Important hello for everyone

[FriendlyHedgehogMeow]

Hello mumsnet people

Netmums is that way ➡️

I've also stalked you and I now know your car registration number. And the fact that you're running a bawdy house from your second home in Littlehampton.

Send £10,000 immediately or the facts go to the police. And the Daily Mail. And the BBC. And the King.

I blame Meghan Markle

No, it will make little Tarquin cry, and I don't want to upset my neighbours and have them ruin my newly laid lawn with their BMW.

Hang on… is this hello important enough for the naice ham?? I pop to Waitrose and get us all some picky bits. I am SO invested!

What about all the people who can’t afford naice ham from Waitrose. Rub their noses in it why don’t you.

They can eat cake?

And us vegetarians !
How offensive can you be ?

Clutches fake pearls

UPF? Are you mad?

I can't survive on £70k, £80k, £90k, £100k.....£150k!

I’m barely scraping by on 100k … I may have to let the second cleaner go next week.

I’ve heard she doesn’t dust the skirting boards anyway so no loss there.

"Money talks, wealth whispers" - eek

I am on £150k. Going to to leave my job and claim benefits. Can't wait to have a better quality of life.

I’m not entirely sure where your intel is from, she does them thrice daily, I’m not sure how I will manage without her.

Where has OP gone? Maybe she was distracted by someone having sex in her hedge

What? Penis beaker? Dare I ask…..?!

Be careful OP. This could end up in the Daily Fail!

No, probably best that you don;t .

Can you pass the Dragon Butter over ?

I don't know how you cope - shall I set up a Go Fund Me for you ?

I slept with a mumsnetters husband and i know her user name.
Her husband told me.
Ive read all her threads.

cat tax. Just saying.

To be honest it’s not that hard to make extra money you just need to take in some ironing. Then you can finally get a break by booking a spa weekend.

Does your oh have one on his bedside table? It’s an extremely practical way to dip and clean said penis post coitus. No noisy bathroom trips. 🥳

A surfeit of mangoes is a 1st world problem.

So glad you are actively looking to remove those tight diamond shoes.