No not have a party or a holiday abroad for my 50th birthday

[CoffeeCakeCreamy]

I'm 50 in November. I've planned a family dinner in a restaurant a few days beforehand and another meal in a really nice restaurant with my siblings on the day itself, then later in the month with friends. Will buy myself something nice. I'm happy with this, but some people seem to think I should be doing more - a party, big holiday or something.

AIBU to be happy to celebrate like this?

I was 50 during Covid, so couldn't do anything even if I wanted to. A friend of mine was 50 in September and has spent a month celebrating, with days out, holidays and parties. Overkill if you ask me, but everyone wants to do something different to celebrate. Don't ever bow to peer pressure, your Birthday, you do what you want to do

Celebrate however you like , I don’t really do birthdays and spent my 50th in hospital after collapsing during a venesection . What you have suggested sounds ideal to me .

I've never really enjoyed big birthday celebrations, and basically avoid them. My family know the score and there are no surprises! This November it’s our 40 th wedding anniversary. We’ve hired a cottage in the Peak District for us and our two children and girlfriends . As having them was also the reason we got married, we thought it a loving thing to do all round and we’re all looking forward to it.

Do what you like. I doubt anyone will care less either way.

I think big birthday celebrations for adults are ridiculous but others don’t. Choose whatever suits you best.

Thankfully DH and our extended family also feel the same so we never have a problem with adult birthdays.

Can you explain why you think big birthday celebrations for adults are ridiculous (and what constitutes big - a party? A holiday? Dinner out?)? Genuinely. I wouldn’t have a party myself as I’m not a big fan, but I genuinely don’t understand this idea that it’s ridiculous for adults to celebrate.

I freaking LOVE a big birthday and have been thinking about my 50th for about 3 years as I figured out what would make me happiest AND work for my friends/family.

Having said that:

YANBU at all.

The ONLY thing that is important on a big birthday is that you do what YOU want to do. If that's lie in a dark room with whale chants for 8 hours, or party till dawn for 3 straight weeks makes absolutely no difference.

And I will ALWAYS respect whatever the birthday person prefers.

Absolutely agree @JadziaD