DSis is skimping on Christmas because she’s obsessed with her Skye trip?

[LydiaRidesAgain]

DSis has announced on the family chat that she’s doing a smaller Christmas this year so she and BIL can save for their big Isle of Skye holiday next summer.
Fine in theory, except last year she happily accepted the tasteful and expensive pile of gifts I bought for them both, and now I am apparently only getting a little token.

DM has already chimed in with something about memories meaning more than materialistic things which pissed me off.

AIBU to think she can save for her holiday without cheaping out on me and the rest of the family?????

Is this a reverse?

Just spend less on your sister’s family 🤷‍♀️ and use the money saved to buy what you and your family would like.

So she’s announced this well in advance, so that if you take a ‘matched value’ approach to Christmas presents you’ve got plenty of time to factor it in.

I don’t quite follow the issue, or what last years present budgets have to do with this years if tgeres been a discussion on the topic inbetween.

I’m not sure why you’re mentioning last year in relation to this year.

Regardless of what you did last year is it not okay to scale back for this year?

What did she get you last year?

She's told you so you can adjust your spending for this year to correlate so you're not spending as much on them. So you just cut back as well.

Nothing unreasonable or unusual in that. They've identified a savings goal and are working to meet it and being up front about what they can do. Yabu.

Just say ‘great, let’s set a budget for presents then’, it’s fair all round then?

Did she give you something commensurate with what you gave her/her family last year?

She's telling you early - what's the issue? She isn't one of these people who expect something massive and expensive from you but only give you a little cheap thing themselves.

I honestly don’t see what the complaint is. Just buy her something small. I applaud her actually. You are all adults and can buy what you want and need for yourselves rather than expecting expensive presents.

Suggest no presents for adults or a secret Santa this year

Last year was last year. Just follow suit this year and give token gifts / only gifts for the DC. As much as anything else, a lot of people find the whole process of buying gifts for adults, often just for the sake of it, expensive and stressful - this is an opportunity to take stock and rein it in a bit.

Is there some sort of weird Christmas present troll? This is very similar to the 'cutla quid' thread...

‘Oh that’s lovely, makes sense to free up money for a lovely holiday instead. We’ll be doing the same, let’s just do small gifts this year or we could do a secret Santa?

Then spend the money you would have on her gift on yourself. Easy.

Yes - as per Martin Lewis' great suggestion about a 'pre-NUP': an agreement for No Unnecessary Presents between adults.

Yanbu, of course she should have a crap holiday where she's worrying about money so you can have a massive Christmas present. That's what it's all about after all.

It's not even like she announced it in plenty of time or anything.

I have reported already on exactly that basis

Skye is beautiful, she'll have a lovely time.

I’ve bought everything second hand for Christmas this year to put more money into my savings account 😄

Just all agree to spend less. Everyone’s a winner. They’ve told you now so that you can spend less too, not left it to Christmas Day for you for get your tenner gift after you’ve spend £50 on them.

Did she not get you enough last year and you wanted her to feel guilty and get you more ? What is wrong with you 😕

What's last year got to do with it? Spend less on her this year too

Good for her.

Another one?

Don't blame her you're all adults if you want something buy it yourself

It’s not being obsessed to want a nice holiday, or to cut back on unnecessary expense to do so. She’s given plenty of warning and won’t be expecting something spendy from you which is why she’s told you.

Just agree not to buy for each other at all. Will solve all these kind of issues.