AIBU - that sadly, MN is losing its way?

[IntoChanges]

I’ve been on here for a long time and it just feels like it’s not the same place anymore.☹️
It used to be full of useful advice, proper support, funny threads that would keep you reading for hours; the odd bunfight over parking or a real time thread to liven things up, building curiosity and tension. How invested were we!

Now it seems to be:

• endless politics (so much mis-information, which even when challenged isn't backed up with evidence)
• OPs who never come back after their first ‘interesting’ post (so what’s the point?)
• weirdly written stuff that doesn’t sound like a real person/situation at all
• and a lot of repeat topics/commonly applied situations that feel very ‘clickbait’
• no flow - posters jumping in when they haven't read the thread, saying the same thing again and again; endless arguing when posters take exception to something not directed at them; posters unable to accept a bigger picture of a majority rather than their one single view
• derailed threads (immigration, politics)

I miss the days when you could ask a silly question about your laundry habits, or what to cook for fussy toddlers, and get 100 replies that were funny, blunt, supportive or all three. That felt like the whole point of MN, quite light-hearted but sound advice by real people.

I know the site says it’s “for grown-ups” and they don’t want to over-moderate, which I do get.
But honestly — am I the only one who feels like MN is losing its way a bit? Or is this just where all SM/forums are heading?

I think it depends where you look, @funkylittleboatrace. For example, MNers have recently made two blankets and a cushion to send to a MNer and her dd, when their son/brother died in a road traffic accident. The outpouring of love and support on that thread really are the best of MN.

I agree. I'm absolutely fed up with the frequent pile-ons of posters who come here for support and advice. Seems to happen all the time now. I've had to comment about it a couple of times, but so many more times where I haven't. I don't know why so many people enjoy kicking others when they're down.

Add to that the AI generated threads and it's definitely not what it once was

Yes, I would say it’s quite a bit different. I guess I feel it’s still more congenial than the rest of social media.

It's just not funny anymore, I used to come on for a laugh, for some reason I still log on every day. When was the last time you saw someone suggesting a post go in to classics? Nothing is funny, or heartwarming anymore.

The only posts that make me laugh now are usually on the Telly Addicts topic.

The rest of MN seems full of bots and AI shite.

I totally agree. I’ve been on here 23 years and it’s just awful now. The blatant abelism, zero moderation, unethical advertising, the continual far right threads, the anti immigrant, anti benefits,anti autism ……enabling all day every day. All they care about is making money. It’s so sad, nasty and dull.

Dows anybody know any other forums that are better at moderation and just nicer?

Think we have too much information. Pre Internet things were much calmer, life was slower. "Ignorance is bliss". Now info spreads like wildfire and everyone has an opinion on it.

Like that white nationalist fella Kirk who got shot, the vast majority of people outside america wouldn't have heard of him two weeks ago. And pre internet it would have remained that way. Now though we hear about such people and form a view, and with so many views it can descend into vitriol. Likewise any scandal spreads quickly when previously it would have died down. Anyone with any misdemeanour now must be fired! Everything is so reactionary.

Yup I have seen this too, but there are a lot of really nice posters too.

I missed that.
What board was that on please?

It’s disheartening, but considering how difficult it is to get support, it isn’t surprising. Also, a lot more friendless people out there due to the way the internet culture is.

That is true there are a lot of nice people as well. I mentioned I'm needing to make bread etc with being skint and one woman messaged me to offer some money to help. I couldn't take it but it was quite heart touching for me that someone I don't even know would care

It's probably due to the sheer volume of users, which has increased steadily over the years

Aw that’s really lovely and kind.

Definitely not the same. Even just reading through the list of active threads I find myself thinking, nah, won't bother. Then I click on sthg interesting sounding and like you say it's a pile on or sounds fake.

Absolutely. That’s where I feel threads go no where. There is no intellectual debate, no real answering even when called out. Just an echo chamber of posters with their own views.

So many have mentioned bits, I vaguely know what they are, but not much. Are they here to shut down free views and to try and gather a mass of supportive views. Almost brainwashing, as they make you feel ‘wrong’ for being one a very few who disagree.

It's always been a nest of vipers - you post at your own peril - but people used to take it on the chin and wise up quickly. Now, everyone says theyre being 'picked-on' at the drop of a hat. I agree with the AI, journalist and bot posts though, they're ubiquitous.

The one thing that has admittedly annoyed me recently is all the posts about how Reform is going to win. Firstly, the UK has a different culture to the US. It is a real possibility that Farage wins, but Trump had the backing of a big religious belt in the US. The pockets of right wing areas in the UK do not make up nearly the same amount. Secondly, while it’s ok to have concerns, there isn’t really a need to start so many threads about it. Same goes for all the similar posts about flags and immigrants.

I read so manybpists and think "it's a bot it's click bait"

I've become way more cynical (been here 20 yrs)

The one the other day about the chap running into an ex and having a coffee. So weird ...people proclaiming with absolute certainty it had been prearranged, he was lying, the OP should get her ducks in a row. Some seemed really angry that she wasn't just accepting their view and almost gleefully anticipating a big reveal or update.

I've been on here for about 18 years now and I agree with the pp who said it's a bit reflective of society in general, angrier, snappier, more hostile and cynical.

I really noticed this the other evening.
I'd read a thread about an iPad stuck down the back of a radiator and someone had linked a thread about a hair bobble plate stuck down the back of a toilet which was from 2008. (This was hilarious and a lovely read)
There was a huge difference in the way that thread went to how I think it would go now

I agree @IntoChanges

It used to have waves of being different but I think as it’s become larger and as technology has evolved it’s lost that vibe that it had.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s me, dc are all grown and I should probably move on from mn but keep coming back looking for that ‘community’.

It isn't what it was. The wit and humour aren't as pronounced and the community has slithered off.

Oh the ‘outing’ hobbies! I’m always desperate to know what these are because they must be incredibly niche to pose a risk of being outing. Model aeroplane building while wearing scuba suits? Surely book clubs and basket-weaving wouldn’t cover it! 😂

I do feel like society is certainly more cynical and polarised than before. I know some people who bandwagon on the chance to wish politicians they hate dead and others who think it’s acceptable to remove jobs from people with literally mainstream beliefs.

Totally agree