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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Are all of us foreigners just going to be told to pack up and leave if Reform win?

1000 replies

Onegingerhead · 26/09/2025 16:03

I might be totally unreasonable here (or not), but please hear me out.
(Bloody) foreigner here — I’ve lived in the UK since 2001. Built my whole life here: house, husband, DC, the lot. Worked the whole time in a field that requires the highest level of qualification.
I’m getting increasingly worried about the talk of Reform winning in 2029. Some even say it could be sooner if Labour are pushed into early elections. This week (as we all heard) our beloved Reform suggested rescinding ILR or even settled status from Europeans. God knows what else they’ll come up with, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they went after naturalised Brits next and started revoking citizenship, just to please the voters.
I know a lot of foreign-born women — some married to born-and-bred Brits, some to other Europeans (not always from the same country), some to men from overseas. All sorts of combinations.
So what do you think lies ahead for us? Will we be politely asked to leave, or will things just get so hostile that we’re pushed out anyway? And how likely is it that people who aren’t very white, or who have an accent, will face more discrimination in work?
I’m meeting my foreign friends tonight and we’ll be talking about it. For most of us, moving now would be incredibly difficult. We’re late 30s to early 50s, and starting over in a new country isn’t exactly easy. Some of us are married to men from different countries entirely, and we don’t even speak each other’s languages well enough to get proper jobs there.

AIBU and should think we will actually be allowed to stay?
AINBU sorry but you’d better start planning your move now

OP posts:
Thread gallery
34
Buttercupflowers · 27/09/2025 09:35

This reply has been deleted

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APTPT · 27/09/2025 09:36

Muffinmam · 27/09/2025 08:58

Come back home!! (Fellow Australian here).

Not Aussie but v similar circumstances @MookieCat. We are leaving in November and I am damned if I ever set foot here again.(husband and kids can). Keep giving to this country but scratch the skin of more than half the people here and they think all foreigners are pisstaking dolebludging criminal scum.

Onegingerhead · 27/09/2025 09:37

To be clear, I absolutely don’t hate this country or its people. Even the weather, I actually find the sound of rain soothing, and I love it when it pours.
I can even understand why some people want to vote Reform, and I don’t hold it against them. Some will do it for the sake of change, because they don’t trust Labour or the Conservatives. A fair percentage have bought into the anti-immigrant agenda but what can I do? Smile politely? I don’t think many could be convinced otherwise once they’ve gone down that road. It’s not really the point anyway. The thread was about Mumsnetters’ perception, and it’s clear that most people here don’t necessarily want us out.
Someone mentioned resilience, saying they couldn’t imagine starting afresh in another (or their original) country. That’s exactly it for me too. I’d feel foreign in the country where I was born. I may not sound foreign, but the way I behave and the way I do things is so undeniably British that I wouldn’t fit in easily. Hence was my worry and the thread

OP posts:
Digdongdoo · 27/09/2025 09:37

This reply has been deleted

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Are they? Far left bots? Which posters are they? Report them if they aren't genuine.

But if by "far left bots" you really mean left leaning posters who disagree with you and poke holes in your beloved Farage, then yeah, they're all over this thread.

Gallowayan · 27/09/2025 09:38

Just think about the things Trump said he was going to do. For example, ending the war in Ukraine in a couple of weeks. Fararge is a grifter with no political experience or leadership skills, who basically stirrs up discontent for personal gain.

He is jus one of many people who have promised to fix immigration fix broken Britain etc. Why do you suppose he will be able to carry out what he threatens to do?

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:38

BlueandPinkSwan · 26/09/2025 16:32

Peeps like you OP are welcome here, working, paying your taxes, contributing to society and hopefully intergrating.
It's the illegals that are the problem and many people object to not people like yourselves.

But that isn't what Reform are saying. We already have very clear laws that say illegal immigrants can't stay here, so why would they simply limit themselves to more of the same?

FallingIntoAutumn · 27/09/2025 09:39

APTPT · 27/09/2025 09:36

Not Aussie but v similar circumstances @MookieCat. We are leaving in November and I am damned if I ever set foot here again.(husband and kids can). Keep giving to this country but scratch the skin of more than half the people here and they think all foreigners are pisstaking dolebludging criminal scum.

I’m sorry. This makes me so sad.

Buttercupflowers · 27/09/2025 09:40

Digdongdoo · 27/09/2025 09:37

Are they? Far left bots? Which posters are they? Report them if they aren't genuine.

But if by "far left bots" you really mean left leaning posters who disagree with you and poke holes in your beloved Farage, then yeah, they're all over this thread.

"Are they? Far left bots? Which posters are they? Report them if they aren't genuine."

That's impossible on an anonymous forum, as you are well aware.

CallMeEvelyn · 27/09/2025 09:42

moderate · 27/09/2025 08:45

Who gets to decide what constitutes “bigoted”?

if you have a better political system than liberal democracy, I’m here to listen.

I used to be like you — assured of my own place on the right side of history, ready to dismiss people who disagreed with me as simpletons taken in by charlatans.

Then I found myself branded a bigot for daring to believe that sex matters in various areas of law and society. And I started to wonder who else’s voices might be being shouted down by loud people with luxury beliefs.

So yes, the Overton window is moving to “the right”, because “the left” have abandoned good governance. Farage et al are the effect of that, not the cause.

(Scare-quotes around “the left” and “the right” because they’re increasingly meaningless terms.)

I hear you (and agree with you on the other matter you mentioned).

I think there is a line to be drawn in political discourse.

In this case, nobody is bringing an elephant into the room, painting it black and pretending it's a seal (unlike in your comparison).

We are the group that is painted evil and we are trying to tell you why doing so is not factually correct. And why we should not be victims to Farage's rhethoric. We are not a bunch of illegal criminals coming over here stealing your jobs, or worse, benefits, like he would have you believe.

It is bigotry to stir hatred against us using such rhethoric and to misrepresent the facts when they really matter - in a political debate. Because people vote on that basis and they have the right to be informed, not misinformed.

There should also be no space for racism or xenophobia that are illegal - and yet some people on here dress them up as democratic. They are not.

There are plenty of immigration issues in this country. They need to be discussed - factually and respectfully.

The problem you have is you have two major political parties unable to do so for decades. And then a rogue newcomer like Reform - raising some valid issues on the face of it, but spouting many lies and division. The latter cannot be supported.

Another issue is putting all immigrants into one basket. You cannot give valid consideration to this because each group is diverse with completely different background, prospects, abilities and legal status. To label all "immigrants" as bad for even "coming over here" is extremely inaccurate and damaging to all involved and the British people who are deciding on the basis of this misconception, frankly.

MookieCat · 27/09/2025 09:42

APTPT · 27/09/2025 09:36

Not Aussie but v similar circumstances @MookieCat. We are leaving in November and I am damned if I ever set foot here again.(husband and kids can). Keep giving to this country but scratch the skin of more than half the people here and they think all foreigners are pisstaking dolebludging criminal scum.

Best of luck to you @APTPT .

I hate to say it but I think we are off. We were going to wait until my oldest had completed A-levels as he is quite vulnerable and his school understand him well. The younger one is able to slot in anywhere. But that's 3 years away. DH said last night that he wants to leave by this time next year and he is planning to apply for Oz citizenship then renounce his British citizenship. There are a number of reasons for it, but people like us are just being screwed over in every direction and tbh we are scared stiff of what's coming in the next Reeves budget too.

I won't deny I am angry and more than a little heartbroken. I thought we were here forever. I love Britain and it breaks my heart to see the rapid erosion of everything I held dear here.

Digdongdoo · 27/09/2025 09:42

Buttercupflowers · 27/09/2025 09:40

"Are they? Far left bots? Which posters are they? Report them if they aren't genuine."

That's impossible on an anonymous forum, as you are well aware.

Yeah I meant report to mumsnet. What did you think I meant?
Bots are not allowed here, you can report them and they will be removed.

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:44

IAmThePrettiestManOnMyIsland · 26/09/2025 16:54

There has been no suggestion that all 'foreigners' are to be deported. Only people who have come illegally. I have a fair few foreign friends and I'd be the first to protest if there was even sniff of them being repatriated. It's not going to happen.

But they have said they will deport everyone with indefinite leave to remain. By definition, that is not people who came here illegally. Why do people keep denying this?

FallingIntoAutumn · 27/09/2025 09:45

MookieCat · 27/09/2025 09:33

You haven't misunderstood anything.

My charitable interpretation of posters banging on about 'illegals' is that they simply cannot comprehend that what Farage has actually said (and what has been reported ad infinitum on this same thread) can possibly be true.

After all- who on earth would believe that legal migrants who have already mjumped through all the hoops, and paid all the costs might be deported. Who would believe that such people who have honestly made their lives here for decades might be kicked out? It seems too strange to be true. So these posters simply have a complete mental blank at what they have been told. They can't actually understand what the papers are reporting and the words that literally come out of Farage's own mouth.

My less charitable interpretation is.... less charitable.

It’s like the Brexit promises all over again isn’t it.
any questioning of it is just “project fear”

and yet. Here we are

TankFlyBossW4lk · 27/09/2025 09:46

Onegingerhead · 26/09/2025 16:03

I might be totally unreasonable here (or not), but please hear me out.
(Bloody) foreigner here — I’ve lived in the UK since 2001. Built my whole life here: house, husband, DC, the lot. Worked the whole time in a field that requires the highest level of qualification.
I’m getting increasingly worried about the talk of Reform winning in 2029. Some even say it could be sooner if Labour are pushed into early elections. This week (as we all heard) our beloved Reform suggested rescinding ILR or even settled status from Europeans. God knows what else they’ll come up with, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they went after naturalised Brits next and started revoking citizenship, just to please the voters.
I know a lot of foreign-born women — some married to born-and-bred Brits, some to other Europeans (not always from the same country), some to men from overseas. All sorts of combinations.
So what do you think lies ahead for us? Will we be politely asked to leave, or will things just get so hostile that we’re pushed out anyway? And how likely is it that people who aren’t very white, or who have an accent, will face more discrimination in work?
I’m meeting my foreign friends tonight and we’ll be talking about it. For most of us, moving now would be incredibly difficult. We’re late 30s to early 50s, and starting over in a new country isn’t exactly easy. Some of us are married to men from different countries entirely, and we don’t even speak each other’s languages well enough to get proper jobs there.

AIBU and should think we will actually be allowed to stay?
AINBU sorry but you’d better start planning your move now

I think you're right to be worried. I am. I was born here but don't think I'm going to be able to/or want to stay in the UK if reform come in.

I've seen a real uptick in racism, levels I haven't seen since the 70s.

Digdongdoo · 27/09/2025 09:46

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:44

But they have said they will deport everyone with indefinite leave to remain. By definition, that is not people who came here illegally. Why do people keep denying this?

Edited

Reform intend to redefine the parameters of legal migration. I think his fans ignore this because it doesn't suit them to really think through the consequences. Blind finger pointing is far easier.

certainlycertain · 27/09/2025 09:47

Buttercupflowers · 26/09/2025 17:52

That is incorrect - see my post at 17.40

Ours, which we got in about 2008, did. It said right on the paper, no recourse to public funds. Despite the fact we were paying a lot of tax.

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Who, precisely? What makes you think so?

CallMeEvelyn · 27/09/2025 09:49

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Who is this, sorry? I have a strong feel in the opposite direction here, actually.

FWIW, I am 100% not left leaning and if I were voting in this country, it would not be for Labour or the Greens for sure. I don't think I would have anyone to vote for, which is why I will not pay £2k for citizenship where there's a total lack of centric, sensible representation.

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:53

Livelovebehappy · 27/09/2025 09:00

But people are not understanding and taking some of what he says out of context and deliberately scaremongering.

What exactly are people taking out of context about his plans for people with ILR? And what is your evidence for it?

Buttercupflowers · 27/09/2025 09:54

certainlycertain · 27/09/2025 09:47

Ours, which we got in about 2008, did. It said right on the paper, no recourse to public funds. Despite the fact we were paying a lot of tax.

Here is the post I referred to

While holders of certain visa types, such as visitors or short-term students, will be expected to eventually return home, some categories of limited leave may lead to settled status in the UK. Settled status gives the holder permission to stay in the UK on a permanent basis. This is known as indefinite leave to remain (ILR).
Note that ‘settled status’ with ILR is different to the EU settlement scheme for EEA nationals in the UK.
Individuals with ILR are not subject to immigration restrictions in the UK. You can leave and enter the UK at will. ILR does not expire, unless you have been absent from the UK for more than two years.
If you hold ILR status, you may also become eligible to certain entitlements, such as welfare benefits and tax credits. The exception is if your right to remain was awarded as a result of another person formally agreeing to maintain and accommodate you. In this case, you will be excluded from some benefits for five years.

Note the last paragraph.

Coldcafe · 27/09/2025 09:58

WearyAuldWumman · 26/09/2025 21:52

waves merrily

My mum was Scottish and I was born in Scotland; however, dad was an Eastern European Displaced Person.

When I was in my first middle management post in a central belt Secondary School very close to my birthplace, a new chap got a job as a Behaviour Support teacher at our school. At the time, I was still using my maiden name.

He approached me one day. I thought he was going to ask for information about a pupil. "So...when did you come to this country?"

I gave him my time and date of birth.

"Wow. You even remember that? It must have made quite an impression on you!"

"No, but it made a helluva impression on my mum."

The new bloke was from the south of England. I guess my Scottish accent sounded foreign to him.

Yup, sounds all too familiar. My Grandparents were also displaced persons who cane from Poland. I've had to deal with bigotry my whole life, constantly being ask where I'm really from (I'm white and born in Scotland too) and at points feeling very scared. I can remember in the early 2000s sitting on a bus with a huge middle aged man ranting and raving about the F*CKING POLISH!!! very scary as a teenage girl. The underlying bigotry still exists. People look down on Eastern Europeans all the time and have done for decades.

FallingIntoAutumn · 27/09/2025 09:59

I think very few are far left and very few are far right. There’s a spectrum. Finger pointing and shouting from either far corner does little to discuss the issues (on both sides).

I am scared reform will get in and people are blindly ignoring what’s being written and said by reform “oh that won’t happen” Because we cannot fathom it could happen here in Britain. The country that stood up against the nazis. But it can happen, be very careful what you vote for. Read everything, not your own interpretation of it, before accepting those terms and conditions.

it’s like project 25. Written in black and white, yet still denied it could happen.

Twiglets1 · 27/09/2025 09:59

Ratafia · 27/09/2025 09:44

But they have said they will deport everyone with indefinite leave to remain. By definition, that is not people who came here illegally. Why do people keep denying this?

Edited

They haven’t said they will deport everyone with ILR.

They said they would be abolishing ILR and replacing it with 5 year work visas for non EU nationals.

Non EU nationals would be at risk of deportation if they don’t qualify for the 5 year work visas which on the current plans, seem hard to qualify for as you have to be earning 60k a year.

CallMeEvelyn · 27/09/2025 10:02

There's a reason why Reform is leading in the polls. One can explain till death in plain English, and yet...

Twiglets1 · 27/09/2025 10:02

FallingIntoAutumn · 27/09/2025 09:59

I think very few are far left and very few are far right. There’s a spectrum. Finger pointing and shouting from either far corner does little to discuss the issues (on both sides).

I am scared reform will get in and people are blindly ignoring what’s being written and said by reform “oh that won’t happen” Because we cannot fathom it could happen here in Britain. The country that stood up against the nazis. But it can happen, be very careful what you vote for. Read everything, not your own interpretation of it, before accepting those terms and conditions.

it’s like project 25. Written in black and white, yet still denied it could happen.

Agree very few far left or far right, the vast majority of us are somewhere in the middle so we should be able to discuss the issues politely.

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