So dh has somewhat unpredictable hours. He can get called out quite late and be home in the very early hours for example. I have a straight forward 9 to 5.
Im 27, dh is 32.
Previously if I knew dh was working late or if he got called out I would arrange going out with friends. We have made the move out to the suburbs so it’s a bit of a commitment to go into the city (40 min train journey). Dh says he happy for me to meet friends when I do this. The only issue when I go out I am out for a while due to the commute. So occassionaly dh will unexpectedly come back home quite early whilst I am out until midnight (is the norm). So we miss those few hours where we can be together.
But tbh Ive just found that my relationship does much better if I just don’t bother going out anymore. Ie I literally sit at home and wait for dh. I don’t think dh is deliberately treating me differently. But it’s obvious we are much more lovey and dovey with this new situation. Dh will come straight over to me and express gratitude for my waiting for him. But it does mean I am frequently bored and home alone.
I almost feel a bit ashamed that I am literally just sat around waiting for my husband. That is not how I normally operate. But if it works it works I guess.
I don’t know whether to swallow my pride or question why dh is so much more lovey when he has a wife who hangs around waiting for his return. I mean obviously I would also prefer to not come home to an empty house if I were him.