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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unopened sanitary towel

303 replies

Numberblocks10 · 10/10/2025 08:13

Currently got my period. When I got home from work yesterday I dropped my bag by mistake and everything fell out. I put everything back (or so I thought) but then around half an hour later 9yo DS found one of my sanitary towels on the floor, picked it up and asked what it was. Just to clarify, it was unused (obviously) and still in the packet. I must have missed it when I was picking up things from my bag.

DH then shouted at DS to put it down (literally shouted at him) and then shouted at me asking why it was there. I explained to him what happened and he said it’s weird to be leaving things like that lying around.

I asked him to explain why it was “weird” but he couldn’t answer me.

AIBU to feel hurt by this? I don’t understand his reaction.

OP posts:
Londonrach1 · 10/10/2025 08:15

Dh has a strange opinion of them. I know one mum who has four boys who made sure she left her pads out saying her boys may have girlfriends and wives at some point and need to just accept them as they are similar to a toilet roll.

thisishowloween · 10/10/2025 08:16

Your DH needs to get a grip.

CrostaDiPizza · 10/10/2025 08:17

They are as embarrassing as tooth floss. Your husband is an idiot.

Coffeeishot · 10/10/2025 08:19

Your Dh is weird about periods my god a grown man, you need to tell your son ASAP about periods and sanitary products so he doesn't turn into your husband , he is 9 fgs.

Vinvertebrate · 10/10/2025 08:19

Not as weird as being married to a man who is freaked out by a basic healthcare product used by c. 50% of the population.

Knobhead. (DH not OP).

HereForTheFreeLunch · 10/10/2025 08:21

Does your DH think he will catch some feminity from them?

TheBlueHotel · 10/10/2025 08:23

What a weird and misogynistic man you're married to

maudelovesharold · 10/10/2025 08:25

I hope you counteracted your dh’s extreme reaction by explaining calmly and in a matter-of-fact way to your ds what it was and that some men, including his father, have a strange reaction to discussing what half the population have to deal with every month. Otherwise he’s going to grow up thinking it’s an embarrassing taboo subject, and, more importantly, that he did something wrong by asking what it was.

AutumnWreath · 10/10/2025 08:25

I think at 9 he should have already been around sanitary products for years . Periods are not women's dirty little secret , they are as normal as going to the loo .
Did you casually say it was for your period , or did your husband hush hush that up as well ? Strange man .

NerrSnerr · 10/10/2025 08:25

That is strange. Are your sanitary towels hidden away? It’s surprising that if you use them your son hasn’t seen them before.

Guavafish1 · 10/10/2025 08:25

What’s wrong with your husband? Tell him to grow up!

Why shout?

Original poster
Numberblocks10 · 10/10/2025 08:30

DS knows about periods but the sanitary towels are usually in the bathroom cupboard. Not to hide them, it’s just where I put them

OP posts:
whatusernameshouldiuse · 10/10/2025 08:34

How weird! That is not the reaction any man should give. He has just taught his child that this item is not nice/dirty/not to be touched. I think my partner would have said ‘ooh mummy must have dropped it, pop it on the side or in the bathroom. He would have just said its for when she has her period. Because periods are not dirty, weird or embarrassing they are a fact of life.

I am sorry your husband shouted, but more so I am sorry your husband is ‘weirded’ out by a sanitary towel.

Just a question to consider, if you came on and you had no towels in the house, would he go to the shop and buy you some? This is something all men should be able to do. My dad and my partner who have all daughters will go and buy them and ask what flow to get. I remember my dad phoning me once to say ‘they only have liliets in heavy, are you ok not having the applicator or would you like me to go to tesco’
thats the kind of man you want to bring up. I think you need to do some sort of damage control (seems extreme expression but could not think of the word) to ensure your little boy is not the type of man to cringe at the word period or tampon.

Sagaciously · 10/10/2025 08:34

Aged 9, why has he not seen period products until now? I’ve always made a point of leaning tampon boxes out in the bathroom.

Your husband sounds incredibly old fashioned.

Surroundedbyfools · 10/10/2025 08:35

Men who are weird about periods/sanitary products are so immature and strange. Tell ur 9 year old son about periods etc so he doesn’t turn out like ur husband

PurpleChrayn · 10/10/2025 08:36

Bizarre reaction.

Coffeeishot · 10/10/2025 08:39

Numberblocks10 · 10/10/2025 08:30

DS knows about periods but the sanitary towels are usually in the bathroom cupboard. Not to hide them, it’s just where I put them

Well he must know women use "something" once a month where does he think the blood goes? Periods aren't pleasant but they are not dirty your husband was acting like the pad was taboo and dirty. And the whole scenario was over the top.

FirstCuppa · 10/10/2025 08:40

Wow, how did you have kids and he's treating a sanitary towel like it might give the kids rabies? Men really have no idea about our bodily functions do they?
I'd be hiding them all over the house and filming him like those cat vs cucumber shorts.

MoonDanceDiner · 10/10/2025 08:41

Your husband is very immature. Does he feel this way about toilet paper too or only issues connected to female anatomy?

Letsnotargue · 10/10/2025 08:42

My ex used to be embarrassed buying toilet roll, to the point where he’d make me buy it. I didn’t notice at first but then realised it was very weird. Oddly he didn’t really have an issue with period products (although he would not have bought them).

Rumors1 · 10/10/2025 08:43

OP you need to have a proper discussion with him about this. It is an extreme reaction and shows exactly how he feels about periods.
I have two teenage boys and a teenage girl and periods are discussed. Pads and tampons are in all the bathrooms. My DH does the shopping and will discuss with DD what she needs and will remind her to check if she is running low on supplies.
DH has made a hot water bottle for her if she has cramps.
No embarrassment here, its a natural bodily function.

BunnyLake · 10/10/2025 08:49

What an odd and really quite offensive response from your dh, has he timeslipped from the Victorian times?

I had a hysterectomy when my kids (boys) were young so there’s never been any products in our house but had there been I wouldn't have hidden them away like a dirty secret. Your dh needs a good talking to.

anyix · 10/10/2025 08:51

I’d be offended by this too. There was no reason for him to shout at your son or you. It gives off the impression that he thinks periods are indecent and disgusting when it’s a completely normal thing.

BunnyLake · 10/10/2025 08:52

Rumors1 · 10/10/2025 08:43

OP you need to have a proper discussion with him about this. It is an extreme reaction and shows exactly how he feels about periods.
I have two teenage boys and a teenage girl and periods are discussed. Pads and tampons are in all the bathrooms. My DH does the shopping and will discuss with DD what she needs and will remind her to check if she is running low on supplies.
DH has made a hot water bottle for her if she has cramps.
No embarrassment here, its a natural bodily function.

Even my dad would buy towels for my mum in the shopping and that was back in the 70s, this man is being ridiculous in 2025.

Megifer · 10/10/2025 08:53

This has reminded me of the time when my DS at about 6 saw an advert for tampons and was asking q's about them, so we set up an experiment with mine seeing how absorbant they were with different thickness of liquids 🤣 they are rubbish with custard btw.

DP walked in and just 🙄 at us and carried on making his brew.

I have them in our first aid box just in case for deep cuts.

Your DH is so very strange and id be having words with him.

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