AIBU to think this is a bit rude/ cheeky?

[Iloveleaveinconditioner]

I’m quite a ‘perfume’ person and have a collection (about 15 bottles at the moment) in a glass cabinet in one of our guests rooms. Some of them are very expensive and have been Christmas/ birthday presents.

We’ve just had guests down for 4 days for half term. For reference, it’s an old work colleague of my husband’s who he became really good friends with, his wife and their 2 DC. I’ve met this friend and his wife about 5-6 times over the years and they are absolutely lovely, we really get on.

Anyway, all week the wife smelt lovely, I kept smelling all these lovely, familiar smells. You can probably see where this is going!

Yesterday when they were leaving, I gave her a hug goodbye and again, she smelt lovely (but familiar) I said ‘god you smell lovely’ and she said ‘Thanks, it’s one of yours, I’ve been using different ones of yours all week, been getting my money’s worth’ and laughed. I was a bit taken aback but laughed too.

I’m not sure how I feel about it to be honest. On one hand I almost don’t mind, it’s hardly the end of the world, but on the other I think I’d never dream of doing that, especially without asking and even then, I’d only ask if I’d forgotten my perfume and for some reason smelt awful, or they had one that I really wanted to try before I purchased.

Is it a bit rude or am I being overly precious?

Its very cheeky. Especially the "getting her moneys worth" you ask before you take other peoples things

You and I are clearly on the same page. What a damn cheek! And to talk about money as if you’ve charged them for the room! They’d be off my Christmas card list now.

Clearly you have to invoice her for them 😂 - how much are they OP? Are we talking Amouage here or Chanel? And you speak as if she used half a bottle…. Did she?

Maybe being a bit precious... next time move them or move your faves.
Take it as a compliment anyway at least you know you smell nice .

That's what I think.

I'd have done the same as your friend. Just as I'd help myself to a tin of biscuits by the bed, drink the bottle of water, read the books on the shelves, use the bathrobe hanging behind the door. Things left in the guest room are for the guest. I'm not sure why your perfume is there if it's for your use only.

You left it where guests have access to it? I'd probably have a squirt too tbh. Don't be precious! 😅

I used to clean for a very wealthy woman (think on the richest people in Kent list).
In an unused guest bathroom I found a vintage bottle of ysatis. I was so desperate to try it but too frightened (I'm a bit obsessed with perfume). I Also didn't want to ask because she might not have understood the significance of an 80s bottle of perfume I'd been after for ages. So I put the tiniest bit on my arm. She probably wouldn't have noticed if I'd stolen it but working as a cleaner trust is everything, and I'm not theif

Guests should not help themselves to the light fittings and duvet set or take away books or bathrobes without asking, but disposables like tissues, water, soap and yes perfume left in the guest room are for the use of the guest unless otherwise specified.

Why on earth are they in the guest room if guests can use them? Keep them in your own room or bathroom.

But it’s weird to have your perfumes in the guest room?

I have actually stayed at a friends’ houses where the guest rooms had perfumes/aftershave out for guests to use. It is a thing.

That said if I saw that the room was used as storage for your and DH’s stuff I would infer the perfumes were yours.

I suspect she knew and was tempted, the “money’s worth” comment was particularly gauche.

I use all th toiletries in a bathroom when im staying with friends and I’d expect guests to use my stuff.

a friend once used half a pot of nice face cream as she couldn’t find any regulqr
moisturiser for her arms/legs… I waant thrilled but it was there in the bathroom!

It depends. If she was sleeping in a room that clearly belonged to someone else and she was 'borrowing' someone's space, then she absolutely should not have touched the perfumes.

If she was staying in a guest room, that is NOT someone's bedroom, with toiletries left there, I can see why she would assume they were for guests. Perfume, soap, bath oil, whatever.

My MiL always has baskets of toiletries for guests to use, including fragrances.

I think it was rude of her to use them, not even just one. Whether or not they are in a guest room is irrelevant. The Op should be allowed to display her perfumes in her own house, wherever she wants. Cheeky bugger.

It doesn't seem a question of reasonableness or no. I think I'd have thought they were for general use too; were I you, I would just take it as a lesson learned and move them somewhere else. Her comment though, was a bit rude, esp. as it indicated she knows perfumes are expensive and that her use of them was a big cost to you.

Well, of course. But the point is whether she was rude to use them, which she wouldn't be if she had genuinely assumed they were for use by guests.

The OP had not intended for her to use them, so the guest was mistaken rather than rude, imo.

How extraordinarily rude and entitled! Her comment about 'getting her money's worth' says it all really. I'd make very sure everything is locked away and out of sight if she ever stays again.

Very rude. And if she comes again clear the shelves and she will realise you weren't happy, you won't need to say a word.

Yep

I think that's really cheeky! But I would have reacted in the same way as you did, out of surprise!
She should have asked

I think she assumed you didn’t mind as they were in her bedroom. She probably thought you are a top class hostess - next level from some nice handwash

I would find it odd too OP, but I think storing the perfumes in the guest room blurred the lines a bit.

Sorry but no.

This whole “well they were in the guest room, so I can see why she’s use them” argument is bollocks.

I would NEVER use anything in someone else’s home without their permission, guest room or not. And nobody else with manners would either.

I'd say your guest using them ALL for the sake of it and the comment about getting her money's worth was beyond cringe. I would see no issue personally with a guest using a little of my scent in a normal way, though.
If you like having them on display, it'd probably better to keep them in a room not open to guests.