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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Step daughter wanting help to gut her house and in not happy to help

131 replies

Lola234456 · 09/11/2025 22:14

I'm unwell and have a demanding physical job three long days a week, step daughter shall we say is very not houseproud barely does housework and I'm fairly disgusted with how she lives in her rented property, her dad often comments, both herself and her partner have good well paid jobs but they would simply rather goout or play computer games, she has a check by property mananger Thurs I have a long shift at work weds but am after after working two long days Mon and Tues in which I intend to spend one day cleaning and one day food shopping and relaxing, am I wrong to say no I won't spend my day off going and gutting her out I really wouldn't know when or where to start!!!

OP posts:
Slightyamusedandsilly · 12/11/2025 12:08

Lola234456 · 12/11/2025 10:10

Update!, he's gone to clean to find out she says she felt down yesterday so went out with friends instead of attempting a start on cleaning, he says he's annoyed let's see

She feels down because she lives in a shit hole.

The laziness of it beggars belief.

MrsSkylerWhite · 12/11/2025 12:09

WelshRabBite · 09/11/2025 22:22

I think this is an important “consequences of their own actions” time.

They made the mess, they clean the mess.

Not sure how this is supposed to be your problem 🤷‍♀️

This.

No is a sentence.

LushLemonTart · 12/11/2025 23:55

@Lola234456 hope dh wasn't too grumpy?

Popadomorbread · 13/11/2025 00:02

Myself and DH used to be awful and keeping the house clean and tidy but we would never had asked or expected help from anyone else to clean for us. Horrendous behaviour. We now have a cleaner which has the dual purpose of us having a nice clean house and we have to keep it tidy for them to clean. It’s also allowed us to get in great habits with resetting every night. Putting washing straight away etc… difference is we never expected anyone else to have to sort this for us. Or buy us cleaning products. Seriously leave them too it. They need to be responsible for their own actions and if that means learning the hard way so be it.

Lola234456 · 13/11/2025 00:38

LushLemonTart · 12/11/2025 23:55

@Lola234456 hope dh wasn't too grumpy?

He came in knackered lol but was understanding of me not helping and no grumps!!! ,turns out boyfriend done nothing to help clean next time I see him I will be having words😁

OP posts:
LushLemonTart · 13/11/2025 01:01

@Lola234456 what a lazy sod the bf is! He should be ashamed.

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