To think skid marks are not normal?!

[Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

SD’s shitty pants are really, really revolting😫

It’s not normal for a ten year old, is it???

Do they have bidets in school toilets now?

I won’t be:

• getting her to use “flushable” wipes
• getting her to use wet wipes then put them in the bin
• bagging up her dirty laundry to return to her mum’s (who does this??)

I will be:

• speaking to her in private to find out if there’s a problem at school or at her mum’s
• binning particularly offensive or stained pairs
• buying a load of cheap ones

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Good decisions IMO OP.

sounds perfect.
please do read the eric website, they're the children's bowel and bladder charity and have so much good advice - there's a whole section about exactly this issue:
https://eric.org.uk/childrens-bowels/soiling/

Wet wipes and then into the bin, anyone who uses only toilet paper has a dirty arse no matter how much they wipe.

Could you try laugh about it. It's a very humiliating prospect if you're 10.

Why does skid marks equal problems at her mum's? Can you just think about her and address the real issue? With a laugh and not so serious.

I know kids can itch their ass so viciously that the pants are virtually eaten up by their undies. A light-hearted approach will help.

I have needed those wipes you flush. They're great for anyone. I imagine many people walking around in their respectable clothes and veneer of importance and decency - have a shitty arsehole 🤗

I wouldn’t discount it being constipation. Children often don’t want to use the toilets at school so they’ll withhold and because they’re constipated it causes soiling. I’d get her parent to speak to her and try to keep a diary for the doctor and then make a GP appointment.

OP you come across really crass here in the way you are describing the behaviour of a little girl.

No!! Wet wipes are not the answer. No one should be using and flushing wet wipes. In fact, wet wipes should be banned, full stop

Not particularly unusual for that age in my opinion

Poor kid x

Going to the toilet at school is difficult i worked in schools. Lots of children trying to go at the same time. Larking around or not enough time. Often no paper. If your body wants to go outside of the break times..tough. kids hold on and this can make marks.... a conversation about how feasible is it to go at school. Always have personal tissues in pocket etc. I was always really sorry for the kids they were afraid to speak up and ask to go. Secondary school actually locked them at lesson time. Secondary school other kids hanging around so embzrrassed to make odour etc.

There are no flushable wet wipes.

Wet wipes must be the wrong word. Wipes for your flange/ass that are slightly moist compared to toilet tissue.

I will concede that these could be bad for the environment even if they don't block the bog.

DS12 does this when he's constipated. I bin the underwear if it's too gross.

Lucky you! menopause brought me horrendous bleeding and I have bled directly into the loo on many occasions.

I wasn't even talking about that though. I mean when you've had a wee, changed pad/tamppn/emptied cup (into what?) and you wipe blood. Toilet tissue with period blood on it is fine to go in the loo.

The lack of mention of period blood in the phrase gives "we can't mention the monthly curse" and pearl clutching vibes.

The popular phrase used to be "natural waste and toilet tissue". Perfect.

I think some are marketed as flushable but the recent information in the news has been that they should NOT be marketed as such, as they do not break down in the sewage system.

The structure of the tissue needs to be more robust if it is to hold moisture, and it is that structural difference which causes the problems.

If you think about it, damp toilet tissue would be a soggy mess if sold in packets, so there is a distinct difference in their make-up.

Not if you put them in the bin. There’s also flushable biodegradable ones.
Sounds like you’re resigned to scrubbing those skiddies!

Her dad tried teasing? Can you give some examples as I’m not sure what you mean.

Then I’d say maybe time to consider she is not doing this on purpose or by being lazy and as others have suggested she has constipation issues. My son has the same issues with constipation, overflow, and marks on his pants.

Your tone is coming across as you don’t like her very much and there’s absolutely no sympathy I can see. She’s clearly embarrassed by trying to hide it and getting defensive, she probably feels shame and she needs some empathy, not your current approach. Maybe a gentle chat would be the better approach, though sounds better to come from her mum or dad.

That makes sense. It's a shame as they have been helpful with the ass wiping debacles we may have here. It's been good for me at times too.

Maybe bidets are the answer again. Toilet tissue seems so unsuitable. But what you describe doesn't feel right to even try anything moist and down the loo again.

Yes it's a shame!

Even toilet paper with aloe Vera and similar doesn't flush well in my toilets.
I don't know if you have access to a health visitor who might be able to advise you on bowel issues. Because if there's a physical problem buying multiple new knickers isn't going solve it.
And if there's a physical problem you have the sympathy of everyone who has had to deal with the frustration of trying to sort it out. But help is available.

Contact your water company/local sewage treatment works. Flushable has no legal meaning and would not stand up in a court of law.

Could she have threadworms and be scratching herself?
I only ask because I was like this when I was 9 because the itching was constant but much worse on an evening.
Maybe worth getting checked out?