Important hello for everyone

[FriendlyHedgehogMeow]

Hello mumsnet people

Ok I did as you suggested. The HT wasn't impressed, but I was only trying to demonstrate what my DS was doing with the pen. I'm sure she'll still be able to work with one eye. I should of, sorry should have been more careful. Hoping to get off with community service.

Well of course you'll need IVF and that's a waste of valuable resources which should be reserved for younger, childless women.

YABVVVVU and extremely selfish.
I've changed my mind.

That’s fair enough. You were just standing up for your child. You’re a great mum

Thanks hun

Fair enough. I’ll use a surrogate. Thanks Hun

Omg!! It can’t be said enough!!!! Cancel the cheque!!!!!

That's okay lovely.

My neighbour's keen on becoming a surrogate. Can I PM you with her phone number? She says she'll only charge you £45,000.

Well the apple didn't fall far from THAT tree did it Missy ?
Is it any wonder kiddies today are feral when their primary care providers go round POKING the Head Teacher in the eye with a pen?

And I hope it was your pen not the schools one , they cannot possibly use that covered in vitreous humor (that 's the jelly stuff in your eyeball. I;m not an Optician but I did pay attention in school , obvs )
My tax payers money will be funding a new Steadler Stick ( other brands are readily available )

If it's your pen just wipe it clean on the hem of your skirt

That’s no problem, I can use my PIP and UC benefits

That's a really good idea!

You'll be happy to hear that it was my pen. I quickly wiped it on my flesh coloured leggings. You know, the camel toe ones. I hope the glass eye doesn't use up too much of your taxes.

Do you have much left after your 3 month holiday in the Maldives?

I’ll be back when the two child benefit cap is scraped in the Budget. Kerching!

Maui babes, only place for Disney Princess a like me… jell?

Is it OK to take my four children out of school for two weeks to go to Disney, then?

Best to leave them at home. They can look after themselves if they are school age.

Glass Eye ? She can have an eye patch , I;m not made of money !

And at least the jelly won't show up on your skin tone leggings .

Do you stuff the pen into your Long White Sports Socks/Sliders combo?

I keep the pen in my junkie bun actually.

Course it is , it's Eddyoukayshunull innit ?

Ahh , your ciggie is tucked behind your ear so I suppose its the only option ?

My alter ego has gone to bed. I'll pass your message on tomorrow x

I suspect this is a reverse.

Don’t feed the troll

CF!!

This thread has been derailed. Why don't people read the OP's updates?!