Was I unreasonable to take my daughters with me to get my nails done?

[OrlaMcCool]

I changed my name for this because I’ve told other people about it.
I was planning on getting my nails done for a special occasion today and I went to a hotel spa I’d been given a voucher for.

I have taken my daughters (5 and 9) with me to a walk in nail bar before and they sit with snacks and their iPad.
No one has ever complained and some customers and the technicians seem to have enjoyed having them there and chatting about colours and designs. If it’s too busy for them to sit next to me then they sit in the waiting area.

The only suitable appointment was today at 4pm so after school. I had no choice so took my girls with me planning to do the same and let them sit and wait with their iPad.
When I arrived the woman on reception said in a really shitty tone of voice that kids weren’t allowed inside not even to wait quietly.
I said they would be really good but she said absolutely not because there were people in rooms having treatments and they wanted to keep a relaxing atmosphere.

I do understand this and didn’t realise that they did nails by the treatment rooms, I asked if there was anywhere else they could sit and I was practically begging.
Another woman came over and said she was the owner and said I needed to make another appointment. I explained I didn’t have a chance and that my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off, I was nearly in tears because I was embarrassed and frustrated.

The owner said that no children were allowed in the spa under any circumstances and was hostile and standing like a bouncer at the door. I left because I didn’t want to make a fuss but I was holding back tears and thought the way she spoke to me was rude and unfair.

I know it wasn’t ideal and I probably didn’t think it through properly because I’m used to taking my girls with me to the usual place I go to.
I think they could have been a bit kinder and let them sit in reception but I suppose they didn’t know that they will actually sit and behave nicely.
I’m not asking if I was unreasonable to take them, I want to know if I’m unreasonable for expecting the staff to have been less aggressive and for speaking to me that way in front of my children and making them sound like a nuisance.

I was going to complain to the hotel that rents the space to the spa but my sister said I was being ridiculous and told me to post for opinions on here.

@shuggles

why have you assumed that the nail technical tech would be male?

They probably get it a lot so need to be abrupt.

"Pile-on" is correctly hyphenated when used as a compound noun or adjective.

But you were using it as a verb. No hyphen is required.

Hi all,

Please stop derailing the thread with grammar nonsense. Thanks. bangs gavel

You can hyphenate as a compound adjective when "pile-on" is used to describe a noun and comes before it in the sentence.

"The sudden media pile-on was overwhelming". Or, "She experienced the intense pile-on effect".

Yes, children listening to their nonsense on devices in public at any volume at all is annoying af, and the reason people don't say anything is they know that parents often have absolute shit fit melt downs and start carrying on like entitled idiots the minute anybody tries to intervene. I am unsurprised you never considered noise pollution for the adults around you to be a problem.

Most adult people do not want to chat to your kids - full stop. Once you accept that, you will find the world a simpler place.

You don't have to apologise to the people there, so long as you stop taking your kids to adult establishments and expecting them to act as unofficial child care, all good.

I am glad you have taken these comments on board.

Oh, dear God. You weren’t using “pile on” as a noun or an adjective. You were using it as a verb. No hyphen is required in that situation.

ETA: I just noticed the message from MNHQ. Sorry, I won’t derail the thread further with discussions about grammar!

If it makes you feel better OP, once he got grommets my toddler son, became extremely chatty and was constantly asking questions. My husband taking him to the dentist and sitting in the waiting room was enjoying a brief moment of respite from the constant prattle. Then my husband suddenly realised our son had buttonholed a former Prime Minister, who was also in the waiting room (we're not in the UK) and who was also famous for not suffering idiots readily. The former Prime Minister was utterly charming according to my husband but he was no doubt aiming for votes.

:/ Clearly all of the people who voted that you were being unreasonable know much more about spas than I do. I'd have thought that if there was a strict no children policy they ought to have made it clear when you booked, no?

PS for discreet listening, Legami make really good quality earbuds in cute animal cases - not cheap, but good value for money and decent sound quality.

I go to a spa once a month to unwind not to see kids and iPads. Also is getting your nails done so important. Really? If it is you need to get a babysitter or not make your nails a priority. Tell you the truth you need to decide on priorities and that includes your kids when you "need desperately" to get your nails done. Harsh but your problem sort it

You came here asking for opinions and people have given you what you asked for: their opinions.

You then proceed to argue and justify and try to persuade people that their opinions, that you asked for, were incorrect/unreasonable.

You make things worse and worse. Just like you did when the nail staff told you “No”.

What are you like??

Your poor long-suffering husband.

I’m sorry - they sound like they were polite and you pushed.

A 5yo is far too young to expect a stranger to watch. The 9yo possibly but the 5yo is an absolute no.

I’m sure your daughters do enjoy it, but it’s not about your children. I can guarantee the vast majority of the other clients do not want them there. Yes they are polite but if given a choice, would say no.

stop being so entitled. Nail appointments are not essential so if you can’t go without your children, you can’t go.

You are putting yourself in a chair having treatments, that you can’t walk away from to check on your kids, so you are basically leaving them to their own devices.
in my nail salon they don’t allow kids because of the toxic smells, never mind the fact kids although they can behave can not at times.
other people are going for a pamper and get away from their kids so sorry leave them at home with someone

It will probably have been to do with their insurance.

I’ve never been to a spa that welcomes children in the treatment room. I mean part the reason we go there is to escape them.

“I explained… my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off.”
Oh you’re one of those parents! 🙄
Do you know how antisocial and unreasonable it is to subject anyone anywhere to the sound of your kids’ iPads. Try harder! Insist on headphones at all times when in public.

YABVU - I can’t believe you thought a hotel spa would allow kids in 😳 As for asking if they can sit in the hotel reception, the hotel staff aren’t free babysitters! And you can’t guarantee your kids would behave appropriately. Most of us would like to think our kids would behave but kids often squabble about silly things and spa nail appointments can take a fair while as the focus is on pampering.

Exactly!

Also OP said they (DC) enjoy getting involved and sometimes chatting to other customers and staff. If I can see that someone isn’t keen on chatting then I redirect them back to the iPad.

But this is where your lack of self awareness and clear entitlement is showing. You say that if you see that person/people who aren’t ’keen on chatting’, you direct your DC away - but that paying customers peace has already been disrupted at that point!

The spa is a place for adult relaxation - not a source of entertainment for DC - regardless of how much ‘they enjoy it’.

Your entitlement is off the scale. Watching the iPad with sound on in public? Repeatedly talking children to nail salons which are full of toxic fumes? Being so desperate for your nails to be painted (or have plastic glued onto them) that you ‘practically begged’ and were ‘nearly in tears’. Sort your priorities out.

A spa is not like a nail salon. Big difference. IMO very cheeky to take kids there without chrcking first. And you kept asking. Almost begging. You should have politely taken no for an answer and left. No wonder they were annoyed!