Would you have told this woman that half her bum was hanging out?

[CalonHapus]

DW and I were at a train station on Saturday which was full of people dressed up for Halloween. A bit ahead of us were two women whose costumes incorporated extremely short skirts. The woman on the left had got her skirt just long enough to cover everything but the woman on the right had the lower half of her bum showing.

DW wanted to say something to her, as she was worried she might not be aware and would appreciate being told. I said I didn't think this was a good idea, as she might have deliberately worn her skirt that short and therefore might react badly to someone bringing it up like it's a bad thing.

We ended up just carrying on to our train and not saying anything. Was I in the wrong to persuade DW not to get involved?

YABU - you should have said something to the woman

YANBU - you were right not to get involved

Sexy devil is it..? I know I'm my age when imagining painting your bare bum cheeks red and traipsing about a city centre in November brings on an involuntary 'what's the world coming to...?'😂

It was the DW that wanted to say something.

You did right OP to not say anything, of course they would have known how short the skirt was!

Hmm! The body paint observations was good sleuthing!

I agree: buttock flashing is a look atm.

I wouldn’t have said anything unless it was an obvious wardrobe malfunction. If the female wants to wear a short skirt that shows her bum cheeks then that’s upto her!

Maybe I'm just sensitive to touch but there is no way on earth I wouldn't be aware that my bum is hanging out. It would be DRAFTY! Its got to have been intentional.

Unintentional - then yes I do tell people.
Intentional - leave them to it, unless it was against dress code of the work place or court or something.

In this instance is does sound like intentionally short, buttock showing, skirts.

Well, one of them had painted her arse (and the rest of her) blue all over, and was wearing a black wig and an ultra-short wedding dress/basque thing that left the lower parts of said blue arse very visible indeed -- I think she may have been a Sexy Bride of Frankenstein, kind of? I kind of admired her chutzpah. I mean, I was wearing a jumper, a coat and biker boots, and had just come from a Buddhist meditation retreat.

There was also a duo who had fully committed to Shrek and Princess Fiona, but no semi-bare green arses were involved.

Well, I only really noticed because the Sexy Blue (Possible) Bride of Frankenstein was waiting for a traffic light to change to cross the street directly in front of me, and even though I had airpods in and was listening to music, I still heard the vocal excitement engendered in a bunch of Drunken Monks coming out of a pub nearby.

Brace yourself because surely it's next stop labia flashing ...

Something as discreetly as possible.

Or flapping?

I think it's a style choice. There were two separate women with short shorts on, both bottom half arse cheeks hanging out, when I was travelling to Greece a few weeks ago.

The one more noticeable (as was always closest to us) was very comfortable in the airports and walking up/down the plane aisle, so definitely a choice, as if you don't know your bare bum is on a plane seat... Both had partners with them, one had a child so alot of bending over to pick toddler up from the floor in the queue... I'd say they were in their 20s, it's a bit grim for people who are standing behind it but they seem happy so it's a case of just averting your eyes after the initial 'wtf' glance.

I saw a woman whose skirt had been pulled up by her rucksack showing half her knickers - she was grateful but I was in uniform at the time. I saw another whose bag had rucked her skirt up and told her (busy station) she hurumphed at me and didn't look pleased but hey!

I once jumped off the back of a bus (old London-type with an open platform) to alert a passer-by. A casually slung backpack had hoicked up her loose skirt to expose virtually all of her bottom. Fortunately (?) she was wearing extremely large comfortable briefs.

She was very grateful. In these situations I always think would I want to be told? And if so, would that be done best by a person like me? And if yes to both, then I'd do it as quickly and as discreetly as possible.

It was only 1.5 stops early, but I still felt virtuous for the rest of the day.

(Edited: Just saw post above. Beware the evil behaviour of rucksacks. They have no respect for a woman's dignity!)

same

I would definitely tell someone of a wardrobe malfunction, and have done on many occasions. I'm not sure I'd say anything to a young woman showing her arse though, I work with a lot of 20 somethings and they all wear very revealing clothing on nights out. I feel like a dowdy spinster aunt in comparison.

Thanks for the heads up. I'm practising saying "Nigel! avert your gaze!" with my mouth like a cats bum, in readiness.

If she was on her own, yes all 5’ 0 of me would have chanced telling her - but if as it seems she was with someone, then I wouldn’t. All about risk assessment - but then I do work in project management lol

The woman knew how short her skirt was. After telllinf her, what was she meant to do? She obviously doesn’t have a spare on her. She was heading out to begin her evening. She can’t grow more skirt.

Telling her would do nothing but appease your own moral outrage and piss off this lady who frankly, likely wanted her bum on show.

Minding your business was the correct call. And maybe eyes off other peoples bums.

I think I'll just stay home.

But then eyes off would be exceedingly disappointing for the woman who, as you say "wanted her bum on show."

I guess she could pull it down a little if it turned out she didn't want it showing quite so much.

DN's girlfriend wore a similar short skirt to a family lunch last year. Together with suspenders and stockings. It was clearly deliberately provocative. You could literally see most of her bum.

92 YO DM wasted no time in telling her we could see her knickers and she'd catch a chill so she'd better get changed before we sat down to eat.

MN is so heteronormative haha some comments are hilarious

Sounds a deliberate choice and would have been weird to say something, it’s different if their skirt is tucked into their pants when they’re coming out of the toilet type thing and they’re on their own and didn’t realise. Short skirts with a sexy type Halloween costume, they know how short they are especially if they’re with a friend.

ds sent me a group picture of his friends and their gf's Halloween costumes and they did not leave much to the imagination! So I expect she knew - if you've got it flaunt it!

I wouldn't have said anything unless it looked like something was obviously wrong - like half her skirt tucked into knickers with loo roll hanging out! (even then it might have been the costume!)