DH always walks ahead of me. AIBU to refuse to go on walks with him?

[Biffatcrafts]

I'm really am not sure if I am being unreasonable here or not, so please tell me if I am. And I know this is pretty stupid and small in the scale of things, but it's causing tension between my DH and I.

My DH is taller than me by quite a bit (I'm 5'1" and he is 6') so whenever we go for a walk together even if we start out side by side he always seems to stride ahead of me. It gets to the point where I feel like anyone looking at us would think we weren't actually together so great is the distance between us.

It usually gets to the point where I either have to accept that we are effectively walking separately, or I end up having to half jog in an effort to catch up and then keep a really high half jogging pace to stay beside him.

I'm 64, and whilst I am fit and healthy and capable of keeping this pace up, it's not something I want to be doing when on what is supposed to be a relaxing stroll together. (I should add here it also happens if we are just going for a walk around town window shopping, or going shopping too. In fact on any kind of activity which involves walking.)

His reply when I ask him to slow down is that he is simply walking at his normal pace, and that it happens because his legs are so much longer than mine. I can see his point, but I do feel like a little kid running after a parent sometimes.

It's driving me mad, and now I feel like what is the point of going for walks together if he isn't actually going to walk with me? He is super fit, and I do know that if he is on his own he walks very fast (he records his solo walks on Strava and I can see the distances he walks and the pace he maintains).

I've said I am happy to walk a bit faster, but that he needs to walk a bit slower too, and he has tried, but somehow he always seems to speed up and ends up ahead of me again. It's getting to the stage where I've now refused to go for walks with him because I just can't see the point if we end up walking separately. But he is upset about it and feels I am being unfair (and rejecting him) by not wanting to do this activity together.

So am I ...
YANBU to not want to do these walks with him?
YABU - I should just jog on and try and keep up!

Also, do other DHs out there do this too, and if so what have you done / said to resolve it?

My DH can do this. After a while of talking and explaining I decided that seeing as he wasn’t changing his pace just slightly for me - whereas he’ll happily slow right down for his mum or dad that I would take the call him out approach. So if he strides off I shout out “see you later” or something similar. Or if we’re out shopping etc I peel off into a shop and he can come back to find me. I have been know to just go home too. I have my keys so leave him to it. He can manage to stay at my pace once hes a bit ahead of me so it’s just fucking rude. He doesn’t like that approach so then his legs miraculously manage to slow down.

What a bunch of bollocks.

My other half does this all of the time so I taught him a lesson when we were in town one weekend . I had asked him 5/6 times to at least try and make it look like we were together,he didn't so I walked off at a 90° angle down a side street and left him to it !

We like to walk together - look around the shops

Surely you went on walks with him BEFORE you married him? Or is this a religious "cultural" thing? Genuine questions btw...

I saw a reel once about narcissism and they often stride ahead… they only count. Perhaps a bit excessive for a comment, just saying. And, haven’t read all the thread

I have the same problem with my DP and we are both 5 8",so not sure that height or leg length is a factor. Admittedly, I've always been a bit of a stroller; I like to look at everything and people watch whilst I'm walking. My OP just always walks at speed; even if he's going from the living room to the kitchen,he walks as if his arse is on fire.
When it's just me and him,I don't mind it too much as I just enjoy the environment and peacefulness. What really annoys me though, is when we go out with my and/or his, son,as his son obviously wants to interact with him,and my son wants to walk with his "step" brother,so it ends up with me being well behind,and the 2 boys running to keep up with my DP.
I understand that everyone has their own pace,but to say that you can't adapt in order to walk in time with your partner or family,is just ridiculous to me.

He's being very selfish, OP. DH and I have a similar mismatch in size and he always walks behind me so that he's not obstructing my view!

I totally get you, and my DH used to do this - was apparently unable to slow down.

Just to warn you, we did try the arm-in-arm approach and he would regularly walk me straight into puddles or wipe me off on lampposts. So I called a halt to our walks, we both walk on our own. No recriminations or rancor, I just say “I’m sorry I can’t walk with you for reasons previously explained. “