Things you wouldn't admit in real life part 2

[TwinklyFawn]

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you will spend time with people you dislike rather than be alone?

its a legal change.

Then place stuff that they changed their minds to where they picked it up. Not randomly. I doubt anyone who worked/worked in supermarkets has dumped ice cream in the baked beans, fresh milk in the freezers etc

This. You’ve described it well and that’s what I’ve noticed with only children/adults. They are are lovely, but they are ‘selfish’ in that they expect their needs to be met first it’s “Let’s do this, let’s do that, I want to go there”.

My ex was an only child and I had to sometimes point out that’s it’s not just about what he wants. He usually took it well and responded appropriately but it didn’t come naturally to always consider he’s not the most important.

It’s the same with the kids I know (DC’s friends) lovely girls but it’s usually my DD has to do what they want and I assume it’s because they’ve always had it their way without having to share resources/affection etc…

Thank you - this is actually encouraging. I do love him, dearly.

That 'weddings' are bullshit and a completely pointless stressful expensive rip-off and a waste of time. I wholeheartedly believe in marriage though.

Id get married again, but I wouldn't have a wedding. Id just rock up at the registry office with no fuss and no others but me and him and drag some strangers in.

My lovely cousin is getting married again to the same man she divorced 6 years ago. The prices for a very simple local wedding in a run down pub are eyewatering, and she has all the dramas of who to invite, whose going to get upset, who doesn't get along. I don't understand why she or anyone would put themselves through the hell of it - and shes doing it twice!

Weirdly I am a romantic though. Just not about weddings.

People have made a lot of plans around it.

Deposits have been paid.

There's not a good reason not to get married.

I have been married twice before and am quite embarrassed to do it again. But my lovely, romantic fiancé has never been married and I don't feel it's fair to deprived him of this experience.

Did you go through with it?

Yes I am as needy af.

actually it’s not needy, more I don’t enjoy my own company, overthink etc.

we have evolved into different people to be honest.

I hate weddings. Don't like wearing very smart clothes, can't wear any heels. Then they are so bloody boring. The time between the speeches and the evening stuff.

Been invited to weddings and made excuses on why I can't go. Use things like unable to book 2-3 days off, got something on, on holiday. Not because I refuse to wear wedding attire.

I believe most weddings now are just showing off for SM purposes.

My parents only invited immediate family to their wedding then about 2 months after, had a party with their friends. DM's best friend was heavily pregnant at the time of the wedding that was why they did the party then.

Then there are the hen/stag dos. They used to be a meal out followed by a club. Now most are hen and stag long weekends away and usually abroad. I seen these on FB as my friends been on them and one of them had 25 of them. How do they able to get 25 people who work for different employers to get the same off work? Plus there must be a few that can't afford the £1800 (that was the average price my friends paid for flights. hotel, meals/drinks, clothes) for a 3-5 nights.

I hear you. I hate attending them too. They are so expensive and boring for guests. And of course horrifically expensive for the couple. I just don't get it at all. I wonder if a lot of it is just expectation and social media?

It will be a cold day in hell before I had a wedding.

I'm not normally one for victim blaming but I do think if you're a phone zombie who gets their phone nicked because you have the situational awareness of a bucket of logs then it's your own damn fault.

I would also make walking about on your phone not paying any attention to your surroundings a fineable offence and punishable by having your phone crushed but that's probably unrealistic....!

With £1800 for the cost of being part of a hen or stag do abroad, then probably half that again for outfit(s), taxis, hotel stay, travel and a gift.

I am glad someone has admitted that weddings are boring.

After another thread on S and B, I really need to get this off my chest....

I think that wide leg trousers are the most unflattering nonsense that we have ever been marketed.
They look dreadful on most people, add at least 2 dress sizes to their general look.
Unless a v cropped/tight top, you just look like a sack of potatoes.
Any coat looks dreadful unless it's cropped.

Ooh yes - v clever in magazines etc - a long wool coat but it's held back by their arms so that it's obvious the person underneath is thin. In real life, I don't hold my coat open to show I've got a flat tummy. So long baggy coat over massive trouser legs - make anyone look like a sack of potatoes. Unless size 6 and very tall with heels.
See also tops in general - all the models have their hands on hips or something to move the top to show they are thin underneath because the clothes would just make them look huge.

I have been trying them on for months. I have sent 2 virtually unworn pairs to charity. I have given up.
I am 5' 5" and 8.5 stone and still look chunky in them.

And they soak up water from the pavement.

I work hard to keep a nice shape. I'm not wearing this ugly nonsense.

Oh it can be done. Not all of us that have retired swan about all day, some of us volunteer, some of us look after or parents and Grandchildren, and some like me have food to put on the table that i have grown, seafood to fish for and a field of animals that need looking after. So i am far from lazy.

"I wonder if a lot of it is just expectation and social media?"

Almost entirely.

I really don't get barrel leg trousers. They just look fugly to me.

I think a lot of people nowadays think of a wedding as a party and aren't really thinking about the implications of being married.

Snap, surely you'd just say it's not for me/I think it's rubbish/I judge you massively for enjoying it - why can't you say that in real life?

@amibeingaknob

💐💐

what is even more annoying is when they are pitched at us larger ladies. One of my best bits is my legs. In barrel trousers, i look like the south end of an elephant travelling north. They will prise my skinny jeans and long tops from my cold dead hands

I like wide leg jeans and barrel trousers, but I agree that they're less versatile than my good old mom jeans or utility trousers, that go with trainers, birkenstoks, chelsea boots, loafers and any sort of top + jacket / coat.
And I'm a size 6. But wide leg jeans and my oversized trench make me look like I'm lost in my clothes, so I avoid that combo.

I agree - weddings are getting too expensive and logistically complicated for guests these days.
I believe we need to rethink the format of "formal country house wedding in the middle of nowhere that is either child free or takes place on a weekday". It's a huge lift for a lot of the guests and in this day and age when you have two working parents and the whole cost of living crisis situation, there are often sacrifices to be made in terms of money and time away from family in order to attend such a wedding.
I could never say this out loud as it sounds like sour grapes! But I think it's madness and i don't think it was even "traditional" in the UK until the 90s or so unless you were literally landed gentry or royal or absolutely loaded.

These comments are making me feel better about my London pub wedding plans!

@amibeingaknob thanks for sharing. I for one don't judge you, in fact I offer a hand hold. I can't imagine what you must have really gone through if there's a lot more to it. What you've described is horrific enough. As long as you can say to yourself that you really tried your best, that's all that you can do. And the fact that you still tell her you love her after all she's done shows the sort of mother you are. I wish I could give you a hug. My parents are the type to disown for a lot less. You tried your hardest but sometimes in life you are allowed to be a bit "selfish", especially when you did all that you could. A big hug from me x

I had first orgasm in my life with my child's ex teacher.