School withholding snack as punishment?

[cjs99x]

Hi all,

I wanted your opinion on something that’s happened today at school. For context - in my son’s class they have a morning snack (during juice/milk time on the carpet), lunch time (in the dinner hall) & afternoon snack (outside on the playground).

Today my 5 year old DS was kept inside for afternoon break time as he and another boy had a fight. My son getting into trouble at school is a very rare occurrence and that particular situation has been sorted out.

My concern is that, because he was kept inside for afternoon break time, he was told he wasn’t allowed to have his afternoon snack. All the children in the class was able to have their snack outside as usual, and he was told he wasn’t allowed as part of a consequence of missing his playtime. I mean keeping him inside as a consequence is fair enough, but not allowing him his food that I’ve packed?

I have briefly heard another parent mention something like this before but I wasn’t part of the conversation so I didn’t hear the full story. Obviously my son may be mixed up but he was really upset when he came out saying he was really hungry and is usually accurate when explaining things (even if it means he’ll be in trouble).

Am I being too sensitive here or is this just a very odd punishment for a 5 year old child? I just can’t see how the school is able to withhold a child’s food from them.

I will be speaking to this teacher tomorrow but I guess I’m just wondering if this a normal thing that happens in schools? He’s my only child so this is all knew to me but it just seems extreme

She's already said, more than once, that the pushing has been addressed. 🙄🙄

Incidentally, I clicked on the thread all ready to be outraged on your behalf, expecting to read that a teacher had said 'You've been naughty, so you can't have snack ', but that's clearly not what happened

I don’t think k he’s being starved or anything so YABU the, but I don’t like the idea of a snack being a reward or punishment. It could lead to issues with food on some kids.

@MagicLoopthe snacks aren’t ‘given out’ - the children go and get their snacks from their bag and take them outside with them (apart from the odd child who decides to stay inside in the library area, they have their snack inside instead). When my son went to get his snack, he was told he wasn’t allowed it. Which is why I’m confused, as I didn’t think this was a typical consequence in school. I’m not saying they were ‘starving him’ I just didn’t think snacks were allowed to be used as punishments.

I read that, but the message needs reinforcing. I'd also be asking my child to apologise to the teacher in the morning for the poor behaviour and showing therefore that I agree with them and that it isn't acceptable. This desperation to complain is ridiculous.

Why do kids need a morning and afternoon snack exactly?

It sounds like an over reaction from the teacher anyway. A stern 'Boys, no pushing' should be enough for two boys that are friends & usually well behaved. She's not leaving herself much space to impose punishment for serious misbehaviour.

is this her first year teaching?

Withholding food shouldn't be a punishment. Hunger and thirst also triggers poor behaviour in young children. I do think teachers do an amazing job but there really does need to be more training around appropriate behaviour management.

@ReadyforslippersMy son already apologised to the teacher and to his friend, it’s even written on the incident form. He’s never been in trouble before and felt very guilty (which I’m glad about, as hopefully him feeling guilty will prevent him from doing it again). I’m not ‘desperate’ to complain.

I disagree, there should be a firm and clear no hands on others policy, which it seems there is. No food was withheld, he just didn't have time to go and eat it as he had forfeited his afternoon break.

This is a good lesson. If it works you should be hopeful he won’t do it again. You don’t get afternoon snacks at secondary school, so I am sure just this once he can survive.

Secondary school is 6 years away?

I've worked in lots of primary/infant schools-I've never known one to have afternoon snack!

As it was your snack from his bag, I'm sure you could have just given it to him at 3pm or whenever you collected him.

Have a guess - go on, I dare you to try to figure it out all by yourself.

Thank goodness! At last a sensible response. Withholding food as part of a punishment is wrong.

Yes, if that is what happened. If the child had had no lunch that would be unacceptable. He had no break, meaning no chance for snack. Most primary schools only have a morning snack anyway.

You've been naughty, so do stay indoors in the warm with a nice little snack to learn from this.

Come on, OP.

@ReadyforslippersI think you need to read the thread properly. The snacks are in the bag in the classroom. Most children take it outside with them, the odd child that decides to stay inside and read in the library area eat their snacks inside. My son went to get the snack from his bag and was told he wasn’t allowed it. It wasn’t that there was ‘no time’ or ‘no chance’ - he was told he wasn’t allowed it. You agreeing with that is fine, I’m not here to change your mind, but let’s stop twisting what I am saying.

I work in schools. While most don't even have an afternoon snack, we would never ever not let a child who was hungry eat. If they say they are hungry at any time we'll give them fruit once the lessons are over (ie choosing time). Not letting a hungry child eat should never be a punishment, yanbu.

Did you have the discussion with him about the fight OP? He got in a scrap, he was punished, he missed out on a snack……….part of growing up I guess! But why are kids being given snacks at school?

OP said right at the start that the issue had been dealt with. He pushed back on a boy who pushed him. I’d bet the farm the other boy wasn’t punished.

I just don’t see food as a reward or a punishment. It’s simply food that the children expect and eat at a set time each day.

It’s just like a scene from Oliver Twist.

OP has said that the issue was settled.

I’m going to go against the grain here. Food should never be used as punishment, reward or for comfort. It’s not ok. I would ask the teacher what happened, and go from there.
Obviously the fighting needs to be addressed.