Which one of these parents would you judge more

[Cantbearsedtosortthoseelvesout]

Or think of as a crappier parent?

Child A-6-Always dressed immaculately in new clothes, new toys, hair beautifully done, wears make up a fair amount and mum & grandma spray perfume on her, has a mobile phone-‘Just’ with games on and adult Youtube. Child swears, calls people fat or ugly and laughs,

Or

Child B-6-Scruffy, often without shoes, clothes with paint or food down them at weekends, unbrushed hair, mainly at weekends, baths once per week

Both neglectful in their own ways. Child A needs her parents to be present more and less focus on material things. Child B needs to be actually looked after - there is no reason for a child to have to walk around with food all down themselves or basic hygiene needs not met because their parent can't be arsed with the fight of doing it (which would probably be much less of a fight if it was routine and a non negotiable). Please tell me you at least brush their teeth twice a day?!

Scruffy clothes are different to dirty clothes.
Bathing once a week is not right - try showers if they won’t bathe. That’s a terrible habit to instil in a child.

Both are really bad tbh, but the other child’s parenting sounds worse.

Standing on a wasp v painful but unlikely long term damage.

If I’m honest I’d probably judge both. Makeup at 6 is totally unnecessary, but bathing once a week does not seem ideal either. I have no experience of a specific needs child but it doesn’t sound as if this is the reason your child only bathes infrequently?

Both children are very young, just starting out in life, and have a lot more in common than you might think. The parents involved are remiss if they are not emphasising underlying commonality and encouraging their children to overlook superficial differences.

They both sound shit parents so I’d judge them both. B worse due to child neglect.

Child B sounds a lot like my own children. I judge any parent who gives their six year old a phone tbh.

But there is no reason a child should be unwashed and in dirty clothes, that's the parents job. You didn't say if the dirty beggar is polite or not? Neither seem to have great parent but clean and tidy are pretty basic.

They brush their own teeth and wash their face daily

So no. Until about 7-8 children can't and don't do a thorough job of teeth brushing and it's important an adult helps them.

Growing up in the 90’s we had a bath and washed our hair once a week on a Sunday, middle class family, fantastic parents, it’s not neglect.

Both of my children are on the spectrum, both hated washing, DD aged 16 is fine now because I tolerated the screaming over allowing her stink, even if it was every 2nd night.
I lay out the towels, sponge, bodywash, make it simple.
DS is the worst childt, physically strong, defiantly rude, but he has things that he loves and if he won't wash, they are removed, it wasn't easy to break down the walls, the alternative was allowing them form terrible habits, I've seen it before, its impossible to break when going through puberty.

She does a great job, no issues at the dentist

Obviously both are bad.

Yeah, they used to shove kids up chimneys too.
It IS neglect by today’s standards.
Stop making excuses for lazy-arsed parenting.

I would judge the parents of child A more because no 6 year old should have a phone. The child calling people fat and ugly is a horrible trait too.

However, parent B is not perfect either. Child B really needs to washed more than once per week and the hair should be brushed so it doesn't become matted. I wouldn't judge a child for having paint or mud on their clothes from playing.

That was really more the 60s and 70s but standards have changed since then. We didn't have hot water unless it was specifically heated so jumping in a bath was just not possible. By the 90s most people had hot water on tap.

To be fair, parent B also went on the internet to slag off parent A. So there's that....

Both are crappy just in different ways. It's hard to say which parent is crappier without knowing what child B's behaviour and attitude towards others is like though, as child A's attitude stinks.

I would judge parent A for crap parenting and parent B for being neglectful.

Kind and caring, but strong willed and independent

Both parents are terrible!

Id rather my child be around child B but it also sounds as though B is neglected.

B sounds way preferable to A and there’s nothing wrong with a weekly bath if she doesn’t smell

Definitely A poor thing.

One is allowed to be a kid and one isn’t.

Rubbish. Soil contains sharp stones, surprising amounts of glass fragments, and thorns and bee stings can both be pretty painful.