I need to know if I’ve been unreasonable with my best friend…. 3 weeks ago, my she called me at 10pm. I don’t usually pick up at that time but her dad has been quite poorly so I was concerned something had happened. She asked if I was in bed and I said yes. She then said there was a big spider in her bathroom and asked if I would come and get it out of the house for her. We’ve been friends for 20 years and I’ve gone every time she’s asked me previously, however, my toddler had been poorly for a few days and me and my husband had barely slept. I get up at 5.30am for work, and she lives a 15 minute drive away, so it’s likely it would have been 45 minute round trip and I wouldn’t get back until around 11pm. I asked where her cats were (they’ve been handy at getting spiders for her the last couple of years) and she said “they’ve gone to bed for the night”. I asked her to get the cats out of bed to try and get the spider, if that didn’t work and she was still desperate, to call me back and I would go over. I didn’t hear anything else that night.
I messaged her the next day to ask how she got on but she sent a “fine” response. I messaged her again a few days later and she said she was really upset with me for “fucking her off” and also said “I’ve never felt so alone in that moment”. I apologised and explained to her why I was so tired that night, so asked her try something else before getting me out of be, but she didn’t want to hear it and stopped responding to my messages. 3 weeks later, she still hasn’t been in touch. I’ve tried to see things from her POV but I guess I just don’t understand how she’s fallen out with me over this! I hate the silent treatment and find it cruel and manipulative but now I’m wondering if I really have been unreasonable?