DP got me the wrong present.

[PresentBlunder]

I really wanted the brand new Dyson air wrap for my birthday, it’s almost £600 - I know, ridiculous.

I’ve been squirrelling money away for a couple of months. DP asked me what I’d like for my birthday and I said the air wrap, but it’s a lot of money, so perhaps a contribution towards it. He said he’d buy it for me as it’s a big birthday and he’s getting his bonus from work soon.

My DP is very good at shopping around, getting a discount, we often buy second hand from Facebook and eBay. However, I explained to him that because it’s brand new out (1 month), he likely won’t find it as a bargain anywhere and he’s best off buying it direct from Dyson with our daughters student discount. He agreed and I sent the link.

Come today, I’ve opened my present from him and it’s the Dyson air wrap from quite a few years ago. A much older model without the latest tech or attachments. He was ridiculously pleased with himself and told me he’d got it for much cheaper than the advertised price.

Would you just be honest with him? I don’t want to crush him, he was grinning like a Cheshire Cat, but it’s not what I wanted and I’d rather return it and put the money towards the one I actually wanted. I also don’t want to see ungrateful as it was a lovely gesture.

Or I could just return it and buy the one I want and he’ll likely never know?

I asked him why he didn’t just buy it from the link and he said because he always manages to get deals on things and he didn’t realise there would be such a difference between models. He saw air wrap and assumed what he’d bought was correct.

That's even worse than a genuine mistake. He actively ignored your explanation that it needed to be the exact model you linked. And then sulked. He's really not coming out of this well. A late night apology is too little too late. Sounds like he wasn't even adult enough to ensure he didn't let this overshadow your birthday.

Why should she tell him she loves the gift?

She doesn't. And he didn't care whether she would. He went to considerable effort to do the thing that made himself happy, rather than the thing she'd said would make her happy.

Ok I stand corrected, tell him he’s not listened to a word that you’ve said, you told him that he wouldn’t get a discount so why on earth didn’t he check the details of what he actually ordered.

My Dyson hairdryer halved the drying time in half, if it ever packs up I would buy another one. Hairdressers always say my hair clings into water and that’s why it takes so long to dry. A couple of times I’ve been asked to only make midweek appointments or they’ll book me for an extra half an hour as it takes so long to dry.

I hope you have great fun experimenting when it arrives.

Tell him, and also tell the miserable get that in future he has to follow orders. I also live with a 'clever' (read as tight) partner and see this regularly.

Pretty much everything on MN is a first world problem. I didn't see in the terms and conditions that only third world problems are allowed.

They all seem to be the latest ones - I presume there are different versions. £600 seems a lot to spend on a hair curler cum straightener, that's all. I have always found if you want a specific thing you need to buy it yourself.

That explained, he appears to be an idiot.

Not really, a specific link normally does the trick.
You wouldn’t buy someone an old model second hand iPhone if they really wanted the newer one.

I'm so happy I don't live in a "big presents" world. The stress and/or letdowns would be too much for me.

Mind you, the only hairdryers we have bought are from Argos for £30, so I don't have the right perspective.

She should have bought it herself - I always find this is best. DH's frequently have cloth ears. OP's example also appears to be into bargain hunting, which is never a good idea if looking for a specific present for someone else!

I old not keep the one I didn’t like and I’d tell dh. I prefer buying my own stuff, I get what I want, money is irrelevant as it’s shared

cloth ears? She sent him a link ffs.

What a low bar you have if you think OP should have bought it herself to avoid this.

He’s annoyed because he thought he knew best and would ignore you and do his own thing even after you told him it’s only been out for a month and also the best way to purchase it. Effectively, the Dyson has now cost £900.

If I were buying someone a gift like this, even if they didn’t tell me it was newly-released, I’d always check if there’s a later model for this reason. Even twenty seconds on Dyson’s home page shows there are three models but he’s done nothing other than look to find what’s cheapest. No thought about the history (yours was years old) or reliability of it (no warranty), just what’s cheap. I’m surprised he thought that a used-once £600 item would really be going for £300 and he should’ve checked he was buying the right thing before handing over that kind of cash.

He knew it wasn't the right one as op said he told her he didn't think there would be much difference in the different models.

Has he bought you a birthday present yet though?

I’d say, thank you for the present, very kind of you. However it’s not exactly the one I wanted so would you mind if I sold it and used the money to buy the one that I needed? See how he reacts. He may not understand about hairdryers or he may just be cheap.

So if you sent your DH a link for a £30 new hairdryer youd be happy with an old one he got from a carboot for £3? Thats the equivalent.

The price is a red herring here.

The fact is, she was buying herself a specific item she wanted. He OFFERED to get it for her for her birthday, she even sent him the link and explained it was new so unlikely to get a discount and he completely ignored everything she said and proceeded to buy her something used and wrong.

If he felt 600 was too much he shouldn't have offered.

It wasn't kind. He thought about his own wants and feelings, not the OP's.

Fair comment!

since this was very much deliberate, why should she have the hassle of selling it?

Ha! No. Not her job to sell it.

She was going to get it herself anyway, so she buys the £600 one now. He has this overpriced secondhand hairdryer on his hands to do what he wants with, and still owes her a gift.

She does not have to pussyfoot around with: "Do you mind...?".. and "It's not exactly the one I wanted...".

Makes me wonder if the DH did actually pay £300 for it not £150 like you’ve seen them going for on FB.

On another note, if you want a Dyson thing, I’ve found the best place to get them is QVC. They often have a discount and you can pay in 3 or 4 interest free instalments so not quite as horrifying to buy IMHO.

This.

@PresentBlunder What is he going to get you for your birthday now? Don't let him weasel out of that.

Yep. I was being non confrontational!