To not really get why people don’t like clothes?

[keeponwishing]

I’m not talking about specifically liking fashion or following certain trends.

I mean in general, clothes are a personal choice. They can express who you are, there’s do much choice out there. Why people say they don’t care what they wear?

I think this must be projection, that because you give mental real estate to what others see when they look at you, everyone else must too. And therefore they aren’t actually dressing to be comfortable they are dressing to look as if they dress to be comfortable. Despite the fact there’s a thread full of people saying no honestly we just value other things. People are wildly different to each other. I have to make a serious mental effort to remember to check I’ve brushed my hair and don’t have toothpaste stains on my top before leaving the house, there really isn’t any conscious or subconscious effort being made to look slovenly!

🤷🏼‍♀️it’s like a conversation. The unspoken things are as important as the spoken things.

So you never buy clothes. Someone does it for you and you just put on in the morning the closest thing to hand with no thought?

everyone’s appearance in a social setting makes a statement about them

I think this is something you're projecting because you feel that your own clothing makes a statement about you.

Not everyone is the same as you. I'm wearing what I'm wearing because it's cold and I want to be comfortable. You may assume it's because I don't like my appearance, or because I'm insecure, or skint - but the actual reason is because I want to be warm and comfortable and that's more important to me than looking a certain way or dressing to impress random strangers.

This is interesting. I love clothes and always have done, even when I was morbidly obese. I’m now hovering on a bmi of just overweight but I’m massively enjoying buying and wearing clothes and thinking about what outfit to wear each day. For those interested I’m currently in a taupe cardigan from next and a burgundy pair of flared cords from M&S. I like to think of the image that im projecting - for work it’s to be professional and elegant, sometimes a bit edgy, sometimes classic and sometimes something else. That’s the beauty of clothes, we can be different people just by changing an outfit.
I also love shoes (though no heels these days), boots, have a bad adidas addiction and love my vintage mulberry. I love jewellery and have loads as I spent way too much money on it (at the cost of a pension which I don’t give a shit about because I like to work and have a few side hustles).
i didn’t realise that people were judging me for being vain and shallow - interesting, since I have a PhD in biochemistry and my equally clothes and make up and jewellery obsessed best friend has one in civil engineering.
I don’t really judge those with different interests to me, but maybe I will start now 😂

Thinking about this further, do you think that everyone who sees you actually looks at you, stops thinking about whatever they’re thinking about and reflects upon the image you’re seeking to project by your choice of clothing? Do you think your choice of clothing for yourself is that important?!

That’s so interesting because I don’t look good in v necks and I feel like all the plus size clothes are v neck. My main reason for losing weight is so I can find a different neck line!

Yes I am with you OP I enjoy looking for and picking out clothes in colours and styles that suit me. I find it a creative outlet in the same way I love make up. I think the internet has meant I have never had such lovely clothes in natural fabrics. So much choice! One of the aspects I didn’t like in the careers I had was when I had to wear a uniform.

Ibuy clothes. But keep my everyday wear limited to comfort and practicality so I don't have to think about it. I just pick up and wear what's clean and wrinkle free.

The only time I'll think twice about what to wear is if its an occasion that calls for dressing up, that part is stressful and time consuming.

Hmm, Its not about I think my clothes make a statement about me, more people make assumptions based on how I present myself if they interact with me and don’t know me. Even if it’s split second;

No I don’t think it is projecting, if it was then no tv program of film would remotely have to think about wardrobe for its characters, as it would be irrelevant how they dressed.

They could have women walking around the Corrie set in expensive silk designer wear and could have had folks in primark clothing on the set of dynasty. The fact they don’t, and are dressed in character, says it is not projection.

Your argument is they could have they in fact should do that , and it makes no difference and people don’t make assumptions based on how you present, and your clothes say nothing about you. I simply disagree with you and think absolutely the way we dress says something about us.

but I understand some people hate that idea, and it makes them angry, and as much as you like to think your clothes just say you want to be warm, they don’t.

but I understand some people hate that idea, and it makes them angry, and as much as you like to think your clothes just say you want to be warm, they don’t.

They only say other things to people who care about things like that, though. And not everyone does, as is clear by the answers to this thread.

You've decided that what people wear is important and says XYZ about them. That's fine - but why can't you understand the other people feel differently, and don't make the same assumptions as you?

As an aside, I don't think I've ever really noticed what people wear on TV programmes and whether it "fits" with anything or not. They're just clothes.

I'm not "angry" either - I just don't understand your arrogance in thinking everyone has to be the same as you.

Feels like this whole thread is people talking past each other. No one has said that people don’t make assumptions based on clothes, they’ve said they don’t worry about what assumptions other people make about them based on clothes. Or enjoy or spend time planning what to wear because of that rather than other concerns.

And once again the example seems to boil down to richer people wear more expensive clothes.. income is not the most interesting detail about most people.

I genuinely don't think twice about what anyone else thinks of my clothes. I do what I do for my own comfort and ease. I wear what I am comfortable in wearing in terms of what the fabric and fit feels like. Not about how it will look to others.

I don't understand why people find that difficult to understand.

The only time I think twice is when dressing up on special occasions. But even then it's about finding what looks good on me for me, not for anyone else.

I aim for clean, and comfortable.
Which for me is leggings and tunic length tops.
Beyond looking clean/comfortable I care very little about fashion which for the most part I find offensive due to environmental impact and waste.

I guess my position is I’ve never ever met someone genuinely disinterested in their appearance, I have met people who don’t like their appearance, face, body, so don’t give clothes much thought past what fits, is comfy and fits the bill, or have no money so focus on similar as it’s a make do situation. And I’ve met many people from many walks of life. But none who don’t care what they wear, just reach into the wardrobe, don’t care what they buy, don’t care if two bits of clothes go together, don’t care what others think of them, but it appears mumsnet is awash with such people.

Yes, precisely.

I'm sure people do judge me on what I wear but it doesn't bother me. I have autism and pick my clothes based on texture and what I can tolerate first and foremost - comfort comes second, then practicality - looks only come after that, and mostly don't matter at all.

I have a uniform of leggings (fleece lined in winter), loose t-shirts (long-sleeved in winter) and jumpers (hoodies when it's really cold) and oodies. That's it, really.

Clothing is one part of making an assessment of a person and the extent to which this contributes to the assessment varies by person.

You appear to put more weighting on this than most or at least most in the thread. For example, you mentioned earlier you would be able to assess whether someone is approachable or not based on their clothing. I wouldn't.

I'm not saying I'm right and you're wrong (or vice versa). But I do think you're projecting the way you feel onto others in this thread.

No no, I’ve said several times when someone doesn’t know the person and has to interact with them, I fully agree many other factors, but the comments are simply in context of this conversation.

I've read this several times and I'm not sure what you mean, sorry.

Based on your comments on this thread it's clear to me that you place more emphasis on what someone is wearing when you're making an assessment of them than most people do.

I'm not saying that to be offensive or contrary, but to point out that we're all different in how we interpret the world and that's fine.

Those who care very little for clothes...

Why not drift about in a pair of tasseled velvet loon pants and an 80’s shiny jersey top with humongous shoulder pads?

l mean they’re just clothes after all…it doesn’t matter what they look like.

It matters to me what they feel like on my body. And those items would not feel comfortable to me.

Because they wouldn't feel right to me. The texture of velvet makes me want to be sick, and jumpers need to fit me in a certain way or I feel incredibly uncomfortable.

Then you’re misunderstanding, I suspect deliberately. Personally I don’t give a shit what people wear. I really don’t; but in the context of this thread and this thread alone, yes I absolutely believe people make assumptions based on appearance when they have to interact with someone they have no other knowledge of. If you want to say this makes me shallow or I do it more than others, then crack on.🤷🏻‍♀️

Of course people make assumptions that's not what's up for debate.

The point is that many of us don't care what other people assume about us. If someone thinks I don't care about my appearance because I'm wearing leggings and an oversized hoody then that's on them - I don't give a shit as long as I'm comfortable.

For me, clean, comfortable and appropriate for the occasion is important. What I don't enjoy is the selecting of clothing. So I keep it very simple. Ditto, haircuts. They are functional too, and not something I think about too much either. People might form an opinion based on my choices, but I don't set out to express myself deliberately.