DH kicking off as I want to uninvite DMIL/DSIL from Christmas Day

[Christmasdayissue]

NC’d for this. Please can people let me know if they think IABU.

Background - DH and I recently moved into our own home after renting for years and having limited space.

Yesterday we hosted DMIL and DSIL for a roast. Both have stomach problems - fine. However, they spent the hour following the roast sat in our living room openly breaking wind and making no attempt to hide this fact. In front of our two young DC (both found it hilarious). No apology from either of them, the only acknowledgment being ‘well you know we have stomach issues and eating that makes it flare up’.

DH didn’t say anything to them. When I told him after they left that I found it disgusting, he said I was prudish and that they can’t help it. I asked why they couldn’t leave the room. He said it’s good they feel at home and he grew up with them being like that so doesn’t see the issue.

I’ve told him today I don’t want them to come on Christmas Day as planned if that’s how they will behave, and set such an awful example to our DC. He said how dare I threaten that and if I ever thought that was appropriate then he’d simply go out for lunch with them to a pub instead.

As someone said farting in front of your partner is one thing, I can't believe people think it's ok to go to someone's house and let loose!
Surely you can't hold it in for couple of hours, or nip to loo once in a while.

absolutely not!
How do some prat’s manage to set fire to their farts if it’s ‘only wind’?

Even if the menu is generally a Sunday roast, I would still expect a close family member like a son to plan the menu with my allergies and intolerances in mind. They shouldn’t need reminding.

There's a difference between normal body functioning and doing it for entertainment. The OP makes it sound as though they're lifting up a hip to try and outdo one another.

Well unless dh wants to make the full meal they’ll get what’s made.
they don’t have to come! Tell dh in a very sympathetic concerned tone how awful you feel for their intolerances being triggered you’re making a very simple fodmap Christmas meal…
carrot soup
turkey breast-plain, green beans, carrots, plain boiled potatoes
melon sorbet..

Yes, this is more or less the ‘vibe’

I don't know about the OP, but if my own family was behaving like that, I wouldn't invite them for Christmas lunch in my home either.

Light a candle, and turn the volume up

DH pulling his weight in the kitchen?

What do you mean? He doesn't cook? Wash up?

So, was his only contribution to the meal bringing excuses for why his family won't stop farting?

What a prize catch of in laws...

This brilliant solution

He can just about fill/empty the dishwasher. Luckily he has other qualities, although they aren’t on show here.

Bloody gross.
Let them all go out for lunch and fart there.

As someone who has stomach issues and may fart on occasions I get up and go elsewhere

its absolutely disgusting to do in company

I would tell dh he has the following options
1 he tells his mother and sister to stop and leave the room
2 he does as threatened and finds somewhere to go out with them, and good luck finding anywhere, plus will they fart when out?

edited to add I also have intolerances that make it worse, I simply doesn’t eat the stuff, much as I would like to, so why can’t they just do the same instead of being so selfish

I wouldn't be happy to have them in my home on Christmas day, breaking wind like that. No manners, no apology ....very crass.

It can smell vile especially with things such as IBS. @Christmasdayissue is well within her rights to say they can’t do that in her living areas. They should pop to the garden or the toilet , open the window and spray some air freshener. It’s called manners. I have severe IBS and I’d never do this in someone’s home it’s foul

So they'd have to leave the room every time they need to fart?
How inconvenient.

You need to try and lighten up when it comes to bodily functions.
Granted they could say, excuse me,but to be as disgusted as you are.... Seems extreme to me (sorry, we're all different and I don't mean to invalidate your feelings).
Just tell the kids that it's not how we do things so don't get any ideas and allow the kids to giggle at the joy that farts generally bring.
Farts are funny and laughter is infectious and we could all do with some high energy and smiles and laughter 🤷🏼‍♂️

I assume you don’t suffer from stomach issues such as IBS, colitis etc. They are supposed to suffer from intolerances, believe me when I say farts can smell absolutely horrendous and it’s not acceptable

Farts maybe a natural function of the body, but so it weeing and pooing, is that acceptable to do in public?

it’s called manners

If they want to behave like animals, then surely they want to be treated like ones. Just feed them outside👌

25percentoffeverything

I haven’t seen my family in months so if dh declared they couldn’t come here I’d get rid of him for the day instead!!!!

I am 62 and can honestly say that I never heard my mother, father, sister or any man with whom I've been romantically involved do such a thing. Nor have I inflicted my intestinal gas on anyone else.

We never even uttered the "f word" (and I don't mean f**k) in our home growing up, and I don't believe I've ever spoken it aloud.

The idea of people snorting and giggling over spraying their fecal particles around others is just unimaginable. Decent people step away or otherwise regulate themselves. It's not necessary to gorge at a family meal where the company, not the food, is the primary focus.

It’s gross but if you knowingly included gluten / dairy knowing that they are intolerant then you deserved it.

That is just grim OP. WTF wants to listen to 2 people farting on Christmas Day, spoiling the Christmas carols. Going to need some strong candles if they come. Bork!

🤣

"I suffer with stomach issues, but I don't sit in front of my in-laws farting. I'd go off to the toilet and fart in there. "

I suffer with stomach issues and I would NOT make it to the toilet in time. A lot of people can't control it and this gets harder as you get older.

Unless she force-fed them, it's on them to manage their diets.