Christmas now unaffordable

[purplepentagram]

Is there even any point in me bothering with the tree, decs and all that goes with it. When I can’t even afford to do any shopping.
all you see in the news is all about how those on benefits are so better off and living a life a luxury…. Well can someone point me in the right direction cause our life sucks.
things were ok till my husbands health took a turn for the worse.which is also starting to effect our marriage - for that might as well be over an all. He is now under investigation due to neurological tremors and a few other things. I’m also disabled with physical and neurological issues. I get some pip and my husband gets carers.( he’s not applied for pip due to believing all the nastiness that’s currently going round) Our universal credit is 1085 a month after deductions. Our rent is 700 of that. So we’re living off less than 500 a month. By the time Iv paid all the bills there is nothing left. So what’s the point in even carrying on anymore. Things were manageable even after our youngest child dropped off our claim. ( he’s still in college full time and at home) my daughter has left and gone to uni. My eldest 2 have their own life’s. Am I wrong in telling them not to bother coming home this year and asking my son if he can find a friends to go to instead. We’re down to 2 meals a week, minimal heating due to the amount that British Gas is asking for each month. Iv cancelled everything I could from insurance policies to subscriptions, internet ( that’s due to go off any day now) life is miserable and I can’t seem to find anyway out. We can’t afford to move, or even get on the council list. All the local help has stopped applications and I can’t even get a food bank referral. There is nothing left in our town and trying to find work is impossible. Just keep getting refused. So no Christmas for us this year and the kids have all been told not to bother since there is nothing. I just feel that the only way would be if we wasn’t here to be a burden. We don’t have any other family or friends. So that’s not an option either. Rather fed up on life and how the news is portraying things when it’s way far from reality.

@purplepentagram op, sorry if youve answered to this, i havent seen all your responses...

you should definately be able to get a LCWRA on your uc.
you trigger it by getting 'sick notes' from the gp. they need to be continuous for at least 3 months, upload these onto your journal and it will trigger a fit for work assesment. once done, if granted LCWRA its either an extra £423 a month on top of your uc award.
make sure your DH is claiming the CARERS ELEMENT on UC aswell as just carers allowance. carers allowance is taken £ for £ from your uc but the carers element isnt.

rent £700
couple over 25 £628
carers element £201
total £1169

obviously carers allowance is taken from this £ for £ but you then also have this on top as a seperate payment.

getting LCWRA would give you an extra £400+ a month

and get your husband applying for pip! he doesnt need a diagnosis, as long as he meets the needs critiria, i know its long and brutal to do but any help would be a huge benefit to you all right now. he needs to put pride aside and get what he is seeminlgy entitled to help for.

PIP isn't something that you just claim and are awarded. It is a bitter and damaging fight for anyone whose disability isn't both outwardly obvious and extreme and many people are unsuccessful even if too ill to work. There is always a significant risk that the process will further disable you/damage your mental health while not leading to any sort of award. This is deliberate. It;'s designed that way to keep the numbers down. Many people are simply too ill to access it.

Who administers your injections?

OP you mentioned debts on one of your posts.
Contact step change and they will set up a debt repayment plan that's affordable. Even if it's only 5 quid a month and takes 50 years to repay. It's better than struggling on xx

They are self administered subcutaneous injections.

They’ll be self administered. I do all mine at home

You find me one that is genuine and not some scam. But thanks anyway.

Lionbridge/Telus and Data Annotation are two that aren't scams.
More quickly and easily, although lwss lucratively, you could do Prolific.

It’s not possible to survive on two meals a week. You wouldn’t have the energy to be typing replies to people online; you’d be on the verge of death. You’ve been given lots of suggestions as to what you can do. Are you going to follow any of them?

Of course it is - there was a Scottish guy called Angus Barbieri who went without any food at all for over a year. He was given some extra vitamins but his body weight sustained him by providing the calories he didn't get from food. It's a horrible situation to be in if not by choice (he chose not to eat) but even if it's unsafe without vitamins etc, it's not scientifically impossible.

My injections are self administered

Wish I’d never bothered posting now. This is why we don’t speak to people, ask for help or advice. Always looked down on, called a lier or worse. Would it make any difference if I had said that I totally hate Xmas only ever bothered when the kids were little but in all honesty I hate it. It’s so overwhelming and stressful and for what. Never celebrated it when I was a child.
yes my life sucks, I know and I don’t need reminding.
yes Iv given up because I’m mentally and physically exhausted. Im struggling to even function on daily basis. Im past caring and really can’t do with it anymore. I’d always been the rock of our family unit. But Iv now got to a point where I could quite easily just disappear. Not that anyone would even notice. At least that way I wouldn’t be another burden on society that’s just trying to survive this cruel world. I’d happily swap all my health issues and disability’s to have a job or something that I could do without being in constant pain.

Can you please explain what is prolific and data annotation. Iv no idea what any of what you said is.

i have to be prompted, reminded or asked about meals or snacks

So, do you have 'snacks' on the days that you don't have a meal?

OP are you eating anything at all between your 2 meals a week? Are you having the odd biscuit or piece of bread? Have you tried contacting social services? Don't answer if I've missed it and you've answered already...

Google it.

Please, please claim the benefits you are entitled to. I'm a higher rate tax payer and I have no problem at all paying it and realise I am fortunate. Percentage wise, the stupid tax system where food and fuel are taxed, your proportion of tax is still higher than mine. It's wrong. It makes the country better place when those that can afford it pay more tax AND it helps those that need help too. That is you. I feel so sad you're not claiming everything you're entitled to. Please, please claim it. You're entitled to help when times are hard, just as we're all required to pay tax whether or not we can afford it. I hope you get the help you so desperately need.

Lionbridge had an abysmal reputation in the industry I used to work in. They were not considered a reliable employer at all. The scores they get on the boards (for which I can no longer access full descriptions due to having left the industry) are so low I'd worry they suggest non-payment. What kind of work do you think OP could do for them?

Prolific is a site where you can answer questionnaires for payment, however there’s a very long waiting list.

To summarise some of the suggestions

email or phone the CAB and ask for advice
self refer to adult social care
olio app for free food
use timers / calendar reminders / alerts on your phone for food / medication / daily tasks
contact GP for yourself and husband, for husband you can contact gp and express your concerns, you could do this via an online form and this may be easier
apply for MR for yourself and PIP for DH, think about functioning rather than diagnosis
consider impact malnourishment is having on your emotional, mental and physical health and ability to think clearly.

Honestly just stop paying the debts and write to them telling them you can’t afford it

Yes of course. Prolific is a legitimate questionaire website, you sign up and give them some information about your demographics and then you'll hopefully get some paid questionairs, some of which are quite interesting. It's mostly from researchers at various universities. With autism, you might get some additional ones actually.

For the others, the Earn £10 a day thread in the money section is a good place to start. It's just occured to me though that earnings will get offset against benefits so I guess that's something to factor in?

I do work for them (well, Telus now) and I've never not been paid what I'm owed to the penny, and that's been coming up for six years.

It's never people with moderate to severe disabilities that are gaining from the benefits system, nor their carers. They're not people that are likely to start rampaging or looting if they're unhappy though, so no government gives two hoots about them. It's utterly disgraceful and I'm sorry you're in this position. Your husband really needs to apply for PIP.

You’ve been given loads of advice from what I’ve seen. Some people really know their stuff and have advised accordingly. It’s up to you if you want to take it though

Hopefully it goes better than the woman who rang churches asking for baby formula for her baby who hadn't fed for a day.
(Spoiler: nearly all churches refused her but 2 mosques and a Buddhist temple agreed to help her)

There are so many suggestions on this thread now, OP, that it must get overwhelming.

Don’t be put off by the posters who are suspicious, just let that slide. There is also a lot of help on here.

Pick two things that you think you can follow up.

I’d suggest:

1. Call adult social services tomorrow and ask for an assessment. Tell them how often you are eating, and tell them about your husband’s and son’s issues.
2. Call the GP and if they won’t give you an appointment ask for the Practice Manager’s email. Email and explain you and your husband need to be seen and have been waiting a year.

That would at least be a start. I do think your family need social services help now. There is a lot of vulnerability and a lot to unpick.

OP I haven't read the full thread so I'm unsure if anyone has said this already but are you aware that you should be receiving both carer's element and carer's allowance? They are 2 different things. If you get £700 housing element then your UC should be

Couple over 25 - £628.10
Housing - £700
Carer's Element - 201.68

Total - £1529.78

Your husband receives carers allowance which is separate from UC and a different thing from the carer element. This is £83.30 per week but for the purposes of UC it is considered to be £360.96 per month as they essentially multiply it by 52 then divide by 12 to get a monthy amount as UC is paid monthly.

This should leave you £1168.92 in UC each month.

You should then also have the PIP amount you mentioned plus the carer's allowance which is paid separately.

This should give you a total of £1809.88

It sounds like you aren't currently claiming everything you are entitled to. Your husband should also apply for PIP and you should apply for LCWRA on UC as well because that would be an extra £423.27 per month. Only one of you can receive the money for LCWRA though and the person getting it cannot also receive carer's allowance so it would make more sense for it to be you.