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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel the Disenfranchised have been Scapegoated.

181 replies

Gilead · 26/11/2025 17:28

Just fed up with a society that has become so incredibly selfish. The vilification of disabled people and the drubbing of benefit claimants whilst managing to forget that most of the people on universal credit are working families. Forgetting that most pensioners have worked and saved all their lives, some still paying tax. And let’s not forget those lazy bastards who are putting on an act in order to get a ‘free’ car.
I predicted this was the way we were headed on mumsnet in 2010. Got called all sorts of names, but, at that point in time people were a lot more understanding of the issues encountered by the disenfranchised.
If you want to come on here and tell me you don’t want to pay extra for someone else to have kids you can’t afford, research it first, look at the (myriad) reasons for this, the figures, the number of women who had extra children during the period. Then think how it would be if you suddenly became disabled, or more severely disabled.
Im off with my carer in a bit. In my Citroen C3 that actually cost me a wee bit more because I had to pay for the wheelchair hoist as well as the (approx) 350 quid every four weeks to cover the lease, and the insurance.

OP posts:
Kleeneze · 26/11/2025 20:03

crossedlines · 26/11/2025 19:09

bullshit.
People don’t begrudge support going to those in need. What people are sick to the back teeth of is working hard and paying shed loads of tax (and this includes plenty of people who have anxiety, depression and other mental health issues) to support other people who feel that their mental health entitled them to do sod all.

It does seem like there are two systems operating in the UK. There are those who are working with a ‘good’ salary but being taxed heavily so living quite a Spartan life, and those on benefits who expect cash handouts for every little thing. The workers are living in today’s Britain, those on benefits living in Britain of the past which was much wealthier.

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:03

GentleOlive · 26/11/2025 19:55

That’s absolutely scandalous. The lie that benefits are somehow frugal gets exposed over and over again.

Yes. And because she gets the benefits it opens all sorts of other discounts /support.

I work long bloody hours in a public sector job (with commuting and parking costs on top)! and she basically breezes along buying things I couldnt imagine affording

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:07

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 26/11/2025 19:55

I think you are angry at the wrong people.

I dont think i know anyone who would begrudge someone in your position financial assistance in the form of motorbility -
I certainly don't.

But the reality is there are bad actors due to the poorly designed system and i am sure you would agree not every pip claimant is legit.

Additionally, we have now got more net recipients than contributors in the uk and right now 1 in 5 working age people are unemployed or not looking for work.

It's scandalous and not sustainable...
And the people who are working are (rightly) fucked off because they are being asked to do more and give morr against the backdrop of a government who cannot control their finances despite annual taxation increasing from 830/840b to 1 trillion. They are, in their daily lives, watching these "bad actors" do fuck all while they head off to their 50 hr week job (yet the delta in household income is marginal) and it feels unfair and they feel angry.

Personally i am fucked off on behalf of people like you and who are in similar situations as i feel you are essentially victims / collateral damage due to other people in society taking the absolute piss. And the reality is there are people who do this and their number isn't insignificant.

I also predicted it would go this way ( and it will get worse)... the system is open to abuse and widely abused and the people who actually need it will be most heavily impacted as we head into darker economic times.

Edited

Exactly this. I genuinely believe in the need for a safety net. I genuinely want to help those genuinely unable to work.

But the system is being grossly distorted and exploited.

And public sector workers and others who have barely seen their salaries rise for 15 years while all other costs go up are just utterly demotivated.

DuchessDandelion · 26/11/2025 20:12

Viviennemary · 26/11/2025 19:59

Swallowed Labour propaganda more like. With their lies and fake promises of no extra taxes. Robbers.

I don't know a single Labour voter who didn't expect taxes to rise.

The conservatives robbed as blind btw, and pocketed the money themselves.

Fwiw I didn't vote Labour

Viviennemary · 26/11/2025 20:16

Viviennemary · 26/11/2025 19:59

Swallowed Labour propaganda more like. With their lies and fake promises of no extra taxes. Robbers.

I don't mind too much paying more tax if it was spent in a sensible way. But I object to supporting large families and people who would do anything to get out of actually working for a living. Anc swanning around in luxury vehicles. Not on.

Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 20:28

Gilead · 26/11/2025 19:12

@crossedlines how do you decide who has a mental illness and who doesn’t? How do you know whether or not someone is capable of work or not?

There was a woman in the question time audience recently who claimed that she gets PIP for anxiety bad enough to prevent her from working but had no problem going on tv and asking questions of politicians and robustly defending herself. I and many others who've struggled with anxiety all our lives see people like her as piss takers, if she can go on tv and debate politicians she can get a job, which btw would help her anxiety.
I know that this is just 1 example but its 1 of many and it's examples like this thats used to disparage everyone on disability benefits.
Yes certain MH conditions and severe asd mean some people cant work but far too many who could work wont even try because it would mean doing a low skilled job or 1 that they deem beneath them. I worked for decades in the hospitality industry and I've seen the entitlement and lack of work ethic grow amongst our younger generations exponentially since the Blair/Brown government's push for university education for all. We no longer teach real life skills or anything of any use anymore other than how to pass tests.
People throw about self diagnosis and shop for a dr who will agree with them instead of listening to the multiple professionals who tell them that they're normal and just going through normal life struggles (yes i know quite a few young people like this) and then theres the parents who decide that their perfectly normal child is asd because they've hit the terrible twos or tiresome 3s, there's posts on here all the time by these parents. Something needs to change in society to fix this and if that means stricter rules around what classes as a disability or how severely someone needs to be impacted to get benefits then so be it. I also believe that we need to split asd diagnoses again to differentiate between my asbergers friends, myself moderate to high functioning asd and my ds whos low functioning (yes I know outdated terminology but its more accurate than a one size fits all label)

edwinbear · 26/11/2025 20:29

HoskinsChoice · 26/11/2025 19:36

There's a difference between putting money into pensions at the normal rate and deliberately ploughing thousands into a pension purely to avoid paying higher rate tax. (Although it looks like that loophole is being closed thankfully!).

I pay a lot of money into my pension, part of that is to take advantage of the legitimate tax benefits yes. I’m also handing over about £70k a year in tax plus a new £10k a year in VAT on my kids school fees. I’m more than paying my fair share.

Gilead · 26/11/2025 20:29

JanefromLondon1 · 26/11/2025 19:21

You teach kids that anxiety is normal, everyone feels it at some point and it’s not something that means you can opt out of work or society because of it.

Anxiety to a level that has a damaging affect is not normal. It is unfair to minimise serious anxiety.

OP posts:
Gilead · 26/11/2025 20:36

@thewintergarden Nobody on benefits can buy a 50 grand BMW and this is exactly how the bad press starts and continues. There are no ‘free cars’. No discounted cars, motability is a charity who lease cars. Sometimes you can pay a non returnable deposit to get a larger car. For wheelchair Accessible vehicles there is almost always a hefty deposit and if you have a particularly large chair , a Mercedes van can be the only available option. I manage with a smaller car and hoist but if all cars are going to have a three thousand deposit, I will be housebound, again.

OP posts:
Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 20:41

GentleOlive · 26/11/2025 19:55

That’s absolutely scandalous. The lie that benefits are somehow frugal gets exposed over and over again.

Basic uc is £400.14 power month and you lose 55p for every £ you earn until you earn the full allowance.
And before you mention housing benefit that doesn't even cover your rent in most areas if you privately rent so that extra comes out of your standard uc payment, does that really sound like living the high life or raking it in?

JHound · 26/11/2025 20:46

crossedlines · 26/11/2025 19:09

bullshit.
People don’t begrudge support going to those in need. What people are sick to the back teeth of is working hard and paying shed loads of tax (and this includes plenty of people who have anxiety, depression and other mental health issues) to support other people who feel that their mental health entitled them to do sod all.

I also begrudge giving my money to those in need when their “need” arises from their poor life choices.

Kleeneze · 26/11/2025 20:48

I think everyone who watched that question time thought that woman ought to have been working. It was pretty outrageous. But that’s how brazen people have become. It’s like an article the BBC posted a while back about PIP. One of the recipients admitted that she got cash that was supposed to go towards therapy and she just spent it on bills. She didn’t even have the intelligence to PRETEND she was putting the money to the right use. It’s like she didn’t even think she was supposed to spend it on getting better. Just so brazen. And galling.

JHound · 26/11/2025 20:49

HoskinsChoice · 26/11/2025 19:36

There's a difference between putting money into pensions at the normal rate and deliberately ploughing thousands into a pension purely to avoid paying higher rate tax. (Although it looks like that loophole is being closed thankfully!).

There is nothing wrong with putting money into pensions to avoid a higher tax rate or wanting avoid the 62% tax trap between 100-120k. Those on that are harder living uber wealthy lives.

There is currently a cap on what people can sacrifice into pensions tax tree. Reducing that to TWO THOUSAND pounds is moronic. They are forcing more people to be dependent on the state instead of taking charge of their own lives.

People should he putting thousands into their pension. We currently have a huge pensions shortfall with fewer people having enough for retirement. Why on earth are you applauding that being worse? This also impacts those putting into their pension at a “normal” rate and disincentivises employer contributions. Making more dependent on the state pension.

(and people pay tax when they end up drawing their pension).

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:50

Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 20:41

Basic uc is £400.14 power month and you lose 55p for every £ you earn until you earn the full allowance.
And before you mention housing benefit that doesn't even cover your rent in most areas if you privately rent so that extra comes out of your standard uc payment, does that really sound like living the high life or raking it in?

Add a few children into the equation and someone can be getting £1500 on top of their part time job. So £3000-£3500/pcm. Bringing their income neatly in like with the net income of a £50-60k a year job. Yet if someone on MN posts that they earn £50--60k a year and are struggling they are shouted at and told this is a high income -.and indeed ,they would be paying higher rate tax on anything over £50k yet the UC recipient gets this income untaxed.

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:54

JHound · 26/11/2025 20:49

There is nothing wrong with putting money into pensions to avoid a higher tax rate or wanting avoid the 62% tax trap between 100-120k. Those on that are harder living uber wealthy lives.

There is currently a cap on what people can sacrifice into pensions tax tree. Reducing that to TWO THOUSAND pounds is moronic. They are forcing more people to be dependent on the state instead of taking charge of their own lives.

People should he putting thousands into their pension. We currently have a huge pensions shortfall with fewer people having enough for retirement. Why on earth are you applauding that being worse? This also impacts those putting into their pension at a “normal” rate and disincentivises employer contributions. Making more dependent on the state pension.

(and people pay tax when they end up drawing their pension).

Edited

I know.
I am looking at moving to the private sector (because of constant below inflation pay rises in the public sector) and my plan was to put a hefty amount into my pension so I can build up a cushion to retire early if my disability gets worse. It seems bonkers to deter people from saving to look after themselves

thatsalad · 26/11/2025 20:58

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 19:52

No , it really doesn't. I make £57k a year and my friend doing 16 hours on UC has the same income coming in as I do after tax . And she has cheaper (social) housing whereas I private rent

I'd love to see proof of that 😂

JHound · 26/11/2025 21:00

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:54

I know.
I am looking at moving to the private sector (because of constant below inflation pay rises in the public sector) and my plan was to put a hefty amount into my pension so I can build up a cushion to retire early if my disability gets worse. It seems bonkers to deter people from saving to look after themselves

Same. I increased my pension contributions partly for tax but mainly to make sure I can have a sufficient retirement as current calculations are that I will have a shortfall (and that is ignoring the fact I am not on the property ladder….)

But apparently me trying to be responsible is a bad thing and I should instead have it to the government so they can hand me back a pittance in old age.

JHound · 26/11/2025 21:01

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:54

I know.
I am looking at moving to the private sector (because of constant below inflation pay rises in the public sector) and my plan was to put a hefty amount into my pension so I can build up a cushion to retire early if my disability gets worse. It seems bonkers to deter people from saving to look after themselves

Pick your private sector well - last year I got zero payrise!

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 26/11/2025 21:01

People are pissed off at the huge amount of grifters who are sucking at the tit of the welfare state. You are not one of them but for every one of you that isn’t, there’s around five that are.

Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 21:02

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 20:50

Add a few children into the equation and someone can be getting £1500 on top of their part time job. So £3000-£3500/pcm. Bringing their income neatly in like with the net income of a £50-60k a year job. Yet if someone on MN posts that they earn £50--60k a year and are struggling they are shouted at and told this is a high income -.and indeed ,they would be paying higher rate tax on anything over £50k yet the UC recipient gets this income untaxed.

Edited

No they won't their wages are deducted from their allowance so someone working 16 hours per week is earning £195 per week or £879 per calendar month so they wont get any uc without dc other than something towards their rent.
If they have dc then their wages are deducted from their award at a rate of 55p per £1 they earn

thatsalad · 26/11/2025 21:05

Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 21:02

No they won't their wages are deducted from their allowance so someone working 16 hours per week is earning £195 per week or £879 per calendar month so they wont get any uc without dc other than something towards their rent.
If they have dc then their wages are deducted from their award at a rate of 55p per £1 they earn

Thanks! I don't get where these lies come from when anyone can use a benefits calculator online and prove this isn't true

hamstersarse · 26/11/2025 21:10

I’m sorry OP but I really hate posts like yours.

You expect everyone to have empathy with you, yet you show zero empathy for people who have put their heart and soul into a business, working hours that are most definitely illegal, only for the government to ruin their livelihoods with the stroke of a pen and a bullshit sound bite for the press.

Everyone should be united in reducing the welfare bill, it is astronomical. Even if it were cut to pre pandemic levels it would save £47 billion. There are many many many people taking the piss, it’s just fact, and posts like this don’t help this to stop,

thewintergarden · 26/11/2025 21:12

thatsalad · 26/11/2025 21:05

Thanks! I don't get where these lies come from when anyone can use a benefits calculator online and prove this isn't true

I've seen their bank statements. They earn £2k a month and get £1.5k in UC. It's not a lie. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it.

edwinbear · 26/11/2025 21:12

Hoardasurass · 26/11/2025 21:02

No they won't their wages are deducted from their allowance so someone working 16 hours per week is earning £195 per week or £879 per calendar month so they wont get any uc without dc other than something towards their rent.
If they have dc then their wages are deducted from their award at a rate of 55p per £1 they earn

But this is the issue isn’t it. They are working 16 hours a week safe in the knowledge the tax payer will pay ‘something towards their rent’. If they worked a few more hours they could pay their own rent.

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