DD and Friend hurt me yet I’m in the wrong?

[FoxPj]

DD had a friend over for a sleepover last night, they are 12. During the course of the night one or both of them wrote a “horror” message on the bathroom mirror which was a shock when I went in and saw it. I went in to speak to them both and DD screamed that I was embarrassing for crying. The friend looked shocked like she’d never seen an adult show emotion before and said they had done it to her mum too who had found it funny. She did apologise but added “it’s only lipstick, it wipes off easy”. DD then stormed out and told DH that I was embarrassing her and DH has taken their side saying it was a harmless prank and I need to lighten up.
Feeling so upset today. I thought DH would at least back me up.

I need to know what the message was please op

Yep. If I was the other girls parents I would also laugh after telling op to get a grip. Kids will be even more ruthless.

It was something from the shining apparently. I don’t watch horror films and don’t appreciate them being forced on me.

I'm embarrassed for your daughter!

Unless we know what it said, we won't understand why it made you cry. Was it nasty personal abuse or copying something scary from a horror move?
If it was lipstick writing on a mirror, how is that scary?
Sorry, I hate horror films, I never watch them, and don't really understand what's going on here.

Ha, I was right. Get over it OP, you embarrassed your child, and yes, she probably will be laughed at in school in Monday.

You weren't forced to watch anything

I'd be more upset re the lipstick!.

Sorry op you've overreacted

Dramatic much? How was a horror film forced on you?

So if you don't even know what the reference was, why would it make you cry? I feel like I am missing something here.

Well as I’ve never seen the shining I didn’t immediately know it was from a film.

Good grief!
Such a dramatic overreaction- your dd probably will be laughed at for your crying over a prank. I’m really quite shocked at this tbh!

Good grief
your poor daughter
grow up 🤦‍♀️

I know this isn’t the point here, but surely 12 is too young to be watching films like The Shining?

But you knew it was the children?!

This can't be real.

I'd read the book by then, although not seen the film. The book is way scarier. I was a horror nut by 12 though. Grew out of it though.

She certainly hasn’t watched it in this house

But do you not think your reaction was extreme to burst in to tears and immediately confront them?

Surely you knew it was them and that there was no danger so you could have handled this in a way that wasn't so mortifying for your 12 year old daughter

This is hilarious 🤣

I'm sorry OP, but on the information given YABU.
What did it say that upset you so much? Crying seems an overreaction, and I'm certain would really embarrass your DD and her friend.
Did you think it was real- because I can be fairly neurotic but my first thought would be "prank."

Im not fan of horrors but it havinga quite on a mirror isnt really scary (unless you want to share what was written). You knew it was the girls so no fear. I'd have walked into her room said something like 'can you go and clean the mirror please?' And spoken with DD after and explain you didnt appreciate it.
Im struggling to see how the situation caused you to be in tears.

How did they hurt you?

Not a harmless prank though, because it upset OP.
And it may be useful for her DD to learn that actions have consequences, in this case a joke that misfired but it's the same lesson as banter - if the other person isn't laughing you shouldn't have said it....

If it is real, the whole situation is bizarre.

Your daughter should be the one cleaning it.