that all this help was available, however I still had to work through all of this, I still had 2 younger DS to support.
i never received a penny in tax credits, housing etc.
I did not make a lifestyle choice, I had a disabled child

Maybe we all need to go slow where children are concerned? See what the outcome is for first child, check you have resources to cater for their needs - before expanding a family?

No, I don't see any annoyance towards the disabled.

What I see in this country are people being arrested and charged for speaking out on social media, or for flying a British flag. Otherwise everyone is better off just keeping quiet.

Can't wait to get out of here, when the proverbial door opens again.

But a blue badge holder is a blue badge holder
My son is eligible because he gets HRM under severe mental impairment rules he doesn't need wider spaces, but closer proximity to shops as necessary zero awareness of danger

If soone qualifies for a blue badge ,that makes them just as eligible as the next person
Save your anger for those who park in blue badge spaces without a blue badge

Badenoch is on the money here and in tune with the nation.

“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

At first, the Tory leader tried to laugh it off, saying that “the Conservative Christian Fellowship gets its own specific message.”
That didn’t satisfy Robinson, who pressed: “But is it unchristian to expect the state to do what your family or your household or your wider community should do for you?”
Remarkably, she appeared to agree: “In early Christian times there was no state or welfare, so I think you can argue that actually.” Expanding on her theme, she added that “the Christian tradition is about communities and families and charity, not about compulsory taxation in order to pay welfare”

How does anyone pretend to be disabled? Claimants need to provide evidence from professionals, carer diaries, doctors letters, diagnosis. They are all checked by pip, phone calls, forms. It's impossible to fake! Everything is checked! Even then, people die before they even get help!

Nonsense ablist post.

"Have zero or little quality of life"

Who decides that? Some outsiders might think that about my adult son but in fact he has a very happy life.

Not wishing to be disagreeable but I call bullshit on that. I have friends with severely autistic (non-verbal) children, both knew from early months. There are many, many signs. I guess you aren’t looking for them if you’re already invested in the next pregnancy. There’s a lot to be said for watching and waiting if in doubt - for you and for them.

@WarySwan , your situation sounds awful and I hope no one would begrudge you the help you need. I agree with the above comment from @Kleeneze .

Of course you can fake difficulties when they rely on self-reporting.

I'm not going to read the whole thread because it will just make me angry but I agree with you. Disabled people and refugees/asylum seekers are two groups of people that are absolutely fair game right now and I don't know how anyone can say otherwise and keep a straight face. I have definitely noticed an increase in people saying they don't believe autism is even real.

I hope you continue to receive the support your family needs.

These threads always go the same way.

People said before that when pip came in the genuine wound have nothing to worry about. But so many are turned down

The meaning of the diagnosis autism has been so diluted by the likes of Simon Baron Cohen that when you say your children are autistic they imagine someone who is socially awkward, not someone nonverbal who can’t manage basic self-care, can’t read etc.

Just checking, are you suggesting that our disabled children be allowed to die because really they’re just violent and smelly?

They can and they do.
My daughter lives in private rented accommodation but next to several housing association properties with a communal space. They are friendly but are all non-working due to mental health issues (ADHD/autism/agoraphobia).
My daughter works long night shifts and comes home exhausted and is becoming increasingly angry watching them sit around chatting, smoking weed, ordering multiple deliveroos a day, they post on social media about their lives which include road trips overseas in a recently bought camper van.
She is mid-20s, they are early 30s and have no intention of ever working.

Something has to change.

Or maybe everyone should be forced to stop at only 1 child? You know, just in case.

There are genuine claimants and those that will fleece the system for everything they can get. My issue is people who have worked for their entire lives and cannot work any longer that cannot claim anything. They have become disabled and then because they have built up a small pension they receive absolutely nothing for all those years worked which would help the anxiety of the family still having to run a household and pay a mortgage. Those that have worked and contributed to society always get shafted in some way. I've never wanted to live off benefits but sometimes I just think what is the point of working. I've had the comments that you should exaggerate the symptoms to get PIP - say you can't walk far, can't cook for yourself etc but I'm not prepared to go down that route.

The problem is that people with mild mental illness are seen to be playing the system. I have anxiety and ADHD but have never not worked. I am well enough to go out with friends, have holidays etc so the conditions are not that severe for me.

As someone without a disability you probably don't notice it. As a disabled person I have noticed it a lot.

Yup.
I expect it will be deleted.
Hope not because id like to be able to link to it next time someone claims that genuinely disabled people are not being targeted

This threads got it all.
The deserving v undeserving
Racism
Eugenics

My son is severely autistic non verbal etc,it certainly wasn't apparent in the early months ,it gradually became apparent when he failed to meet milestones
He was diagnosed at three but it was still a long time before it became apparent just how complex his needs would be.

It really demonstrates a complete lack of compassion and ignorance. They are still people, not objects. Notice how they don't really say what they are thinking should be done, just skirt around it. Go on, be brave CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone