Snapped in the parent and child parking

[seize]

Juggling my 3 month old from their baby carrier trying to get them into the car seat, a car pulls in and asks me to close my door, while I’m halfway into getting my baby in their seat.

Out hops a child in school uniform about 10 years old, not help needing any help to get out, my face must have had an expression of surprise. Someone in need of this space being asked to stop what they’re doing to allow someone not in need of the space to use it. The adult said “ignorant” loudly at me. So I snapped back, “these spaces are for people with babies and children that need help getting in and out, they aren’t for older children” she snaps something back at me about not knowing how old their child is (the one that is in school uniform, fairly tall, that needed no help getting out and is now safely stood in a car park without the adult needing to have them in their line of sight) and the bratty child screams “yeah!”.

I’ve had it with these spaces, they aren’t a convenience for people that happen to have a person under the age of 16 with them. They’re for people who genuinely need the help getting them in and out and need the extra space.

Oh dear and your child is only 3 months old and assume you only have 1.

I'd brace myself for the time ahead.

Aren’t they usually for kids under 12?

No, I have two and when both are with me with their double pushchair to content with, it winds me up even more.

Why would a 12 year old need this space? there’s a small number of spaces they have extra space either side, so people can open the car door fully to get a child that needs assistance in and out.

if you have been through the juggling baby seats around years (ie the other person) it is a dick move to ask someone in the middle of that to close their door.

As pp said, if this is your first DC, OP, pull on your hard hat and get on with things.

In that situation? "won't be a sec, it's such a faff isn't it?" will do. (in a BOSS MOVE that i love, Meadowhall require you to report to their info stand with the child involved, so you can pick up a parking pass for the P&C.Fabulous)

I am much like you and get so angry when people who didn’t need the space use the space. It’s there for those helping children in and out of cars.

The women definitely shouldn’t have asked you to move though but I try to just moan about to and then move on with my day.

Saying all that my DP gets so annoyed when I do moan about it. Maybe he gets the worst of the moan.

The woman was a wanker

Did you fart as well?

Parent and child spaces can be used by anybody with children up to twelve years old.

Morally if the spaces in that car park are in high demand then parents with fully able children should be considerate and park elsewhere but that is not for you to judge or police.

The adult looked like the grandparent, so who knows how long it has been for them to remember that stage. I think this was what really got me wound up. It’s one thing to park there but another to see someone with an extremely young baby trying to get them in and have the audacity to expect them to bend over backwards for someone to get out who clearly doesn’t need the extra room.

Because god forbid anyone should be ever held to account for choosing not to do the decent thing. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Or do you prefer a nanny state?

Morally they shouldn’t have called me ignorant as well, after asking me to stop what I’m doing so their independent child could get out faster. :(

??? 🤔

If I could have timed a fart when my back was bent over and they were telling me to stop what I was doing so they could get out quicker… I would have.

but you have no idea if they need the extra room? When my DC were primary ages, one of my biggest fears in a car park was them smashing the car door into the next parked car. From that POV, using the P&C spot is the way to go.

Under 5’s.

I agree with her on that.

You were being ignorant. You made an assumption about their need for the space purely based on your visual assessment of her child.

YANBU. You should have told her 'You'll need to wait until I'm done.'

So you were asked to pause what you needed to do so an older child could hop out, close their door and then be out of your way. Sounds sensible to me. More sensible then making them wait till you were done or them opening their door into you as you do what you need to.

Thats partly the point of child locks, so the parent has to open the door from the outside.

You don’t know anything about her child, he may have been younger, had a hidden disability or anything! you can use those spaces until a child is 12.

My eight year old has autism but looks older as soon as we stop he will throw the door open totally ignoring the car next to us possibly denting it and run to the store. I feel I need to park in parent in child spaces with him in fear of damaging peoples property.

YANBU to find this annoying. I stopped using these spaces as soon as mine were out of car seats and could be trusted to get themselves in and out of the car. There’s no need for parents of school age children to need them unless there are additional needs at play. I think people conveniently forget how much hassle young babies and todders are to get in and out of the car. You need to open the door much wider.

Based on watching the child get out of the car themselves and then the adult being able to start an argument with me and have no consideration for keeping the child in their line of sight while doing so. If the child requires this extra space to get in and out safely and needing the assistance to do so, then I expect their responsible adult would be needing to keep them in their eye of sight at all times.

Right so with your child with additional needs, you are starting arguments with people and having no consideration for keeping the child in your line of sight when doing this yeah?

No pp is correct they are for children 12 and under.