"Can I take you out for a meal"?

[RachelTopliss]

Would you find this odd? It sounds like it's come from the 70s. What's a meal anyway? It sounds creepy. Lunch or dinner maybe yes but a meal?

I said I was busy.

OP, are you very young? The phrase you used in a date context would normally mean dinner. Perhaps young people don't usually say "meal"? The equivalent for me would be when my dad referred to dinner as his "evening meal." I don't know, it just sounded old-fashioned. I always called it dinner.

I believe "fortnight" might be on the way out for Gez Z, too. Could be wrong.

I think the sentence is totally, completely normal. I can hardly think of a more normal way to ask someone out. Not creepy in the slightest. That's why I wondered if you're very young and this is a generation thing. I don't know what the young say. "Want to get some bussin' pizza all up in our grills? Wear your best drip. We'll slay, no cap."

Better? 😂

Crikey, you sound like hard work.

Get over yourself 🤣🙄

It means they'll pay. (Normally.)

Some people are very touchy!😂

Agree, it's creepy and I think of the Seinfeld episode with his friend Bania- "Soup's not a meal." "Can I get my meal?"

The word 'meal' always comes up in the ick-type threads but I can never fathom why people find it so repulsive.

@NapoleonsToeit's uncle-ish. OP said that the phrase was something her uncle would say.

I agree. It’s interesting how touchy people get about women expressing an opinion about a man they might/might not want to date.

You might be horrified to know I don’t like doors being opened for me if it’s because I’m a woman.

I guess we can't control what we find creepy or cringe-inducing, but I do think you're limiting your options and possibly missing out on something wonderful if you allow yourself to be turned off by every little thing. Still, if you're not compatible, I suppose the sooner you find out, the better it is for you both!

I don't think I've ever known anyone for a significant length of time who hasn't eventually phrased things in a way I wouldn't have chosen. I've cringed at the things that come out of my own mouth many, many times, too. I don't think you'd have found it a 'turn-downable offence' if you were attracted to him, so maybe it's just as well.

Would you like to go out for food? - same turn of phrase but sounds better

Meal is a horrible word.

Aha, thank you

Meal sounds like something dogs eat. Horrible word 🤮

You’ve got issues mate.

A meal is breakfast, lunch, dinner/tea.

Take you out = will you join him.

He’s dodged a massive bullet here.

Nothing wrong with it. Have you also considered the person doing the asking might have been feeling a bit nervous and their words came out wrong, if ‘ meal’ is such a faux pas for your generation (whatever that is)

There really are strange people out there.

Oh dear we always say something like that in my family "mum would you like to go out for a meal for your birthday?" so it's definitely not said in a creepy way! I'll be thinking about this next time the birthdays come round!

I would have thought it preferable to “go for food”, I picture cavemen when I hear that phrase. Either way it sounds like the chap had a lucky escape.

I doubt anyone has ever said or implied that you need to be taken out and treated. When someone has a romantic interest in you, and is offering to take you out and pay, it’s a nice gesture, and should be taken as so.

Decline the invitation for whatever reason you like, but it seems this wave of modern feminism has left a bitter taste in everyone. Why do so many women jump to this defensive state of “I don’t need no man” at the slightest sign of chivalry. I’m from another culture and was discussing something similar on an earlier thread. If I am invited to dinner by a man it is expected that it will be his treat, I don’t see any offense in this.

User name checks out! 🤭

Gosh you are all acting like she should be grateful and owes this man a date.

Creepy?

Well, my mind is blown. Sometimes I say 'we were out for a meal', genuinely had no idea I was being creepy.

Sounds like the poor lad has had a lucky escape.

By saying "a meal" he was leaving it open to you to choose lunch or dinner. Stop being weird. It's hard asking someone out - he doesn't need you reading all sorts of daft things into his invitation.

No one has said that, at all.

Yes, you're busy posting on mumsnet which is obviously more enjoyable than food with someone whose company you enjoy. Assuming you were into them because you appear to object to the wording more than the sentiment.

Obviously you aren't into them. Wild horses wouldn't have kept me away from a date with DH.