AIBU to think this tutor has an attitude?

[SoCloseToNothing1981]

First time posting on here (long-time lurker). I'm not sure what I'm looking for here tbh, maybe just a hand-hold or just (brutally) honest opinions, but I'm just feeling a bit weird about a Zoom call I had with my DS' history tutor yesterday. I might be overreacting but it's just left a bad taste in my mouth.

Me and DH decided to get DS a tutor for GCSE History. He's in Year 11 and he's had a bit of a shit time with the course. When he was choosing his options in year 9, his history teacher did recommend that he do geography instead because his essay-writing and memory surrounding dates was not good (he did roughly the same in terms of achievement in both history and geography). The thing is he is interested in it, but he just can't remember key dates very well. The thing is he wants to do history at A Level. I feel bad for him because he likes the subject, but he's just not very good at it and obviously that's problematic if he is considering this subject as a potential academic or career pathway.

So we meet this tutor and he says in our initial meeting with him that tutoring is to complement ongoing revision. I don't agree with this because I view tutoring as teaching my DS how to revise. The tutor says that he likes to do a baseline assessment with the students so he can determine their areas they need work on, which again I found a bit overkill because why are you already testing DS when you haven't taught him how to revise yet?? We scheduled a lesson for later that week, but DS was running a little bit late as he'd woken up late so we only had 30 minutes of a lesson with the tutor (it's all done on Zoom). DS thought he had been working on the Cold War that week in school and so the tutor set him some questions on the Cold War. DS, bless him, really struggled with the first question so didn't have time to look at the rest of the questions. The tutor ran through the questions with DS, and that was when DS realised he hadn't actually done the Cold War and he'd gotten the name confused with something else.

The tutoring has been going on for 2 months, and the tutor scheduled a Zoom call with me to basically tell me that we may want to reconsider choosing History as an A Level option. This really caught me off guard, and it came across as him telling me how to parent my child! He said that there are loads of issues regarding essay-writing and analysing sources and interpretations, and whilst he is totally happy to support DS with this he can't ignore the fact that if these skills aren't being mastered in Year 11 history then this is going to severely set DS back when he starts Year 12. I ask the tutor about what revision methods he has taught DS, and the tutor said that the subject knowledge is a key area of weakness, and DS apparently said to him that he doesn't make notes in the lessons because his teacher isn't good. I said to the tutor that I think DS just needs to be taught how to create his own quizzes, and how to create flashcards and mindmaps. The tutor said that with mocks coming up those "knowledge gaps" need to be filled in. But I'd prefer him to prioritise teaching DS how to revise history, and if I'm asking for a particular service surely I should receive it?

So, AIBU to think this tutor has a bit of an attitude and is overstepping the mark a bit? I don’t need him to tell us which subjects DS should or shouldn’t do at sixth form, I just want him to teach DS how to revise properly!

There's no indication of that from what she's described. He sounds completely disengaged, has no aptitude for history and hasn't paid attention in any of the lessons for the last year and a bit. Not liking history and being lazy isn't a SEN.

Tutor here. The giveaway to me is when the OP said:

'....and if I'm asking for a particular service surely I should receive it?'

This epitomises the infuriating situation I've faced countless times. The over-ambitious parent envisages an unrealistic outcome. The parent then thinks by enlisting the services of an educational professional, that educator is then an 'employee' of the parent, and who must bend to the parent's demands and deliver what is expected.

In other words 'I'm paying you, so see to it that you do it.' Then when the whole venture falls embarrasingly flat on its face, the tutor who has failed to fulfil expectations, is a convenient scapegoat.

In fact long ago I'd learned to treat the slightest whiff of 'Oh he's / she's been through so many tutors and we're trying to find a good one who knows how to teach...' as a huge red flag and I try to side step it as diplomatically as possible by saying that I'm too busy to help.

Except in this case they've hired a uni student. Not even a proper tutor. Poor lad has my sympathy! He had no idea what he was walking into.

Exactly this. Every exam board has a different focus. AQA, Edexcel, OCR, WJEC. If the tutor did WJEC, he will not have the experience of AQA for example. Whereas, teachers have usually taught more than one and are aware of the differences between syllabuses.

Exactly, an experienced teacher would walk away from this situation as they can't improve it. This student is going to use 3 hours a week to bang his head on a wall of "dunno" and "cold War, wazzat?"

AND possibly be held accountable for the boy failing. It's a nightmare scenario.

Your DS will get that at school. I think what the tutor is trying to tell you is that revision skills are not helpful when the knowledge is not there. You can't revise what you don't know.

I think people are being a bit blunt because you don't seem to graps this.

Grasp.

The biggest issue is that a parent as switched on as op about her child’s education does not know his mock grades in the subject he is struggling the most.