to wonder why people spend so long titting about with flowers and ribbons when they are making a lifetime commitment to another human being?

[muddypuddle]

I probably am, but I am sick to the back teeth of listening to all the blather in my office about canapes and favours and almonds and chair back floral arrangements and ribbons and lighting and nothing about the woman in questions' husband to be. Is it really mainly about the shopping?

Duh.

In the same situation with some friends of mine at the moment, they just had a huge row and didn't talk for 2 days over buttonholes

I honestly think they will get married and think 'ok what the feck do we do now'

Following previous thread about me not being a 'girly girl' (bands women don't like) we pretty much had a "oh, that looks nice, it'll do"
I was more bothered about the day itself & getting married than what we looked like, who ate what and who sat where.
(FIL tried to stick his nose in with who to invite and was firmly told "when you're paying for it, you get a say. Otherwise, keep your nose out")

I'm with you muddypuddle. What a complete waste of time and money.

They should get married in their lunch break and go home for egg and chips and Corrie .

chair back floral arrangements

And what are favours all about?

They are also throwing a party to which all their friends and family are invited.

Don't we all go to a bit of time and trouble organising a large party ?

I think people are all different - some people have dreamt about their wedding day all their lives. Personally, I didn't bother with any of it but I am quite happy if others want to.

Party bags for grown ups.

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Oh I love it- the more the merrier. I wish I knew a couple of Bridezillas I would actively encourage them. I love a good party. MORE MORE titting around with fulffy things.

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YP, pass her on to me!!!

I think a balance needs to be acheived. Obviously you want the day to be special (whatever that may mean to you as an individual) and make a comitment to each other. The trouble is you are much more likely to chat about the arrangements with others than start gushing about your undying love/commitment to you husband to be!

funny no one ever talks to me about these things. i must have a 'don't waste my time with your vacant consumerist musings' face.

grown women starving themselves over one day

a friend of mine went from a size 12 to a size 8 just for her wedding. i remember at the reception she said to me the meal would be the first proper food shed eaten for 3 months! her dh was moaning she had lost her tits. "spaniels ears" he clled them she didnt care cos she fitted in to the dress of her dreams

get your priorities right i say

yes! she is a wife now she has to keep her dh happy, no?

there was a very long conversation about how much the flowers pull the meaning of the whole day together for her.

we have had infinate procrastination on the hand beading of the bodice which took place in India - the dress was flown out specially and it wasn't good enough when it came back so it went all the way back to India for another bash.

my cousin got married and her dad paid for a £5,000 dress. they got divorced 2 years later. he is still paying for the dress

YANBU. My ex SIL was like this . they spent a shed load of money and time and effort on what was a beautiful marriage. She looked wonderful. Within 4 months she has moved out of the house and they were formally sparated, with divorse proceedings underway by six months.

Had she spent a fraction of the time thinking about her marriage rather than her wedding this this could well have been avoided