The ‘mental load’

[Cachall]

Does anyone else cringe when they read this term on here?

No.

Maybe people who cause it might cringe.

No. Why does it make you cringe?

No because it's a real thing!

Yep. It just sounds like an over dramatisation of everyday tasks to me.

I don't

This!

Yes, only slightly less cringey than "life admin".

Yes

It depends what people are counting as “mental load”. Organising weekly activities and ferrying multiple kids around to them or sorting out care for ageing relatives, sure. Sorting out the house insurance renewal or sending birthday cards, don’t be daft, that stuff takes five minutes once a year.
All too often people include ridiculous things in their “mental load” lists to make it look like they’re doing more than they are in an attempt to justify really not pulling their weight.

Yes its very dramatic and they are usually complaining about things that can be booked/organised months in advance.

Fucking love seeing it, particularly where the op's jobs are broken down in to every component and the husbands are given an umbrella term like diy or gardening

My jobs:
Load the dishwasher
Turn on the dishwasher
Empty the plates
Put away the cutlery
Put away the glassware
Renew passports

His jobs:
Cook dinner
Go to work

That reminds me of a recent thread when a poster was complaining about all the "steps" involved in sending postcards when on holiday 😂.

Just another meaningless buzz word/sentence 🤷‍♀️

I cringe when I see it

No.
I congratulate everyone who finds it so easy due to either circumstances, personality, upbringing, intelligence, education, but I think it's really fucking snotty and unaware to look down on others who struggle. You wouldn't look down at someone trying to read, or learn a new sport, or learn a new skill at work, so im not sure why people get so dismissive over people who struggle to multitask and juggle to-do lists in their head and havnt found an organisation mechanism that works for them yet, or is dealing with additional stresses that make it hard (and life is complex and we all deal with things differently)

No. It’s an accurate description of being the one who has to think about everything when you’re meant be in a partnership.

Perfectly capable adults painting themselves as the victims of mundane tasks? Yeah, it's mostly ridiculous.

I think it is unhelpful as a term because one person's "mental load" is being a solo parent-carer to multiple disabled children, with health issues of their own, working part-time and trying to make every penny stretch to keep a roof over their heads (meaning tasks like shopping around for car insurance actually really matter), and another's is being a SAHM to one non-disabled teenager attending mainstream school 40 hours a week, financially secure and finding organising a holiday stressful.

Neither is wrong to not enjoy the admin - and in fact I do often think some of the feelings underlying "unmanageable mental load" can be fairly universal eg feeling unsupported and undervalued - but as with other useful terms or analogies, sadly it becomes diluted the more mainstream usage becomes.

No.
Lone working parent to child with SEN.

Yep

No. It’s a very useful term. I am one of those very organised people and I have through experience honed it all to a fine art and am very effective, but it still sometimes gets to me that there’s always an accumulation of small tasks waiting for me. Sure, each one might only take minutes, but the relentlessness of it can get overwhelming.

No.

Clearly you've never had an issue with too much to do and think about then. Lucky you. You want a medal, or something? Or is just looking down on women who struggle with it your bag?

Yes
Who told anyone life is not stressful
It is