Christmas now unaffordable

[purplepentagram]

Is there even any point in me bothering with the tree, decs and all that goes with it. When I can’t even afford to do any shopping.
all you see in the news is all about how those on benefits are so better off and living a life a luxury…. Well can someone point me in the right direction cause our life sucks.
things were ok till my husbands health took a turn for the worse.which is also starting to effect our marriage - for that might as well be over an all. He is now under investigation due to neurological tremors and a few other things. I’m also disabled with physical and neurological issues. I get some pip and my husband gets carers.( he’s not applied for pip due to believing all the nastiness that’s currently going round) Our universal credit is 1085 a month after deductions. Our rent is 700 of that. So we’re living off less than 500 a month. By the time Iv paid all the bills there is nothing left. So what’s the point in even carrying on anymore. Things were manageable even after our youngest child dropped off our claim. ( he’s still in college full time and at home) my daughter has left and gone to uni. My eldest 2 have their own life’s. Am I wrong in telling them not to bother coming home this year and asking my son if he can find a friends to go to instead. We’re down to 2 meals a week, minimal heating due to the amount that British Gas is asking for each month. Iv cancelled everything I could from insurance policies to subscriptions, internet ( that’s due to go off any day now) life is miserable and I can’t seem to find anyway out. We can’t afford to move, or even get on the council list. All the local help has stopped applications and I can’t even get a food bank referral. There is nothing left in our town and trying to find work is impossible. Just keep getting refused. So no Christmas for us this year and the kids have all been told not to bother since there is nothing. I just feel that the only way would be if we wasn’t here to be a burden. We don’t have any other family or friends. So that’s not an option either. Rather fed up on life and how the news is portraying things when it’s way far from reality.

"Hives dont stop you working"

I'm guessing you've never suffered from chronic urticaria, esp paired with anaphylaxis. Google it sometime. Last time my son had an episode he was blue lighted to hospital and kept in for 24 hours till it subsided. He couldn't stand, let alone work.

I'm completely aware this £71000 is ridiculous 😒

Do you really not qualify for FSM? Sorry, I don't know your whole situation, so if you are on UC/working as well.

I've never been on benefits but have friends who are whose DC at same specialist school as DC. They do have their rent and CT paid, UC income for 3 DC all with highest DLA with mobile elements. From what they've told me and amd conversations I've overheard at school gates, also the food packages and vouchers that are handed over, they really do get a lot of money!

Not saying this is true for all, just my experience. Two seemingly able adults who smoke at the gate, go into a taxi with DC, oh and she is pregnant again. It really doesn't give the best picture but I'm glad they're there together dropping off and picking up their DC, which not all do.

Meanwhile those of us who don't get the freebies stand and have to explain to our kids why they don't have the bags of food and presents, which could be handled better I guess. Xx

Have you engaged with the job market lately?

That’s probably not the best example though. That woman didn’t have a starving baby; she did it for a TikTok experiment. Many of the religious places of worship advised they didn’t have formula on hand but gave advice as to how she could obtain some. Re your spoiler alert; some churches did offer help - 9 I think - and one pastor said he would go and buy her some but of course, she didn’t really need it since it was all fake. She even used recordings of a crying baby since she didn’t even have a baby.

That was in the USA where a lot of the churches she contacted are more about white supremacy than Christianity.

Apologies I made an error there and can't edit. The last part should say that LCWRA and Carer's Element (the £201 payment which is part of UC) cannot be claimed together by the same person.

However, if you received LCWRA rather than him, your husband could still receive both Carer's Element and Carer's Allowance.

OP
I am sorry to hear this
failing all else could you start a go fund me with your story ? If anything it raises awareness. Also I hope newspapers might pick up your story from mumsnet & offer you money for your story
it’s not right what’s happening in this country
no no one should be struggling like your family

OP, all councils in England, Scotland and Wales are required to have Council Tax Support schemes, both for pensioners and for working age people.

If you go to your councils website and put in Council Tax Support or Council Tax Reduction, you are likely to find you can apply for it online.

The amounts vary from council to council, but even the meanest council in the UK still covers 50% of council tax for working age claimants.
Most cover up to 80% of the yearly amount.

If OPs DH is too proud to claim for PIP, then I doubt he’ll be happy to ask people to give them money. They need to claim the benefits they are entitled to instead.

He isn't too proud, the OP said he was too scared, having watched what they put OP through for her to get her award. He doesn't feel strong enough to get through it, especially when there is no guarantee of an award even if he meets the criteria (they can and do lie).

Have you got mcas? Try the support groups online for financial help.

As someone with no mains gas, in an all electric house, I'd just like to point out how much more expensive it is to heat with electricity, especially if you're not on some sort of dual rate system (cheaper at night) with storage heaters.

I don't work but my husband does which means we don't earn too much for UC but do earn too much to receive FSM because the threshold basically means that if you work, unless you are only working a very tiny amount of hours then you won't get it. If no adults are working then that will be why they get it.

Rent will depend on the area but unless you live in a cheaper area, it is unusual now for rent to be completely fully covered. We get a CT discount but it isn't fully paid.

My son gets the highest rates of DLA too, both care and mobility but I've never received any food packages, vouchers or bags of presents. Must be a school support thing rather than a standard UC support thing.

Hi OP
i am not going to have any more practical advice but I can add my voice to those that say
please please claim everything you are entitled to. Ignore the bloody haters, I want my taxes to help those that need it. I value society, we all need help sometimes

also yes please contact all the charities and support, it’s literally what they want to do

as for Xmas, it really isn’t about presents and food it’s about people and love.i echo the thought that everyone can bring something or eat and then come round. Play games, chat together, play music

please look after yourself

You’re not saying this is all true, but you’ve heard it at the schools gates🙄it’s just your experience.. from what you’ve heard, from your ‘friends’.
Then to round off your comment add a couple of kisses! What a truly, unpleasant person you are😬

Sorry I haven't read the whole thread so forgive me if I'm mentioning stuff that's already been mentioned.
You absolutely need to explore why you don't have the LCWRA element on your claim. I help a lot of people with UC50 forms and rarely see anyone turned down for it especially not for a serious neurological condition. If you have been assessed and were only awarded LCW then if your condition has deteriorated you can submit fir notes stating this as they will re-assess you.
Ask your local council if they have a household support fund or hardship fund. Ours are currently giving away food and fuel vouchers.
Can either of you do nay work? Once you have LCW or LCWRA you will get a work allowance meaning no deductions for earnings until you reach £400 odd of earnings - sorry I can't remember the exact figure.

I am a benefits advisor and the charity I work for deals with people over 50. I see a lot of situations where both of a couple are unwell and yes they are generally not starving although obviously it's still a tight budget. I can only think either rent way higher than the Uc rent element is covering or they have UC elements missing. As many other have said a trip or call to CAB or Age UK would be able to clarify what is going wrong.

I believe there are more people like op and her family who need a level of intervention to access appropriate help than you would like to believe.

There's a lot of abelist bullshite spouted on this thread, some of you lot should be ashamed.

The Carer's Allowance of £360... is deducted from her UC, as it's considered income.

I

To confirm, from my experience, these are parents I've been there with at school gates for years and have had many conversations with. We have become friends, our kids meet up. They do receive a lot of money, their taxis are paid for, they do have 3 DC at the specialist school, FSMs, highest rate DLA and get of extra stuff from the school, as described.

Sorry but these are all facts, not judgement. Observation, some people find it difficult to look after themselves yet alone able to hold down a job, but it doesn't mean they aren't loving parents. Their focus in life is to care for their children, and as having difficulties themselves, it's often the case their DC will have as well and need support.

My whole point was that there is thankfully a system in place to help with this and so many benefits.

Please, I really am not unpleasant at all, I care, I just respond to posts from my own experiences. If any way offensive I apologise, I'm far from perfect with my own diagnosis. Xx

I used to do all that for a living. Get down to Citizens Advice and see what they can get for you. Husband should try to get PIP. You should try to get everything you might be entitled to. CAB are good. Also maybe get a bit of free counselling and tell GP you are depressed. And try to find out carers networks and disability networks in your area. You need to share how you feel with supportive people as you sound very depressed.

Thanks for confirming this. I was pretty sure it was still the case that the Carer’s Allowance is taken away, and a much lower ‘Carers Element’ is then added on to the person’s UC.

However, the Carer’s Allowance is the gateway to getting the Carers Element iyswim.

It’s all quite mad.

It really is quite mad, as not everyone is entitled to the Carer's Element either. It's also used as income if applying for council tax support, so often causes folks real problems.

I can see why OP's husband is a bit daunted as the whole thing can be quite overwhelming, hence so much goes unclaimed every year.

@Chinsupmeloves when l read your comment, first thought, how is that going to help op, in anyway.
There’s so much misinformation out there and you’re adding to it and no l don’t believe your comment is coming from a good place.