DD and boyfriend are wasting their lives

[FiddIedeedee]

DD 27 and her boyfriend (also 27) are proper home bodies. All they seem to do in their free time is go for country walks with their dogs, meals out or Sunday markets 😂

When I was in my 20s I was partying, clubbing and getting up to all sorts, I fear they are wasting their youth!

Last weekend they baked cookies and went on a long country walk with the dogs with a pub lunch. DD spends a lot of time reading and crocheting bits here and there. The boyfriend has started furniture restoration as a hobby. They’re like an old couple honestly!

DD got annoyed with me because I said to them they need to be out enjoying their 20s (and soon 30s) and not acting like a couple in their 60s. DP says leave them be but I just don’t want them to regret not living life to the full. You’re a long time old as they say.

AIBU?

I really don't understand anyone trashing someone else's idea of happiness, just because it isn't theirs. That's so odd.

I find it a little ironic that you want your daughter to see more of the world outside of a cosy bubble, but you’re the one (having supposedly lived a little yourself) with a very narrow view on how a person should live their life and what makes a person interesting or boring.

As someone who did the partying and was over it by early 20s, there is nothing about clubbing, drinking, or even travelling actually that makes a person interesting!

I’m so glad my children DONT behave how I did when I was in my early 20s !!

Yes, and travelling the world costs a lot more than camping in the Peak District! I was training in my career job at 27 and couldn't just take off and go round the world.

Only if you’re at all interested in partying. Not everyone is, and it’s no waste to do things you enjoy - whether that’s partying or not

But if they’re happy what does it matter? Sounds more like you want to be out clubbing and can’t deal with it.

I’m in my 30s I’m a home body I’d rather go out for a nice dinner and a glass of wine then go clubbing I have to be in mood to go out out so to speak.they would of been in thier early 20s during Covid and a lot of ppl who didn’t experience the night life just like the quiet I know I do now!but when I was in my 20s we where wild lol 😂 I think my mum wished I’d have liked to stay at home and go on walking holidays.x

Seeing as she seems to think a trip to Japan (no doubt sticking to Tokyo and maybe a trip to Mount Fuji) or getting pissed in some shitty pub is the height of experiencing the world I highly doubt it!😂

27 is old for clubbing! I did that in my teens/early 20s, but was definitely over it by mid 20s.

They'd be typical amongst my adult DC and their friends. It's you who sounds out of touch.

Speak for yourself - am 50 and still enjoying the odd night out dancing until 2am.

Agree, sounds great, they have a lovely sounding life

Not everyone wants to be out and about everywhere. Some people are perfectly happy and love their little Boring lives.

This is just like the whole extroverts thinking they are better and know better than introverts.

No just one side doesn’t sit there banging on about the other being wrong or bad. They just live their happy life not giving a fuck what others think.

There is actually a whole thing of younger people being in their granny eras gardening and such. Really though it’s people disconnecting from the 24/7 digital world and fast pace. Just living life at a slower pace which was normal at one point before everyone had to be doing something all the time.

I love exploring the U.K. I find it sad when people haven’t but have been to loads of places aboard but couldn’t tell you anything about their own countries. I did both as a child and teen and I still pick exploring the U.K. over say another treck though the Dominican or a dive bar in Ibiza.

Everyone who’s anyone gets their crochet out in September.

YABVU.

Their life sounds delightful to me.

You are as unreasonable as OP.

Sounds perfect to me!

I know what you are saying. My kids are really boring compared to what I did when I was their age. I wouldn't even tell them what I got up to (not sure I can remember it all!). However, if they are happy, that is fine; they can always change their minds in the future. TBH they are probably wiser than I was, but I did have a blast!!!

Maybe this young woman will do that when she's 50. Or 60.

It’s quite ironic that you’re username is fiddle.

stop fiddling! I would much rather my child have the life yours has got than the one you had. I’d much prefer to know my daughter was safe of an evening than our getting up to god knows what like you say. You should be proud and nothing more and what’s more it’s not your life it’s theirs and they are happy if they weren’t they’d do more about it. Their life
sounds beautiful.

Maybe she's having a blast? Just a different kind.

I hope your sweet daughter isn't aware of the contempt in which you seem to hold her and her chosen lifestyle

You're assuming all twenty somethings want to experience clubbing and getting up to no good, maybe your daughter has absolutely no desire for any of that. I didn't in my twenties and now at almost 40 I still don't think I missed out on anything! Leave them be, it sounds like a great way to live and be proud that they've carved a lovely little life out for themselves. Trust that if they wanted to spend their twenties partying then they would be. Given their interests, it doesn't sound like that would be their scene at all anyway.

So, the thing is: everyone has a different version of “living a little” and some don’t include mindless excursions to nightclubs where they pay through the nose for grotty drinks, are exposed to ear-shattering beats and can’t hear anyone around them, rendering conversation impossible!
Long walks with the dogs, cosy pub dinners, and learning artisanal crafts makes it sound like they are extremely mature, content and likely to enjoy their lives!
I really don’t think they’ll regret what they are doing now, ever!

Clubbing isn't the only way to live. In fact it's a fairly boring and generic way to spend your time if you ask me. Their lives sound cosy and interesting and full. It's weird that you're interfering in the activities of two adults who are perfectly content because you think they should be spending more time drunk or hungover.