To not really get why people don’t like clothes?

[keeponwishing]

I’m not talking about specifically liking fashion or following certain trends.

I mean in general, clothes are a personal choice. They can express who you are, there’s do much choice out there. Why people say they don’t care what they wear?

• Cost
• If you aren't taller and thin there's shit all out there
• If you're petite there's definitely shit all out there except online shopping where you have the joyous faff of buying all the things, just to have to sort out sending back 95% of it. Huge Faff.
• Current fashions, for example if you're willowy an oversized dress is fine. Short and not willowy, you look like a potato.

People who say they ‘don’t care’ about clothes do care about clothes. Everyone who jumps on to Mumsnet threads about clothes to say ‘I don’t care about clothes, it’s all a lot of silly shallow nonsense, I only wear men’s jeans with plain t-shirts and a fleece from the supermarket, I also cut my own hair and do nothing to my face except wash it’ is taking just as much of a conscious stance to look a certain way as someone who loves clothes and makeup.

They’re still using their appearance to project a specific image and reflect their personality and values, no matter how much they like to pretend otherwise.

I think people are being purposefully obtuse as they don’t like it, of course it isn’t something like if you wear black you look depressed and some universal language. That’s not what making a statement or people making assumptions about you meqns.

Here is another example. Sitting in a coffee shop. People watching.

a woman walks in with low quality clothing, a cheap fake handbag, done in primark jeans, an anorak that would make hailey in corrie swoon, a short practical hair cut, no make up, and people make an assumption about that person, low income, dowdy, frumpy a bit dull, but likely approachable. Doesn’t mean it’s accurate, just that’s what it says.

a different woman walks in after her, she’s wearing cream wool trousers, a silk blouse, carries a clearly expansive leather handbag, has swishy rich coloured well kept hair, subtle make up, a subtle scent that smells expensive. People make a totally different assumption about her. Rich. Pampered. Rich husband or parents, or successful career. Stuck up. Likely not approachable.

another woman walks in, she’s wearing faded jeans, a leather biker jacket, an old band t shirt, doc martin boots, pink hair and heavy eyeliner. people make a very different assumption about her than the other two woman. Edgy, cool. Approachable, maybe, maybe not.

none of these assumptions maybe right but it is just made up examples of how people presenting themselves snd the view strangers may have of them based on their appearance. And what people mean by your clothed making a statement,

I also wear leggings under a long dress every day. Mainly for warmth in my case because I've lived in cold houses all my life.
It would be straight leg ones from Marks with an ankle length A line pinafore dress, a long sleeved t shirt and long lace up boots.
Practical and comfortable.

For walking the dogs I wear leggings under my jeans.

I have never found friendship with people who make it clear they have zero interest in clothes or any other aspect of aesthetics. Of course when you're doing the gardening, or hiking etc etc, or clearing out the drains, you wear disgusting old things. But people who always dress only for comfort (if they have a choice) - I haven't got any friends like that. This post has made me realise this for the first time, and it is a characteristic I find off-putting in people.

I and most of my friends will buy from charity shops, eBay, markets etc etc as well as actual shops/brands. It's not about wealth-snobbery. But to not give a damn about what you choose to wear...I find that hard to understand.

I love art, architecture, the countryside, home design etc. I see clothing as part of this 'scenery' of life. I love colour and texture and pattern. I wouldn't have much in common with someone to whom all this was just nothing. I've experienced this a few times, actually. When I've been out with a colleague or someone from a hobby group (not a close friend) and I've exclaimed about a building or maybe a colour...and I've got a blank look and a shrug... I to tend to write off people like that.

a woman walks in with low quality clothing, a cheap fake handbag, done in primark jeans, an anorak that would make hailey in corrie swoon, a short practical hair cut, no make up, and people make an assumption about that person, low income, dowdy, frumpy a bit dull, but likely approachable. Doesn’t mean it’s accurate, just that’s what it says.

I would assume low income but to assume a person is 'dull but likely approachable' based on their outfit alone feels a stretch.

The examples you've given are all a bit... Cliche. Most days (when I'm not working) you'll find me in straight leg jeans, an unbranded sweatshirt and trainers. What assumptions would you make about me @Wickedlittledancer ?

What a bizarre way of thinking.

It's bloody cold and they are high waisted thick stretchy jersey fabric ones . 😁

Im also wearing knee length knitted socks.

Its really very very bloody cold.

"They’re still using their appearance to project a specific image and reflect their personality and values, no matter how much they like to pretend otherwise."

Ok. So im wearing what im wearing because they are warm and its cold. I bought them because they were cheap and warm.
You're telling me that's not why I bought them or why im wearing them, you are telling me that when choosing them I considered the image I wish to project to others and how they would reflect my personality and values?

So my personality is what? Likes to be warm when its cold out and doesn't want to spend a lot of money?

Can't believe I've got to 52 not knowing that I choose my clothes to shout to the world who I am and what I think.

What do I need to wear to tell people to fuck off and don't even think about bothering me? Thats an outfit i would really like to splash out on.

Well, exactly. I'm wearing leggings because they're comfy to lie on the sofa in, a jumper because it's November and cold, and thick socks for the same reason

Have you considered things the other way around?
That although Madame X is genuinely not concerned about projecting any image whatsoever, preferring (say) utility and comfort, good quality and a harmonious ensemble which satisfies her, it’s entirely up to YOU to own any image you decide is being thrust at you by her private, inward-facing preferences.
You will read it all according to your own assumptions.

That’s not what is being said at all.

if you went out for a coffee or drink in those clothes, as opposed to laying on your sofa or walking the dog. Your clothes would likely say a bit skint , maybe not keen on your own appearance, maybe don’t like your face or body, so just don’t want to make an effort past the practical, and depending on what they were, and how else you presented, for whatever you were doing in a social setting, would complete the assumption. The assumption could be totally wrong, but everyone’s appearance in a social setting makes a statement about them.

I understand you’re posting angrily as you hate the idea of people making assumptions about how you present, but no matter how angry you are at the thought of it, how much you lash out and swear, you won’t change it.

Very strange all the passive aggression on this thread. Reverse snobbery gone mad.

We all like different things. Some of us like to dress well and have an appreciation of quality. For some of us it matters. What is this anti-style trend all of a sudden, that none of us are allowed to aspire to more than leggings and a sweatshirt? It is possible to be warm and stylish at the same time 🙄

No. Thats not what the op is talking about.

The claim the op makes is that everybody chooses their clothes in order to make a statement about themselves, their personality and values.

Which is bollocks.

Also, im not angry. Im taking the piss. I am mocking a ridiculous claim.

It’s the anger for me, and the lashing out at the thought of it. Every single person knows we make assumptions based on how someone presents in public and every single person does it. Getting all angry about it won’t change it.

but we absolutely make diffirent assumptions about someone dressed like hailey from corrie v alexia from dynasty, or roy from Corrie in his cardie v Hugh grant in a suit, all similar ages, different dress, different assumptions. Pretending thay doesn’t happen and getting angry is just pointless.

Sigh, the conversation has moved on and when someone quotes on a thread it means they are responding to the quote er, not the op.

Because they prefer holidays

Sigh.
Yes.
I was.

I quoted it .

But they do.

Its unconscious for some though.

I am one of these people and it’s part of a broader lack of interest in aesthetics. Clothes, home furnishings, visual art. I’m not a very observant person at all and I just don’t seem to notice much what things look like 😂 I can sometimes admire or appreciate when something looks nice- like someone’s home decor or outfit. But it’s a fleeting appreciation and then I forget about it, it doesn’t make me want to create something myself. I am not artistic at all but I enjoy other forms of art, especially music.

I’ve often pondered why I’m not interested and wondered if there is something wrong with me. 😂

There is far too much choice so clothes shopping takes up too much time. There are better things to do.

We wouldn’t get on because you sound a bit of knob. Are you very young?

😂 Hahaha, no, I'm not. I'm just interested in clothing and certain fashions, that's all. My comments weren't particularly meant to be taken seriously. Enjoy your day, and may you get something positive from calling people knobs 👋

This is so weird. How self-absorbed or insecure do you have to be to assume that every single person thinks about projecting themselves, or how they might be projecting themselves?

Do you know there are people around you who don’t think about random people at all? As in, actually don’t spare a thought for what other people think? To them, all this projecting stuff is just….irrelevant. And weird. How do you have space in your head to decide what clothes you buy based on the image they project?! An uncharitable interpretation might in fact be that you’re lying, or hypocritical, dressing to “project” something! Why can’t you just wear whatever you like the look of and let that be what you project, if you’re so consumed by the image you apparently project?

Such contorted thinking. This is quite revelatory to me that people think this way!

Thats convenient. No matter what I say about my clothing I'm wrong and just don't know it, i really am choosing to express my personality, I simply don't know I am. Everyone does and if they say they don't they're wrong. 🤣.

I believe people when they say they choose clothes for personality reasons, how about accepting there are people who dont? Why must we? I've never looked at an item of clothing in my life and gone hmm yeah ok it fits me but does it really tell people my stance on the decentralisation of power or that Im an optimistic Sagittarius?

Im sorry. Im being facetious. Its just hard to take anyone seriously when they insist that every person on the planet does X and if they say they dont they're wrong, they do, they just dont know that they do