Why why why are they like this!!!

[Hellofrances]

My boyfriend stayed overnight at my house for the first time on Wednesday.

We both had yesterday off so had a lazy morning watching tv in bed.

He broke wind really loud and grabbed my head and forced it under the covers, I couldn’t move from under them for about 10 seconds.

He thought it was hilarious, I told him I’m a 37 year old woman and don’t appreciate that.

I think it’s the fact we’d not long been intimate and he was being really jokey.

I told one of my friends who found it amusing and said it’s a sign he’s comfortable around me which is good, but I don’t agree!

He'd be gone. I'm so serious.

He forced you. Forced and held. He's that kind of person.

That would be a deal breaker for me. Sorry he's a dick, @Hellofrances

'They' are not like this. I have never had a boyfriend do this, so there is no way I would put this down to normal male behaviour. Your friend sounds like a handmaiden.

I think you mean your ex boyfriend

He's really, really testing your boundaries here. He's trying to find out how disgusting and physically coercive he can be before you say anything.

If you wave this through as a misplaced 'joke', he will up the ante next time.

This is how abuse starts. It never looks like abuse in the beginning. It's only when you look back after years of it and can pinpoint the moment where he discovered how far he could push it and what he could get away with.

They’re not all like this. I’ve never had that happen to me!
Utterly grim. I’d even expect a 7yo to behave better. That would be the end of the relationship for me. No way would I want to have sex with that again.

That is ridiculous....why western men do this....I am EU and had a French boyfriend very humble looking and behaving kind. In our first holiday together and happening to be first intimate encounter, between sex, he put my hands under me and tried to hold me like that ....without any explanation etc. He was very skinny and not that strong, so I fought him off and really felt almost suffocating, I have very gentle lungs. Asked him what was that for and he laughed and said he was trying my character and apparently I am feisty woman and men prefer compliant women. The whole thing was bizarre. Since I was hosting him in my country, I glossed over it and gave the relationship a chance. Only to discover later he is the dick he showed himself to be. He did not dare do anything physically to me because he saw I am quite strong but he tried to suffocate me in other ways. RUN AWAY NOW

That’s revolting!! What an asshole. I’d be done with him.

Oh my lord no thank you.

As others have said, it is the use of force that is a red flag for me. Get out whilst you can.

I will give you another example. Believe the fucking bastards the first time they show you something and run away my dear. I went out with a friend, here in the UK, she had this boyfriend. We were playing pool. She went to the bar and we were playing together, I scored and had another go, but he did not understand the game well. So he started arguing with me about the go and like seriously and when I bent down to do the go, he snatched the stick out of my hands violently.

she came back and I told her what happened, she shrugged her shoulders. A month later he threw her across the room

Smells are particulate, so you were breathing in his poo. Nice. Add in the violence and the question is why haven’t you thrown him out already.

He is cruel. This is not funny. It is abuse. Are you happy for things like this to escalate making your future very bleak?

That's disgusting. Im not precious about people farting around me, but forcing my head under the covers to smell it and holding me there for 10 seconds would have me seriously reconsidering the relationship. Fuck that.

Edit- actually no, I wouldnt reconsider the relationship, id end it.

My sister’s husband started their relationship doing stuff like this. Then he moved on to calling her fat in front of company, forcing her into ‘play fighting’ and bringing her ‘presents’ like a dead mouse in a sandwich bag when she was pregnant, with the constant refrain ‘it’s a JOKE, I’m JOKING’.

And that was just the stuff her Mum and sisters knew about.

She stayed with him and he sexually abused their young daughter. My sister blamed her and chose him over her child.

I know that they’re still together in their 70’s although I went NC with my sister because of him forty years ago.

these situations are real and these are signs of selfish, abusive men

Oh my god. That's the perfect way to get pink eye.

My mother was/is still married with a horrible abusive mentally ill man. She never did anything to protect herself or her children. This is why I stayed unmarried for decade and a half, checking and combing potential partners with a veeeeeryyyy fine toothcomb and can assure you found someone who is all right

You must not have been here long!

Would he find it equally hilarious if one of his manchild mates did that to him? He does not respect you one little bit. Maybe your friend and him should get together seeing as they both find it hilarious and amusing.

I would be so long gone. I’ve never had this in a relationship and it’s not normal. A Dutch oven, maybe, MAYBE, would be forgiveable if he farted and just pulled the cover up. It would be disgusting and immature still though.

But the holding your head and restraining you? Nope. I would have chucked him out so fast.

this is NOT normal male behaviour, i've not known a single man to do this. do not use the word 'they'

this reminded me of the story I read https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwi-r5aqufaPAxVHQkEAHfnsDr0QFnoECB8QAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ladbible.com%2Fnews%2Fhealth%2Ftravel-influencer-seven-year-infection-ecoli-farting-face-588819-20250529&usg=AOvVaw3BugpHxSf11XKZ2ECiIQXS&opi=89978449

My first thought was that he could have damaged the OP's neck.