To think the problem with wealth inequality is that rich people don't know how rich they are?

[Neeroy]

Article in the Times today saying that people earning six figures 'don't feel rich'.

Because they are surrounded by six figure earning peers they are comparing themselves to people who have more rather than the 90% of the population that have far less. This is why the budget is poorly received in the news, because rich people think they already shoulder too high a burden when in fact compared to everyone else they still have far more disposable income. Even if they have to cut down on the number of holidays they go on. They aren't sitting in the dark under a blanket. Or only making food that doesn't require turning on the oven.

I don't think they realise how so many people have to live.

www.thetimes.com/article/1fb46414-8f65-436f-8f95-451d69626148?shareToken=8061d939633164c0dfbd805240c8e008

That problem for many of the high earners is easily solved - they mostly transition by becoming zero hours contractors - picking and choosing the work they do. Dh’s ex boss used to charge £4k a day for jobs he didn’t want and £1.5k for the jobs he did want, he didn’t need the money - these kind of people will always be in demand.

I don’t prioritise my work over my children. Obviously. I worked part time when they were small but they did go to nursery 3-4 days a week so I could continue my career. It was a good decision as both DH and I have both been made redundant twice and it means we’ve been able to continue paying the mortgage whilst one of us was out of work. They are teens now and spend a lot of time out with their friends or doing their sports, so I’m now working FT again.

The income I’ve earnt has put them through private school, paid for school ski trips/sports tours/nice holidays. They will leave Uni debt free and both will have deposits for a house. DH is usually home from work about 6pm so the kids are alone for a maximum of 1.5hrs a day - that’s if they’re not at after school sports clubs. I’d feel I’d done a poor job of raising them if two 14-16 year old NT kids couldn’t manage 1.5hrs on their own after school each day whilst their parents travel home from work.

Am I shaming them? Good. My children were, and still are, far more important to me and their dad the money

I'm not sure that's what I said. I believe I said that yes people have different expenses but being in a position where you have a £3k mortgage means you are rich enough to have got enough of a deposit together to buy the house and a high enough salary to get the £3k mortgage. That in itself is a decision the rich get to make that the rest of us don't.

I agree those two houses have different values depending on where they are in the country but to be able to make the choice to buy a two up two down in London for £750k is a decision rich people get to make. That is what people are struggling to understand.

I don't live in London because I can't afford to. My previous career would have progressed greatly if I'd worked in London. But I couldn't afford to live there so I took a sideways step and will never achieve £100k salary. Those are the sorts of choices non rich people have to make.

Rich is being able to make a decision to take on a £3k mortgage and not knowing how rich you are compared to the rest of the population is complaining that having such a high mortgage leaves you with not much at the end of the month. Like the rest of us but from a relatively much lower starting point.

So they get a couple of hours?

Fingers crossed your adults kids have identical stance as you

heaven help them if not

Thank you. Despite our differences, I actually like you. We’re just different 😊

He will never not work I think. But there’s a lot he can do for himself or even a couple of days a month/week - when he’s really old that is!

What are holidays like for him?

Thank you! you guys sound like lovely parents!

During the week yes, but DH is home at 6pm, on the 3 days a week he’s in the office. The other 2 days he’s WFH. I’m here all weekend obviously, but this afternoon DD has gone to the cinema with her friends and DS is out on a run. At 14 & 16 they really don’t want to be joined at the hip to their mum.

Thanks 😊. X

We arrive in the hotel room and he sets up his screens! But he isn’t working all day he just checks on stuff every so often

And actually, DD gets home later than me on Mondays & Thursdays as she plays netball. DS is at his local athletics club Tuesdays & Thursdays and also gets home after me. Obviously they could drop those if they desperately felt they needed to see more of me, but they don’t seem keen to.

I was SAHM mum. Now I'm just a receptionist at my local dentist. I work PT. My kids are grown now.

DH earns the big bucks at EY and provides for us. He works very hard.

Why? I love them regardless. They know that. We are all mature enough to know that we can’t agree on everything. I told my youngest son that if he voted Labour instead of the SNP, he should never darken my door again. He just laughed and said “ see you tomorrow mum, after I’ve voted Labour” 🤣

I'm currently in from work eating a cheese and pickle sandwich (not turned oven on) sitting under a blanket because I'm cold 🤣

you would judge them very negatively and be happy if they felt “shame” if you adopted same stance as on this thread

Are you happy @percypiggy200 ?

I feel too often on MN there's politics on envy. I remember a thread a few years ago where people were upset about how high the bonuses are in finance.

DH earns (good) 6 figures. We live in a 3 bed terrace, haven’t been abroad for three years, our baby DD won’t have her own bedroom, we have one cheap leased car. Our house has a tiny paved yard, with no garden. We won’t get free nursery hours because of DH’s earnings so need to find £1600 a month for nursery (and that’s fine, a line needs to be drawn somewhere). We have a big mortgage because we don’t live far from London, but we have to live here because it’s commutable for our London based jobs. Our pension pots are small because of sick leave, unemployment, nursery bills for DC1 and DH starting a new career at 30. We’re certainly not able to pump loads in to our pensions for the tax relief.

We don’t come from wealthy families and are state educated, so have no capital or private wealth. I earn an average salary. Because we didn’t come from well off families we saved up our own (modest) house deposit, so missed the era of low interest rates and have high housing costs. We are unlikely to be able to afford a third child.

DH earns well but it’s long hours, stressful, takes him away from home and he spends huge amounts on travel.

We’re fortunate in that we can afford good food, the heating bill and to pay for days out and extra curricular activities for the DC. But we’re not rolling in it. The only people we know who seem genuinely flush are our small handful of friends with millionaire parents who bought them a house to avoid IHT and couples where they both earn seriously big money. None of this is to say “woe is us”- we know we’re better off than 95% of the population- but it doesn’t go far nowadays.

Exactly. I hope labour don't increase your taxes.

Look I don't disagree. I know I'm fortunate.

However in this example I'm actually comparing literally the same house, or say 3 houses right next to each other. One recently mortgaged, one mortgaged 20 years ago, one social rented.

Those houses cost vastly different amounts (thousands) in terms of monthly cashflow. Even if you just look at interest i.e. the rent equivalent.

And it doesn't buy any extra utility - there's no lifestyle inflation involved in living in number 21 vs 23 vs 25. You're all on the same house in an equally nice street equally close to London's amenities etc etc.

I don't disagree that money gives options, I'm not saying I'm on the breadline, etc, I'm just reacting specifically to your earlier point in the thread about how it is not reasonable to consider disposable post-housing income only. I agree if we're talking about someone who says they're cash poor because they bought a mansion but that isn't the example I'm talking about here.

Some people have an avoidant attachment style and having to spend time with their children is actually pretty difficult. A lot of these people will have very good jobs and will pay for nannies to give the children what they can't.

I have known plenty of people like this (I used to work for a bank in the City).

It is hard to overcome an avoidant attachment style. It makes sense for these people to prioritise working hard and paying for childcare.

@ForJadeQuoter they probably will.

We understand why- the country is broke and millions live in poverty, but it’s a bit annoying when our friends who both earn £80k+ each and have a far smaller mortgage than we do because they have more family money get free nursery hours and we don’t. But there you go, a line has to be drawn somewhere.

If DH stays healthy and working we’ll end up very well off. But the money while our DC were little would’ve been nice, and it would’ve been nice for them to have a house with a garden.