Aibu to think this is a good salary?

[jamsandwich5]

Just to settle an argument. My husband and I respectively take home 33k and 31k a year after tax.

I work 30 hours, he works 38. He wants me to up my hours but I don’t see why as we don’t struggle for money and I am happy having a bit of spare time to sort kids school admin etc.

AIBU to think 64k for a household (of4) is plenty?

Our financial position is remarkably similar. I do slightly longer days but only work 4. On my day off I do the laundry, chores and food shopping. It means at the weekend when the kids are off school and we aren't working we can actually do stuff together and not waste the time on house stuff. I won't be giving up my day "off" for anything. We're very comfortable financially and there's more to life than money.

Since when is 38 hours not full time? 😂

It is for me. I work for 35 hours which is classed as FT hours for my entire (massive) company.

I wouldn't say good, no.

Doable, yes

YANBU!! Honestly, I’d choose time over money any day. I increased my hours from 29 to 33.5 but still remained at 4 days and it wasn’t worth it, I work much longer days, have shorter lunches and I lost holidays because our leave system works in hours and barely got much more for it. I’m going to request I go back to 30.
is your husband giving you a hard time about this? Do you do the majority of the care/ domestic stuff/ house and life admin? That’s a job in itself.

I agree with other comments, even if you increased your hours would you be spending it on childcare anyway? If you are managing on your wages then I would stay as you are.

I currently work 34 hours and once DC2 starts school will be keeping my 1 day off a week. For me increasing my hours isn’t worth it, if I can have some breathing space from week of constantly juggling I’m having it.

The point is that perhaps "getting by" is not enough for him? Perhaps he wants you to save for a rainy day? No-one can blame him, it's just two different views on how to live. I'd be more thinking like him. You sound more laid back. You should try to compromise I think.

I completely agree :)

Why on earth would anyone give up precious time if they are already financially comfortable. Wonder if he's jealous and actually doesn't appreciate how he benefits from the discrepancy between yours and his hours- surely family life would be harder/more hectic- needing to rush around in the evenings, needing to catch up on housework more at weekends.

It is plenty. We are outside London, mortgage 700, less spare money but still over 1000. I am not changing anything right now

Unless you have a career you're genuinely really interested in and want to go back to, there's no way I'd consider it. There's nothing wrong with wanting to spend time on family life! You shouldn't have to justify that to your husband or anyone else.

I also work 3 days a week and OH is FT, and wouldn't change it, despite the fact we are very low on money. If we could afford to, both of us would work less and spend more time with our 4 and 2yos. Luckily my OH is on the same page as me.

I'd also point out, "we always said" is on the past, possibly in different circumstances.

What was the reason then?

Money - you are doing fine for money. Was the plan to save more (and if so, for what? Safety cushion? Bigger house? More holidays?)

Your career prospects? Does doing 30 hours prevent you from being promoted?

Whatever the reason was then, does it still hold? Is it still important to you both?

Tell him he can do all school drop off, or organization of them, all cooking cleaning if you up your hours, tell him you will emplor a cleaner ( I pressed wring on the vote ) I voted yanbu

Yanbi. I'd settle the argument by agreeing to increase my hours to bring home the same salary and faux-naively sit him down to split drop offs, food shops etc

If you live ok and love it simply, and are not bothered by people's opinions who see pride in money and possessions, then perhaps you can tell your husband this

on another thread someone said their friend has massive house, all shiny and sleep and characterless and not a single belonging to show some love to her own life, no art, no cushions, no throws, no books. I am living on a what is considered low income but lack absolutely nothing , so far holidays, repairs, savings, heating, nothing has been a problem of much hard budgeting - life is for living and that does not always equals buying expensive..

You earn roughly the same at the moment. If your husband wants more money, what’s stopping him trying to advance at work?

Wouldn’t touch the sides here. When I was a single parent the least I could live off was £45k.

if it work for you, where you are then that awesome OP. But my reality is our life now costs £160k ( 6 people)

If you’re not struggling for money and not particularly bothered about savings then yes, I’d keep my hours as is.

I’d have mixed feelings about DH wanting me to up my hours when the salary difference between us is so little, though. I’d be questioning where is that coming from.

Myself and my husband earn very similarly to you both and I also work 30hrs. Working 30hrs means I have 1 non working day a week and that day I do food shopping, laundry and cleaning, admin, gift and Christmas shopping, dentist appointments, take stuff to charity shops, batch cooking, decorating, DIY, garden work etc. plan holiday, clothes/uniform shopping etc etc.
I have considered upping my hours too but the extra money would mean a real struggle with life balance and would need to pay for extra day of wraparound care for kids and it wouldn't be worth it. I'd have to spend every weekend doing the stuff I do on my non working day and so less time to spend with the kids etc. I don't want that. The weekend is precious as the kids are already in wrap around care a lot during the week after school.

Ps. I also live in south West so a joint salary here of £60k is ok. Not rich but ok!

I think it sounds fine. I think those who live within their means are much happier than those always chasing more. I could go full time and add about 10k to our joint income but the impact it would have on us all is just not worth it.

DD should be paying that.

YANBU
Considering there is only 2k difference in salary and you work 8 hours less than him a week - maybe he should be the one looking to up his salary if he feels he needs more money